On The Ledge
ten - i'm letting go tonight
Wide Awake - Katy Perry
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"It was so great having you here for a little while" Deborah said wrapping her arms around James, "And it was nice meeting you as well Olivia. You seem to have brought out a different side of James these past few days" Liv smiled and graciously accepted the hug from her. They both said their goodbyes and the door shutting behind them caused a silence and they never said a thing until they got into the car.
"Thank you for asking me to come" Liv said about half an hour into the drive. She was getting anxious and the urge to say something finally let loose.
"I'm glad I asked you, I knew there was a reason I brought you" he stopped himself and shook his head staring out at the road.
"And what reason is that?" she reached into her purse and slipped on her black Ray Bans as the sun began to break through the clouds. He glanced over at her for a moment and she smiled big, teeth and all, causing him to laugh.
"So?" she inquired again, he paused for a moment and like a lightbulb flicked on in his head he responded, late, to her question, "For a little while I forgot about Summer"
It made her a little nervous that she was the reason he was feeling that way, even though he made her forget about Mark for a little while too. Her eyes slipped down to the phone in her lap and she ignored yet another call from him. That was twelve missed calls since they had gotten to Ontario.
"Well I'm glad I could do that for you" his smile lit up his face and those pesky butterflies worked their way into her stomach again. She hoped he didn't see her blush.
The drive was better this time than it was on the way up but they also knew alot more now then they did on the way up. Without hesitation they revealed themselves entirely to each other and that made things a bit more serious. There was no question Liv liked the way James hair looked different every time she looked at him because he ran his hand through it so much and the way he tugged at his pants when he was embarassed, like at all the family stories she heard over the few days; his blue eyes that looked green in the light and the smile that lit up his face and everyone's around him. Wait a minute...
She looked over at him again and now everything floated through her head at once and she came to terms with the fact that she liked him. Alot.
"Damn it" she said it louder than she had planned and James raised an eyebrow and glanced over, "Are you okay?" he asked.
Now that she had realized her feelings even his voice sounded different, "Yah, I'm good" she said nodding, a little too many times.
He smirked, "Okay, if you say so"
He knew he had some kind of feelings for Liv but he was hesitant to face them. He wasn't about to rush into something after what had happened with Summer, especially since he hasn't had closure with her yet. That should be fun he thought.
Yet he now found her humming along to her music calming rather than irritating and he liked the way she smiled in her sleep and although he was happy she felt so comfortable that she could take her shoes off and stick her feet up on the dashboard, he wasn't particularly fond of that. And even though her eyes were almost always hidden behind some kind of glasses, usually sunglasses, they always glittered the perfect color blue, like the ocean at sunset.
I do like her he thought, Too much, too soon
The drive was silent except for a couple exchanges as they took a couple rest stops. His car stopped in front of Liv's, finally, and Liv sighed with relief knowing very soon that she'd be hitting the pillow of her own bed. She coudln't wait.
"I had alot of fun James" she said slipping her sunglasses onto her head, "Your family was amazing"
"They seemed to love you, like I said they would" she just smiled in response and nodded, "Well, I'll see you soon I guess"
"Do you need help with your stuff?" he asked reaching to his seatbelt and pulling it off.
She shrugged, "Sure"
They both stepped out of the car and he popped the trunk while Liv shut the passenger door behind her. She threw one bag over her shoulder and grabbed her leather suitcase with both hands, "Again, thank you" she said. He nodded and before she could realize it, she leaned in and kissed him on the cheek, staying up on her toes for a moment before setting her feet flat on the ground.
"Coffee some time soon?" he asked, "You know...for your article?"
Her eyes went wide and she slapped her hand on her head, "I have two days to finish that and I didn't do any work while we were away"
"So that coffee tomorrow then?" the smile slowly appeared on her lips and then she finally responded by nodding her head, "I'll call you" he nodded once in response and leaned in to kiss her cheek when she heard the front door of the house open behind her and he took a step bck, "My girl is bck in one piece!" Sidney said raising his arms, "You took good care of her I see" he said stepping down to meet them both by the car.
"Seems that way" Liv replied, "Want to make yourself useful and carry this for me?" she handed him the suitcase and smiled. He rolled his eyes and carried it into the house ahead of her, "See you tomorrow" Liv said before quickly turning away and entering the house.
Liv shut the door behind her and Sid leaned against the doorframe of the hallway and stared at her, "What?" she said letting out a sigh.
"You two must have had a good trip" she saw a mischievous smirk appear on his face and she took a step back, "Woah! Not that friendly!" she said in reply, "We're friends. We've become...better friends"
He narrowed his hazel eyes and moved a bit closer, "You know I've become really good at being able to tell when you're lying"
"And I've become really good at being able to tell when you're bluffing" she crossed her arms over her chest and they both stood their ground.
"You like him"
"And what if I do?" she asked. He shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets, "Nothing, I just enjoy when I'm right. You know it doesn't happen very often" she smacked him out of the way and he let out a laugh before she disappeared into her room.
