On The Ledge

Ed Sheeran - A Team

Liv woke up and found herself wrapped around James. He was sleeping soundly and she jumped up in a panic and stood beside the bed. He groaned and opened his eyes and shook his hand through his hair, "Where's the fire?"

She had never slept in the same bed with anyone since being with Mark. She had no problem with it, but she didn't understand how she ended up that close to him.

"How did I--what did I do last night?"

He just shrugged, "You were completely out, tossing and turning and then all of a sudden you just...wrapped your arm around me"

She adjusted her ponytail and then tightly crossed her arms across her chest, "I'm sorry, you should have just shoved me away, I wouldn't have noticed"

He shook his head, "I didn't mind, it's the first time I slept through the night" there was that gut feeling again so she cleared her throat, "Well, I'm going to go get dressed"

He dove across the bed and grabbed her arm, "Bad idea"

She raised an eyebrow, "Why?"

"My entire family will be up there. And based on what you're wearing--not that it's bad or anything--but you're coming up from my room and I just--let me go up first" she chuckled at the nervous look on her face and shook her head.

"Can I at least borrow pants?" she asked, "In case they still catch me?"

He smirked, "Yah, of course" he searched through his bag and tossed a pair on the bed that she slipped on over her shorts. They looked at each other for a moment and then the sound of Deborah coming down the stairs broke them from their thoughts.

"Shit" he mumbled walking around the bed.

"James, are you up?" she asked.

He opened the door and sighed, with Liv standing behind him with red cheeks and her eyes to the floor. They both knew it looked worse than it was and his mother just sighed, "Oh...well..."

"Mom, it wasn't anything--she just--she couldn't sleep"

"You don't need to explain yourself, breakfast is upstairs...with everyone else" she turned around and they listened as she reached the top of the stairs. He cleared his throat and turned around, "I'm sorry" he said, "I really didn't think she would come down"

She bit her lip and shrugged a little, "It happens"

"Well I suppose there's no use hiding now...breakfast? My mom's breakfasts are awesome"

"Sounds amazing"

Breakfast was pretty quiet but she could hear whispering and see nudges exchanged between Neal and his brothers. She felt eyes on her every now and then and found herself only picking at her food. She glanced at James and he gave her a small smile. She felt a little better, but not any more hungry.

Finally James' father broke the silence and got people chatting and then James' sister Rebecca spoke, "Liv, how about you come upstairs with me and I'll help you get ready?" Liv looked over at James who barely budged, but a small smile still appeared, reassuring her. But before she even had a chance to object or agree, Rebecca grabbed her hand and dragged her up the stairs to the spare bedroom.

"Okay, the wedding is outside, and it's obviously a gorgeous day out. What did you bring?" she asked. Liv sighed and set one of her bags up on the bed. Rebecca looked through it and pursed her lips, "Although I'm a bit younger, we look about the same size, because you're honestly not that tall. Let me see what I can find, I don't mind you borrowing something"

"Don't make a huge deal out of it. I'm sure I can--"

"Nonsense" she replied, "You need to look adorable" before Liv could object again, Rebecca disappeared and Liv sat down on the bed with a long breath. A few minutes later she appeared in the room with a simple floral dress with pink and white flowers and lace around the top of it. She had a grey cardigan hung over her arm and light pink flats in her hand.

"Here" she said laying it out on the bed, "It's not too formal for being a guest, it's nice"

Liv looked it over and she was still not partial to the idea. She was not one for dresses, but it was a wedding. She forgot that she would have to dress up for the occasion.

Rebecca circled around Liv and sat her down on the bed, "We have to do something with this hair" she said running her hands through it, "Up or down?"

Liv just shrugged, "I don't do my hair very often. I like braids though...maybe just a braid?"

"Yes!" she said, "Perfect! I have a flower you can put in there too"

"Really?" she felt like she was being pampered, and although it was nice, she still felt like she was imposing.

"It would look so cute, James will just--"

"Wait, what?" Liv stood up and crossed her arms, "What did he say?"

"Nothing" she said shaking her head, "But you oggle him every time you see him, and he isn't exactly subtle when he's looking at you either" Liv suddenly felt nervous and she shook her head, "No, that's impossible. We're only friends"

"You came up from his bedroom last night"

"I couldn't sleep" she replied, "I...slept next to him, that was it"

"I believe you" she said, "But I think there's more that you're refusing to see"

"Do you not have to get ready?" Liv asked as a way to avoid the subject. She liked James, but a relationship was not something that even crossed her mind with everything that happened to both of them.

"My hair appointment is in an hour with the other bridesmaids, and I have a dress I have to wear" she said, "So I'm set. Just sit down" she said patting the bed, "I won't talk about him anymore, I promise" Liv sighed and sat down in front of Rebecca while her hands ran through her hair, "All the guys will be falling all over you, trust me"

"Guys don't fall all over me"

"Well today they will"

She left for her appointment and Liv was left with her hair braided around the back and down her neck. A pink flower sat on the right side of her head. Rebecca also did her makeup, which wasn't much then Liv did already, except a little more eye makeup brought out her blue eyes. She had the door shut and she paced the guest room, staring down at the dress. She wanted to just wear her own clothes and not dress up, but then she would look even more out of place than she already felt. She couldn't bear the eyes on her. Finally she slipped on the dress, cardigan and shoes and looked in the mirror.

