Darling, I Just Can't Go On

Walking silently between Alex and Rian through the damp school parking lot, I twirled my camera around my wrist by the holding strap, listening to their conversation about the show that they were performing later that night.

"So yeah, no practice today." Rian said just as we were reaching his car.

Alex nodded in reply as we continued down the line until we reached my car, him sliding into the front seat with ease. Starting up the car, I quickly backed out of the spot and pulled up to the Pick-Up lane so we could wait for Jack to exit the school.

"So am I just dropping you guys off at home or what?" I asked as Alex picked up my iPod to change the song, me giving a small chuckle when Bowling For Soup started playing.

"You can always just hang out at my place with me," He suggested giving a small shrug.

"Yeah sure," I replied. "It's not like I have plans today or anything."

"Do you need to grab anything from your house to get ready for tonight?" He questioned.

"Nah, I was just going to wear this," I said referring to my pale, horizontally stripped tank top and dark demin skinny jeans.

Before anything else could be said, we were pulled away from the conversation by Jack's high pitched screaming as he yanked the back door of the car open and folded himself in quickly. Looking out of the window every few seconds he yelled for me to drive as a very angry librarian stomped out the front doors, making him duck down quickly.

"I didn't mean to knock the book shelf over!" He said breathlessly as I pulled down the hill, shaking my head lightly while Alex just laughed his ass off.

Ten minutes later, I had already dropped Jack off at his house and drove Alex and I back to his own house.

Shutting off the car, I followed him inside, finding his mother sitting in the kitchen drinking tea with today's newspaper in hand.

"Hey ma," Alex greeted placing a kiss on her cheek, as he always did, when he walked past her to get to the fridge.

He pulled out two bottles of water and motioned me to follow him up to his room, which I did quickly as to avoid a conversation with his mom. I had met her a few times already, but I was still weary of her accusing me of dating Alex or something which would just make me feel awkward. I just wasn't prepared for that kind of conversation yet.

Once in Alex's room, I flopped down onto his bed, soon after being joined by Baz who happily lapped at my face with his little pink tongue.

"I swear he likes you more than he likes me," Alex pouted as he sat on the bed beside me, only for Baz to bounce right over to greet him with wet puppy kisses as well.

"Are you sure about that?" I laughed, grabbing one of the bottles of water from where he had set them on his bedside table, me having to stretch myself over his lap to grab one.

I stayed sprawled over him as I twisted the cap off, taking a few sips before returning the cap and putting the bottle back on the small table. I rolled over onto my back, making Baz have to climb onto my stomach to escape being trapped between Alex and I, but did not remove myself from Alex's lap.

"You're quite comfy," I commented to him as i slowly stroked the dog's long fur.

"So you've told me before," He replied while sticking his tongue out, but sat back and got himself comfortable none the less.

"Would you mind if I took a nap?" I asked a few minutes later just before a yawn escpaed me.

"Go ahead," He shrugged. "I was thinking of taking one myself so I'm ready for tonight."

I just nodded as I repositioned myself so that Alex and I were side by side rather than me across his lap, Baz making a sound of detest when I moved him to lie next to me. With a small sigh I curled into Alex's side, easily slipping away into a dreamland.

~~

I sank down into a slightly uncomfortable chair as the boys moved around the backstage excitedly, their energies having doubled over easily in the last half hour since we had arrived to the small club just outside of Baltimore.

Their set was coming up soon and I was excited for them, but still nervous about being in such a crowded area with so many people cramed together in such a small building.

Just as he had promised, Alex stayed by my side as much as he could, but when it came time for the boys to play, I simply stood off to the side of the stage as they all bounced into the view of the crowd, making everyone go wild.

I couldn't help the smile that easily spread across my face at how the boys lit up at the response the crowd had given their entrance. They all looked ecstatic and thrilled to no end, their energy and performance showing just that.

It seemed like their set flew past due to how well they played and how much the crowd was getting into it, but soon enough they came flying off the stage, their spirits through the roof.

"That was so amazing!" I cheered as Alex's body crashed into mine, his sweaty arms warpping tightly around my small frame.

"God I know. That was the best show we've ever played." He said, his breathing labored and short, but the smile never leaving his face as he buried it into the side of my neck.

I laughed as I wrapped my arms around him as well, hugging him just as tight as he rocked the two of us back and forth lightly.

It wasn't until later that night, when we were all getting ready to leave when things took a nasty turn.

I followed the boys out the side door of the club, jumping onto Alex's back as we exited, him catching me by the backs of my legs easily, carrying me the rest of the way out. They had all of their equiptment packed away in the van that their manager had gotten for them and we were about to climb in when a girl approached Alex, me still on his back.

"Such a great show Lex," She said, voice dripping with an emotion I couldn't pinpoint.

I could feel Alex tense under me at her words, but he kept a firm grip on me when I tried to slip down his back to escape the conversation I was sure I wasn't supposed to be a part of.

"What are you doing here Lisa?" He asked, and it was then that I realized just who the brown haired girl was, her having dyed her hair a darker shade from the original blonde color.

"I just came out to support my favorite band," She said with a smirk. "Is that such a bad thing Lex?"

I felt his grip on me loosen and I took this as my chance to let my feet hit the ground, turning to go stand next to Zack and the others when Alex quickly caught my wrist with his hand, giving it a small squeeze as if to ask me to stay.

"Well who is this little cuite?" She asked upon seeing me slinked behind his tall form.

"Leave her alone Lisa," Alex said quickly, backing away slowly with me pulling him along to the others so we could leave.

"I just want to know the name of the girl who so easily replaced me," She spat, her voice laced with bitterness.

"Let's just go Alex," I mumbled giving him another tug.

He looked down at me and nodded, both of us turning as he dropped his grip on my wrist, only to drape his arm over my shoulders and pull me agaisnt his side.

"I'm so sorry about her," He said once we had climbed into the van, the other band members and their manager, Matt, following soon after.

"It's fine," I mumbled quietly so that the other's wouldn't hear my words. "Don't worry about her."

"The problem is, I'll never not worry her. I know what she's capable of, and I don't want that to be inflicted on you in any way."

I just nodded, resting my head against his shoulder as Matt started the van, pulling out of the slowly emptying parking lot.