--
The entire way home, James passed through every moment in his head from the drive there to the drive home and where he was now. Her scent, her eyes, her laugh, it all seemed to twist around his head without warning. When he fell for Summer, he had a choice because he knew--or thought--she was different than the others. Liv just showed up, unexpected and landed herself into his head. He couldn't get her out if he tried. And he tried.
Arriving home felt relieving. The stress of the weekend felt like it lifted off his shoulders the moment he returned to peace--somewhat. He was looking forward to a quiet house.
But we don't always get what we want.
He stepped into the door but before he could shut it behind him he heard a car door shut and then a voice called out.
"Jay?" he knew the voice, he was just having a hard time believing it. He turned around slowly and cleared his throat. Her chocolate brown hair in bouncy curls, her blue eyes a little bloodshot with tear stained cheeks, "Summer" he said, "What are you doing here?"
"I told you on the phone that I--"
"You didn't come to the wedding"
"You went with someone else"
He raised an eyebrow and slightly shook his head, "How did you know that?"
"So it's true"
"Excuse me? You lost all your rights to be able to care who I spend time with when you walked away, for someone else" he snapped.
She shrugged and tugged at the hem of her shirt, "I still care about you Jay, I--"
He shook his head and held in his composure, so he wouldn't cause a scene, "You never cared!" his voice raising, "You walked away from me remember? You chose someone else over me. So excuse me if I don't believe a word coming out of your mouth"
"I got scared"
"Of what?"
She moved forward and took his hand but he didn't flinch, he just blinked once and swallowed, "Of what?" he repeated.
"How I felt. How fast everything was moving and I was upset, you were gone on a road trip and--"
"That doesn't excuse what you did Summer" he slowly pulled his hand away, "Why did you come here?"
"I want another chance" he took a step back and shook his head, "And why would I do that?"
"Because I know you still love me"
He shook his head, "Not after what you did"
She nodded, "Yes you do"
"I need you to get off my property, now"
"Jay, please"
"Don't call me Jay" he said with a shake of his head, "You lost that entitlement too. Now leave, and I don't want to see your face again"
She didn't reply and she didn't persist. She wiped a stray tear away and turned away as he shut the door behind him. He took in a few breaths and slid down against the door, running a hand through his hair and then lightly banging his head against the door, resting it there.
She never did have good timing, ever he thought to himself. He stood up and locked the door. He went into the kitchen and opened cupboard after cupboard while dishes shattered against the floor and his anger flew out of control. He opened the fridge and rummaged through it and through any other cupboard for anything with alcohol while glass crunched underneath his feet.
"No more Summer" he told himself, "Not anymore"
_________________________________
"It was so great having you here for a little while" Deborah said wrapping her arms around James, "And it was nice meeting you as well Olivia. You seem to have brought out a different side of James these past few days" Liv smiled and graciously accepted the hug from her. They both said their goodbyes and the door shutting behind them caused a silence and they never said a thing until they got into the car.
"Thank you for asking me to come" Liv said about half an hour into the drive. She was getting anxious and the urge to say something finally let loose.
"I'm glad I asked you, I knew there was a reason I brought you" he stopped himself and shook his head staring out at the road.
"And what reason is that?" she reached into her purse and slipped on her black Ray Bans as the sun began to break through the clouds. He glanced over at her for a moment and she smiled big, teeth and all, causing him to laugh.
"So?" she inquired again, he paused for a moment and like a lightbulb flicked on in his head he responded, late, to her question, "For a little while I forgot about Summer"
It made her a little nervous that she was the reason he was feeling that way, even though he made her forget about Mark for a little while too. Her eyes slipped down to the phone in her lap and she ignored yet another call from him. That was twelve missed calls since they had gotten to Ontario.
"Well I'm glad I could do that for you" his smile lit up his face and those pesky butterflies worked their way into her stomach again. She hoped he didn't see her blush.
The drive was better this time than it was on the way up but they also knew alot more now then they did on the way up. Without hesitation they revealed themselves entirely to each other and that made things a bit more serious. There was no question Liv liked the way James hair looked different every time she looked at him because he ran his hand through it so much and the way he tugged at his pants when he was embarassed, like at all the family stories she heard over the few days; his blue eyes that looked green in the light and the smile that lit up his face and everyone's around him. Wait a minute...
She looked over at him again and now everything floated through her head at once and she came to terms with the fact that she liked him. Alot.
"Damn it" she said it louder than she had planned and James raised an eyebrow and glanced over, "Are you okay?" he asked.
Now that she had realized her feelings even his voice sounded different, "Yah, I'm good" she said nodding, a little too many times.
He smirked, "Okay, if you say so"
He knew he had some kind of feelings for Liv but he was hesitant to face them. He wasn't about to rush into something after what had happened with Summer, especially since he hasn't had closure with her yet. That should be fun he thought.
Yet he now found her humming along to her music calming rather than irritating and he liked the way she smiled in her sleep and although he was happy she felt so comfortable that she could take her shoes off and stick her feet up on the dashboard, he wasn't particularly fond of that. And even though her eyes were almost always hidden behind some kind of glasses, usually sunglasses, they always glittered the perfect color blue, like the ocean at sunset.