She felt different now, and that scared her a little. She didn't understand why, but she thought James might think of her differently, she didn't need anything more complicated. "Liv?" there was a knock on her door and she noticed it was James on the other end. She paused for a moment and took a deep breath and looked in the mirror one last time, "You can come in"

She heard the door open and could sense his eyes on her. She was afraid to turn around and face him because of what he might say, "Don't laugh"

"I would never do that"

She slowly turned around and his eyes widened slightly and he took one of his hands out of his pocket and rubbed the back of his neck a bit nervously and smiled, "You look--"

"Ridiculous, I know" she sighed falling down on the bed, "Your sister just--"

"You look pretty Liv"

She looked up in surprise and then finally noticed him. She knew what he looked like in suits, she saw it all the time at the rink but something about this moment and the way his dress shirt wasn't fully buttoned, enough to see a glimpse of his chest and he still had no tie on. The way he had his hands shoved in his pockets nervously and his hair looked perfectly messy. His eyes were bluer than she'd ever seen them.

"You look amazing" she said amidst the awkward silence, "Really great"

"Thanks" he replied. They were both silent for a moment before James spoke again, "There's still food downstairs, if you're hungry"

She shrugged, "I'm not"

"Well...come sit outside maybe?"

They both sat outside on the porch and were still silent, looking out at the massive backyard his family had. Liv had a few pieces of watermelon and strawberries on a paper plate, and she barely picked at them.

"I'm not forcing you to eat if you're not hungry Liv" he said. She set her plate down beside her and rested her elbow on her knee and her head in her hand, "Can I ask you something?" she asked as her eyes still stared out across the grass, "Sure" he replied.

"Can I ask her name?"

He shifted uncomfortably and took a breath, "I thought we weren't going to--"

"Just a name"

"Why?" he asked raising an eyebrow. She finally turned her face towards him and lightly shook her head, "I don't know, I guess I shouldn't have asked. I'm sorry"

"Summer" he said, "Her name was Summer"

The name sounded familiar to her but she never thought anything of it and cleared her throat, "I'm sorry, I guess I just wanted to put a name to what happened"

"It's fine"

"Mark" she replied, "His name was Mark"

He didn't reply and Liv regretfully shook her head, wondering why she constantly kept putting herself into that position.

"Maybe we shouldn't get into this, this should be a happy day, am I right?" she smiled now and that gut feeling James had every time she smiled returned and he tried to ignore it, "Definitely" he said nodding his head.

"How fast are you?" she asked.

"Excuse me?"

She shrugged, "Can you run fast?"

"Why?"

"Because I guarantee you I can beat you to that tree swing" she said pointing to the other end of the yard. He looked at her for a moment and shook his head. How does this girl go from depression to happiness so quick?

"So?" she slipped off her shoes and walked down the couple stairs of the porch onto the grass. She stared at him in anticipation and shrugged, "As long as I don't ruin this suit" he said taking off the tux jacket. She smiled big again and bit her lip and before he could even count down, she was off and he quickly ran after her. But he couldn't catch up and she touched the tree before he stopped and leaned over to catch his breath, "You're fast" he said.

"Not really, I did run track in high school though, but it's been years" he looked up at her and shook his head with a laugh, "I still find it hard to understand you Liv"

She leaned up against the tree and took a deep breath, "You're not so easy to read yourself" she said, "But smiling more would definitely help your mood I think" although what she wanted was just to see more of his smile.

"Race you back?" he asked. She nodded and he ran off before her this time but she managed to catch up and still beat him back to the porch. They met Nick and who I guessed was Michael, the one Neal brother I hadn't met, on the porch laughing, "She beat you both ways Jay" Nick said with a chuckle.

"Even you got the head start the second time" Michael chimed in and James leaned over for a breath, "Give her credit" James replied, "Plus I just play hockey" she chuckled at his remark and gave him a small smile.

"So this is the girl the boys have been telling me about?" Michael said stepping down onto the grass, "I've heard good things" he said reaching out his hand.

"I hope so" she smiled, "You must be the husband to be"

He nodded once, "That's me. And you're his date?" Liv felt her cheeks go red and she shrugged, "I guess you could call it that"

"Look James, she's blushing" Michael said nudging his brother. James kept his eyes in another direction and grabbed his jacket, "I'll be inside" he said brushing past Nick and going inside.

"He's been through alot" he replied, "Probably went a bit overboard with that"

Liv gently shook her head, "Yah, maybe. Maybe you should talk to him?"

"I'd rather talk to you" he said, "About him"

Nick left and went inside and Liv found herself by herself with James' younger brother. She kept her hands in front of her and her eyes downward, "I don't know him that well yet"

"Do you know what happened?" he asked.

"We promised we wouldn't talk about it. And when he wants to...he will"

He nodded, "Fair enough. So why are you here? It hasn't been that long. Why did he ask you?"

"I never asked why he asked me. I just felt like he shouldn't be alone"

"So you know what happened then?"

"Not in detail. Just that she found someone else. I guess he thought I would understand" she moved away and sat down on the steps and he followed, sitting beside her, "The same thing happened to me...kind of. I just wasn't enough"

"So you and him connect?"

"I don't know. Ever since I first saw him I could see something in his eyes, like he was broken. I guess I just know how he feels"

"I can see you look at him a bit differently now, don't you?"

She didn't answer him, she just stood up, "I think we're done"

"Liv, I'm sorry"

"It's fine. I'm just not prepared to talk to anyone about whatever this is" she stepped inside and brushed past James in the process and went upstairs to the guest bedroom and lied across the bed.

About an hour later of staring up at the ceiling she heard a knock against the doorframe and she sat up and faced Neal, "We're leaving for the church" he said. He was dressed fully now, tie and all. She kept herself in check and cleared her throat, "I'll be right behind you"