Sex and White Lies
Two
I spent about two days at Alex’s. I didn’t want to overstay my welcome, so I made sure I was out of there in a few days. Alex kept asking me where I was going, and I said I didn’t know. He kept saying he’d bring me to his sisters, but I always shook my head. My sister’s husband wasn’t exactly fond of me. Nobody really was at this point in my life, apparently. I wasn’t surprised, though. I had cut off almost all contact with anyone in my life. I only ever called my sister on holidays like Christmas, or her birthday, and those calls never lasted long. I didn’t even talk to my dad anymore.
My relationship with my dad was never the strongest of relationships. My dad blamed me for a lot of things going on his life. He blamed me for why he lost his job, his drinking problem, and of course he blamed me for my mom leaving him. The only reason my sister got along with him was because she was his biological child. I was the product of a one night stand between my mom and some stranger she had known for a total of three hours. It also didn’t help my case that my dad didn’t like my friends. Every time Jack would come over, my dad would just glare at him over his newspaper. And when he would leave, that’s when it would get bad.
My sister was thirteen years older than me, so she was rarely around. She was there for the first five years of my life, but then she moved out, went to college, got a job, and got engaged. You know, all that shit. But, she never knew what happened at home when she wasn’t there. The only one that ever did was Alex. I never told Jack, my best friend and who I trusted with my life, what went on. I was scared what Jack would do if he really knew the truth.
Even though Jack was a goofball, he was very protective; very much “older brother” protective. We had been friends since grade school, and even then he was protective. He would kick and bite the boys at school that would pick on me. Needless to say, he got sent to the principal quite a bit. I recall one time in high school he bit someone when they were teasing me. Alex wasn’t very happy about that, and complained every day that there was still a scar on his arm.
Alex somehow convinced me to stay at his place until I got back on my feet, and he also somehow convinced me to go to my sister’s, just to tell her I was okay. Alex told me he’d come with me for moral support, and I thanked him. I cleaned myself up best I could before we headed over to my sisters place. I sat in the car, rather nervous about having to face my sister. Alex gave me a reassuring look, and I finally got out of the car. I looked up at my sister’s house and took a deep breath. Alex walked up next to me, taking my hand in comfort. I looked over at him and smiled. We both walked up the steps and I knocked sharply on the door. We stood there a moment, before the door opened, revealing my thirty-five year old sister, her hair tied up in a tight pony tail. She was also carrying an infant that was about five months old. She recognized Alex right away, but it took her a moment to recognize me.
“Hi Kris.” I said.
“Jillian, what in God’s name are you doing here?” she asked me.
“I’m not allowed to move back?” I asked. Kris studied me a moment before letting Alex and I inside. Her house was small, and it was nothing compared to Alex’s house, but it was cozy. My sister led us to the living room and we all took a seat. We all sat in silence while my sister studied over me. “So, what’s my niece’s name?” I asked when the tiny child made a noise.
“Theresa.” Kris smiled at me. I smiled back. I got up from my seat and walked over to my sister, holding out my arms to hold Theresa. Kris smiled at me and handed my niece off to me. Theresa kind of squirmed for a moment, but soon she was playing with my hair. “I don’t ever remember your hair being that colour.” She told me.
“It’s kind of a new thing.” I told her, bouncing back and forth on my feet slightly. “Be glad I didn’t go through with the dreads.”
Kris kind of smiled at me. Then we were silent, until Theresa giggled at something. Kris looked at me again, “So, why are you back here?” I told her everything, excluding the part about me hitch-hiking, because Kris would lob my head off if I told her that. “Where are you staying?” she asked.
“She’s staying at my place for now.” Alex piped up. Kris looked over at him, almost forgetting he was there.
“Thank you Alex. I appreciate it.” She smiled at him. “Jill, you know I’d let you stay here if you needed it.” I only nodded at her.
“I know you would. It’s just your husband I have problems with.” I said.
“Caleb is not that bad.” Kris said. I walked over to her, handing Theresa back to her when Theresa started squirming.
“Well, he doesn’t like me.” I said.
“He does too.”
“Has he ever willingly talked to me?” I asked. Kris only sighed at me. She really didn’t like getting involved in family conflict. Which is probably why I didn’t tell her about what our, or really, her, dad did to me growing up.
Kris would call me every second day or so just to see how I was doing. She invited me over to dinner a couple of times, as well. I mostly stuck to the spare bedroom in Alex’s house, unless I went outside for a smoke break.
While I was having a smoke break one day, Alex and Rian had left for grocery shopping. I sat outside on the front step, watching cars drive by. One particular car stopped in front of the house, and I knew it wasn’t Alex’s, because he would have driven into the garage. When the person got out of the car, I dropped my cigarette on the ground. His skunk patterned hair was unmistakable. I slowly stood up, and when Jack noticed me, he stopped. He looked like he didn’t know what to do. Eventually, he took cautious steps towards me. When he was a good foot or two away from me, he finally spoke.
