Another World

Tons of questions filled my mind as I got ready for Liam's birthday party. Would I run into Zayn? Should I talk to him? Do I ignore him? Would he even want to talk to me?

I shook away my thoughts and impatiently fixed the strap on my heels. Granted, they were a bitch to put on, but they looked so badass and extremely cute. I walked in on Kate finishing her conversation with Harry, something about hoping "it" will go as planned. My suspicions were surfacing but it was Kate, she wouldn't do anything I would have to kick her ass over.

"Harry said everyone's there already, so..." Her voice trailed, waiting for me to react.

"Everyone?"

She placed her hands on my shoulders and gave me a reassuring smile. "You can do it."

I took a seat on our kitchen table.

"I just have a bad feeling about tonight,"

Kate brought over a glass of wine to calm my nerves as she sat down next to me. Bless her, she knew wine was my favorite and I was definitely in need of it.

"I feel anxious." I tried to get rid of the feeling but it refused to go away. "Tell me something to distract me, please, I'm desperate."

She thought about what to say. "Okay, so you noticed Harry has been coming here a lot more often." I nodded in response. "Well, I was somewhat considering him living with us."

I opened my mouth to speak but she repeated, "Somewhat considering." Afraid that I would say something negative.

"Don't you think that's a little soon?"

"It's not like he's going to be here all of the time. I mean he does go on tour and what not so, technically, he won't really live with us, he'll just live with us."

I looked at her, questioning if she even understood what was just said. "Hey, as long as he doesn't eat my ice cream, I'm okay with it."

"I haven't even talked to him about it. It's just something that came up in my mind."

"Do you think he'll want to?"

She furrowed her eyebrows. "I don't see why he wouldn't."

"I'm just saying."

"Great, as if I wasn't hesitant about it already."

"That's good, you need a lot of time to think about it anyway. It's a big decision."

She sucked her teeth and stood up from the chair. "Did that distract you enough?"

"Thanks for reminding me." I followed her as she headed for the front door.

"You can't hide from it forever."

We took a taxi to the club - unfortunately neither of us still knew how to drive yet - and as we got closer, my heart beat increased.

"Do you think Liam would notice if I snuck a few sips of the bottle we bought him?"

As we arrived, Kate gave me a supporting thumbs up and stepped out of the car.

I took in a deep breath before entering. "Why did I let you talk me into this?"

"Because you can't resist my persuasive words."

"Yeah yeah, so drinks on you?"

She chuckled as she walked down the long hallway towards the open double doors. "You got it."

Slowly my ability to hear anything else other than loud music was becoming scarce. The security on each side intimidated me until Harry came out and had a laugh with one of them. He walked up to Kate and reached down to give her a kiss.

I decided to apologize to him for my behavior a couple of weeks ago when I found out about the lie Edward told.

"You had every right to be upset and I'm very sorry if I offended you in any way."

Kate wrapped her arm around his small waist, giving him an approving kiss on the cheek. "She's kind of on edge." She explained to Harry who caught me nervously playing with my nails.

"Zayn said he isn't attending," He said with a shrug. "Probably still bothered about the whole thing and a bit sensitive towards Liam, you know."

A part of me was relaxed but the other was let down. I guess I really wanted to see him. These confusing emotions were starting to get under my skin.

Harry led us inside the dim lit room, taking our jackets away as we found a nicely decorated booth. I was looking around and saw Liam smiling his handsome smile at his guests. I felt like I was on autopilot, getting up and heading towards him.

"Happy birthday, Liam!" I yelled into his ear over the music.

"Thanks, Val!"

As I handed him a birthday card and bottle I stood on my tip toes to speak in his ear. "It's a funny one!" I exclaimed while pointing to the card. "And I know you don't drink much, but Kate and I didn't know what else to get you!"

"Aw, you didn't have to!" He grinned. "Bringing yourself is enough!"

I felt my face get hot. "Yeah well we couldn't arrive empty handed!"

"I heard you weren't going to make it, but I'm glad you decided to come!"

Before I could respond, Kate came up to us, giving Liam a birthday greeting and a hug. He told us he had to go attend to his guests so we gave him a smile, wishing him a happy birthday once more.

"How awkward that must've been!" Kate blurted after he was gone.

"Not as awkward as I thought it was gonna be!"

Her smile faded as she leaned towards me. "You might want to have a drink or two!"

I was ready to question her suggestion but was cut short when I saw the only long, skinny guy I knew who would wear sunglasses at night. He gave Liam a smile and said happy birthday. It was as if we both had a radar on each other because the minute I noticed him, he noticed me. All these feelings were coming back, mixed with anger and frustration. I was overwhelmed and felt like I had to get away.

I sped walked out of the room, passing Zayn in the process, and reached the end of the hall. Turning a corner, I wanted to be hidden from everyone else without having to get out of the building.

Leaning against the cold marble wall, I began questioning myself. Now that he was here I didn't know if I actually wanted him to be here. I wasn't able to prepare myself mentally because of a curly headed twat who told me that he wasn't coming. As I looked down, a pair of shoes stood in front of me.

"Are you okay?" Kate asked as she leaned on the wall next to me.