I do like her he thought, Too much, too soon
The drive was silent except for a couple exchanges as they took a couple rest stops. His car stopped in front of Liv's, finally, and Liv sighed with relief knowing very soon that she'd be hitting the pillow of her own bed. She coudln't wait.
"I had alot of fun James" she said slipping her sunglasses onto her head, "Your family was amazing"
"They seemed to love you, like I said they would" she just smiled in response and nodded, "Well, I'll see you soon I guess"
"Do you need help with your stuff?" he asked reaching to his seatbelt and pulling it off.
She shrugged, "Sure"
They both stepped out of the car and he popped the trunk while Liv shut the passenger door behind her. She threw one bag over her shoulder and grabbed her leather suitcase with both hands, "Again, thank you" she said. He nodded and before she could realize it, she leaned in and kissed him on the cheek, staying up on her toes for a moment before setting her feet flat on the ground.
"Coffee some time soon?" he asked, "You know...for your article?"
Her eyes went wide and she slapped her hand on her head, "I have two days to finish that and I didn't do any work while we were away"
"So that coffee tomorrow then?" the smile slowly appeared on her lips and then she finally responded by nodding her head, "I'll call you" he nodded once in response and leaned in to kiss her cheek when she heard the front door of the house open behind her and he took a step bck, "My girl is bck in one piece!" Sidney said raising his arms, "You took good care of her I see" he said stepping down to meet them both by the car.
"Seems that way" Liv replied, "Want to make yourself useful and carry this for me?" she handed him the suitcase and smiled. He rolled his eyes and carried it into the house ahead of her, "See you tomorrow" Liv said before quickly turning away and entering the house.
Liv shut the door behind her and Sid leaned against the doorframe of the hallway and stared at her, "What?" she said letting out a sigh.
"You two must have had a good trip" she saw a mischievous smirk appear on his face and she took a step back, "Woah! Not that friendly!" she said in reply, "We're friends. We've become...better friends"
He narrowed his hazel eyes and moved a bit closer, "You know I've become really good at being able to tell when you're lying"
"And I've become really good at being able to tell when you're bluffing" she crossed her arms over her chest and they both stood their ground.
"You like him"
"And what if I do?" she asked. He shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets, "Nothing, I just enjoy when I'm right. You know it doesn't happen very often" she smacked him out of the way and he let out a laugh before she disappeared into her room.
--
The entire way home, James passed through every moment in his head from the drive there to the drive home and where he was now. Her scent, her eyes, her laugh, it all seemed to twist around his head without warning. When he fell for Summer, he had a choice because he knew--or thought--she was different than the others. Liv just showed up, unexpected and landed herself into his head. He couldn't get her out if he tried. And he tried.
Arriving home felt relieving. The stress of the weekend felt like it lifted off his shoulders the moment he returned to peace--somewhat. He was looking forward to a quiet house.
But we don't always get what we want.
He stepped into the door but before he could shut it behind him he heard a car door shut and then a voice called out.
"Jay?" he knew the voice, he was just having a hard time believing it. He turned around slowly and cleared his throat. Her chocolate brown hair in bouncy curls, her blue eyes a little bloodshot with tear stained cheeks, "Summer" he said, "What are you doing here?"
"I told you on the phone that I--"
"You didn't come to the wedding"
"You went with someone else"
He raised an eyebrow and slightly shook his head, "How did you know that?"
"So it's true"
"Excuse me? You lost all your rights to be able to care who I spend time with when you walked away, for someone else" he snapped.
She shrugged and tugged at the hem of her shirt, "I still care about you Jay, I--"
He shook his head and held in his composure, so he wouldn't cause a scene, "You never cared!" his voice raising, "You walked away from me remember? You chose someone else over me. So excuse me if I don't believe a word coming out of your mouth"
"I got scared"
"Of what?"
She moved forward and took his hand but he didn't flinch, he just blinked once and swallowed, "Of what?" he repeated.
"How I felt. How fast everything was moving and I was upset, you were gone on a road trip and--"
"That doesn't excuse what you did Summer" he slowly pulled his hand away, "Why did you come here?"
"I want another chance" he took a step back and shook his head, "And why would I do that?"
"Because I know you still love me"
He shook his head, "Not after what you did"
She nodded, "Yes you do"
"I need you to get off my property, now"
"Jay, please"
"Don't call me Jay" he said with a shake of his head, "You lost that entitlement too. Now leave, and I don't want to see your face again"
She didn't reply and she didn't persist. She wiped a stray tear away and turned away as he shut the door behind him. He took in a few breaths and slid down against the door, running a hand through his hair and then lightly banging his head against the door, resting it there.
She never did have good timing, ever he thought to himself. He stood up and locked the door. He went into the kitchen and opened cupboard after cupboard while dishes shattered against the floor and his anger flew out of control. He opened the fridge and rummaged through it and through any other cupboard for anything with alcohol while glass crunched underneath his feet.
"No more Summer" he told himself, "Not anymore"