“Jillian?”
Shit.
My relationship with my dad was never the strongest of relationships. My dad blamed me for a lot of things going on his life. He blamed me for why he lost his job, his drinking problem, and of course he blamed me for my mom leaving him. The only reason my sister got along with him was because she was his biological child. I was the product of a one night stand between my mom and some stranger she had known for a total of three hours. It also didn’t help my case that my dad didn’t like my friends. Every time Jack would come over, my dad would just glare at him over his newspaper. And when he would leave, that’s when it would get bad.
My sister was thirteen years older than me, so she was rarely around. She was there for the first five years of my life, but then she moved out, went to college, got a job, and got engaged. You know, all that shit. But, she never knew what happened at home when she wasn’t there. The only one that ever did was Alex. I never told Jack, my best friend and who I trusted with my life, what went on. I was scared what Jack would do if he really knew the truth.
Even though Jack was a goofball, he was very protective; very much “older brother” protective. We had been friends since grade school, and even then he was protective. He would kick and bite the boys at school that would pick on me. Needless to say, he got sent to the principal quite a bit. I recall one time in high school he bit someone when they were teasing me. Alex wasn’t very happy about that, and complained every day that there was still a scar on his arm.
Alex somehow convinced me to stay at his place until I got back on my feet, and he also somehow convinced me to go to my sister’s, just to tell her I was okay. Alex told me he’d come with me for moral support, and I thanked him. I cleaned myself up best I could before we headed over to my sisters place. I sat in the car, rather nervous about having to face my sister. Alex gave me a reassuring look, and I finally got out of the car. I looked up at my sister’s house and took a deep breath. Alex walked up next to me, taking my hand in comfort. I looked over at him and smiled. We both walked up the steps and I knocked sharply on the door. We stood there a moment, before the door opened, revealing my thirty-five year old sister, her hair tied up in a tight pony tail. She was also carrying an infant that was about five months old. She recognized Alex right away, but it took her a moment to recognize me.
“Hi Kris.” I said.
“Jillian, what in God’s name are you doing here?” she asked me.
“I’m not allowed to move back?” I asked. Kris studied me a moment before letting Alex and I inside. Her house was small, and it was nothing compared to Alex’s house, but it was cozy. My sister led us to the living room and we all took a seat. We all sat in silence while my sister studied over me. “So, what’s my niece’s name?” I asked when the tiny child made a noise.
“Theresa.” Kris smiled at me. I smiled back. I got up from my seat and walked over to my sister, holding out my arms to hold Theresa. Kris smiled at me and handed my niece off to me. Theresa kind of squirmed for a moment, but soon she was playing with my hair. “I don’t ever remember your hair being that colour.” She told me.
“It’s kind of a new thing.” I told her, bouncing back and forth on my feet slightly. “Be glad I didn’t go through with the dreads.”
Kris kind of smiled at me. Then we were silent, until Theresa giggled at something. Kris looked at me again, “So, why are you back here?” I told her everything, excluding the part about me hitch-hiking, because Kris would lob my head off if I told her that. “Where are you staying?” she asked.
“She’s staying at my place for now.” Alex piped up. Kris looked over at him, almost forgetting he was there.
“Thank you Alex. I appreciate it.” She smiled at him. “Jill, you know I’d let you stay here if you needed it.” I only nodded at her.
“I know you would. It’s just your husband I have problems with.” I said.
“Caleb is not that bad.” Kris said. I walked over to her, handing Theresa back to her when Theresa started squirming.
“Well, he doesn’t like me.” I said.
“He does too.”
“Has he ever willingly talked to me?” I asked. Kris only sighed at me. She really didn’t like getting involved in family conflict. Which is probably why I didn’t tell her about what our, or really, her, dad did to me growing up.
Kris would call me every second day or so just to see how I was doing. She invited me over to dinner a couple of times, as well. I mostly stuck to the spare bedroom in Alex’s house, unless I went outside for a smoke break.
While I was having a smoke break one day, Alex and Rian had left for grocery shopping. I sat outside on the front step, watching cars drive by. One particular car stopped in front of the house, and I knew it wasn’t Alex’s, because he would have driven into the garage. When the person got out of the car, I dropped my cigarette on the ground. His skunk patterned hair was unmistakable. I slowly stood up, and when Jack noticed me, he stopped. He looked like he didn’t know what to do. Eventually, he took cautious steps towards me. When he was a good foot or two away from me, he finally spoke.
“Jillian?”
Shit.