What's a Little Vertigo

"Have you told him yet?" Matt asked as we made our way down the busy Vancouver city streets. I sighed and shook my head, desperately wanting to drop the subject. "Megan it's been a month," Matt said warningly. "You need to tell him. There's only four weeks left until you go away. You can't just leave him hanging."
I inwardly groaned. A month back I had received my acceptance letter from the University of Columbia, Chicago, and I really did not know how to tell Josh that I would soon be moving over 2000 miles away.
Breaking the news to my parents had not been a fun experience; I know for a fact that they will not be supporting my decision in any way, financially or emotionally. They also made it known that they did not approve of my relationship with Josh. My Dad openly stated that he 'would rather chew on broken glass, than see our relationship progress any further.' So to say that we are on bad terms right now, would definitely be an understatement.
"Why are you so afraid of telling him?" My brother questioned as we entered one of the many stores that lined the streets.
"I don't know Matt. I'm not afraid of Josh being unsupportive. I just don't want him to get hurt or upset."
"I understand him being a little upset, but why would he get hurt?"
"He might think that I want to end things. I mean, I'm moving 2000 miles away, Matt. It's going to be hard to keep a stable relationship when I'm in Chicago and he's here." I explained, picking up a keychain from one of the racks in the isle.
"Do you want to end things?"
"No, definitely not." I said, twirling the keychain around my fingers.
"Then I don't see a problem, Megs." Matt said, glancing around the store in search of something interesting. "It's not like you won't be coming home for breaks or during the summer."
I sighed and ran my hand through my hair. "Matt, can we just drop it?"
"No, Megan, we can't. Seriously, what do you plan on doing? Telling him in August, when he comes over and sees all of your shit packed? Or are you just hoping he won't notice?" Matt pushed his hair back and rolled his eyes. "Look Megs, all I'm saying is that you need to tell him. He has the right to know."
I frowned, knowing that Josh wouldn't like the fact that I'd been keeping this from him for so long. He also wouldn't be happy that he was the only person who didn't know.
"I'll tell him soon Matt. I just need a little more time." My brother scowled at me and shook his head in frustration.
"You're digging yourself a hole Megs, and pretty soon you aren't going to be able to get out of it."

"Josh, I'm bored. Can we please go do something?"
"Yeah, just give me a few minutes," Josh said, not even bothering to pull himself away from whatever he was doing. I groaned and rolled onto my back, staring up at Josh's bedroom ceiling.
"What are you even doing?" I asked the boy, who was stationed at his desk, scribbling in his notebook.
"Working on a new song. We are so close to being signed, I just need to tweak our sound a little bit more." I slowly sat up and crossed the room, so that I was positioned behind Josh. Resting my chin on his shoulder, I read a few of the lyrics that were scrawled across the paper.

That one stings a little,
I'm always in the middle.
I don't expect, but try me,
And you will always find that from here,
This is where I scream from.

"I like it. All of your songs are so personal. You're really talented."
"Thanks, Baby Girl." I smiled and moved so that my cheek was rested on the top of his head.
"Josh?" I questioned softly, closing my eyes and inhaling the scent of his shampoo.
"Hmmm..?"
"Can you promise me something?"
"What is it?"
"Don't lose yourself." I heard Josh, place his pen down before he shifted and moved his chair to face me.
"What do you mean by that Megs?" He asked while gently pulling me into his lap.
"I have no idea what the future holds. I can't tell you for certain that we are going to be together in 5 years…or you will be signed to a label in 6 months… whatever it might be. But I want you to promise me, that even if we aren't together, you aren't going to let anything go to your head; that you are going to be the same sweet, caring, funny guy, that you are now."
Josh smiled softly before leaning forward and pressing his lips against my own. "I have something I want to give you," he told me as he pulled away. Wrapping his arms underneath my legs and behind my back, he stood up and carried me over to his bed, gently setting me on top of the covers. "I was going to wait for your birthday, but I would rather give it to you now."
I watched my boyfriend as he walked over to his closet and reached up onto the top shelf, pulling a bag down from behind the endless t-shirts and sweatshirts that seemed to accumulate inside the small area. He walked back over to me, pulling a box out of the bag and setting it in my lap as he sat down beside me.
"I know we've only been dating for like three months, but I liked the story behind the necklace Matt gave you. So don't freak out, okay?" I looked at him curiously, before shifting the box in my hands. "Open it." Josh told me with a nod of his head.
Turning the box back over, I pushed the lid up. Inside was a bracelet with a small heart charm. "Do you like it?"
I smiled and nodded, feeling tears sting at my eyes. "It represents something similar to Matt's necklace. I want you to know that no matter what, I'm always going to be there for you. Even if I become some rockstar, or if we are in the middle of a huge fight. Whenever you need me, I'll be there in a second."
"Josh, this is so sweet." I told him, gently placing the box on the bed and wrapping my arms around his torso. "Much better than the birthday present I got you."
Josh laughed and kissed the side of my head.
"Are you kidding? I had a blast at the Foo Fighters concert." he exclaimed. I giggled and rolled my eyes.
"Way to ruin the moment Ramsay." Josh chuckled and fell backwards onto the mattress, pulling me with him.
"It's what I do best baby girl, it's what I do best."