"I didn't think he'd show up, and to see him," I shrugged. "It just caught me off guard is all."

"Are you planning on talking to him?"

"Hell no!"

She put her hands up defensively. "Alright, but you know I think you should."

"Well for the sake of my emotions, I won't."

"If you think avoiding him is actually going to help you, guess again."

I remained quiet, I knew she was right. I didn't have the courage to go up to him knowing that there was a great amount of tension between us, so I chose to do what anyone else in my situation would do.

"Didn't you say drinks on you?"

She laughed, "Coming right up."

When Kate returned with two shots in her hands, I couldn't help but chuckle as she handed me one. We were in a hall, drinking, basically having our own party.

"I must be ruining the night for you. Go inside and have fun, I'll be fine."

She shook her head. "I'm staying right here until you feel better. Or at least until you're ready to go back in."

"We must look super antisocial if you ask me."

After a couple more shots, I felt like I could go and face Zayn. I went into the bathroom that was at the end of the hallway. It was empty since everyone used the ones that were inside of the actual club.

I fixed my hair and make-up, shamelessly practicing my walk just to make sure I didn't fall or look like I was drunk - even if I was.

I confidently went passed the security, through the doors, and strut my stuff. Making sure that Zayn was looking, I smirked at the guy next to him. Just a little I-know-you're-watching-me-Zayn-so-I'm-going-to-look-at-other-guys-to-make-you-jealous kind of smirk. I knew it wasn't right, but it made me feel better.

I went over to Kate who was on her phone.

"Harry left you for his guy friends I see."

"You know how he is. That boy knows the whole world, I can't keep up with him."

We laughed and talked to people we met sitting at the booth in front of us. They were two years older, aspiring dancers who had the funniest jokes to tell.

"I can't believe my nineteenth birthday is coming." I told Kate when everyone went to get a drink.

"Did you figure out what you want to do yet?"

"I think a nice little get together at our flat would be fine."

"Come on, that sucks! This is your first time not being in New York for your birthday, do something different for once!"

I rolled my eyes. Of course she would disagree and I was expecting every word that came out of her mouth. I wasn't the type to go all out on anything and that was my problem according to Kate.

In the middle of the party, she practically dragged me out to the front of the building. Something about her phone dying and that she needed to use mine.

"It's a bit cold out." I stated as a gush of cool wind whipped through my hair.

She seemed to have been distracted. Looking around her almost every second.

"Aren't you gonna make that call?"

"Oh, right." She replied with a shaky chuckle. It was like she was stalling, waiting for something to happen.

"I'm actually getting a bit more comfortable and relaxed," I admitted to her. "For once having some fun without him and enjoying my time being single."

She frowned as footsteps came from behind me. The minute I heard Harry's voice talking to the person next to him, I knew what this whole "needing my phone" thing was all about.

"Yeah you can only smoke right here, that's the, um, rules-- Oh, hi girls! What a coincidence seeing you two out here." Harry, hon. Don't quit your day job.

I looked over at Kate who handed me my phone back. She was going to be hearing an earful when we got home. But there he was, standing, looking just as confused and victimized as I was at that moment with his hands in his pockets. There was an awkward silence, one hand moved up to the back of his neck as he rubbed it, a sign that he was uncomfortable. I waited for Kate to shift her gaze at me in order for me to give her the death glare. I wasn't drunk enough to handle this shit.

"I'm gonna go, uh, get a drink." I lied.

"Um..." I looked at Harry who was pointing at the small cup of liquor mixed with juice I was holding.

"This one is actually finished," I said after taking big gulps until it was gone. "So, yeah I'll see you guys inside."

"Valarie, come on--"

I put a hand up at Zayn. "Don't." My voice cracked.

Making my way back, I felt like knocking someone out. What were they thinking trying to set us up? Blindsiding me like that. Did they really think it was going to work? I bumped into Liam who was having the time of his life until he noticed me.

"Are you okay?" His lips read. Oh Liam, he shouldn't even care about anything, or anyone, but himself. It was his birthday and yet he was making sure that I was okay. I gave him a forced smile and nodded, I didn't want him to worry about me. It was my fault that his relationship with Zayn was on a tight rope and more than anything I wanted to fix it. I was ready to apologize about it all but stopped short, it definitely wasn't the time to bring up any drama.

He leaned in and whispered, "I'll give you a piece of cake if you want."

My eyes lit up, ready for him to lead the way. Cake makes everything better, everyone knows that. He stepped into an open room where the large batman cake was surrounded by plates, cups and spoons. He cut a piece from the back so that no one would notice and handed it to me before giving himself a piece.

"To the birthday boy, may all your wishes come true." We raised our spoons while I toasted. As we ate the delicious cake, the guilt refused to go away. "I just wanted to say how sorry I am about the whole accusations thing. I feel like it's all my fault that you and Zayn aren't the same."

He swiped the air with his hand, disagreeing with my apology. "We'll be fine soon enough. We can't stay mad at each other for long, don't worry about us."

"I can't help it."

He sighed. "I did fancy you a bit in the beginning, but you and Zayn..." He trailed off, having trouble finding the words. "Just don't give up on him so easy, okay? He's crazy about you."

"He definitely has a great way of showing it."

Chuckling, he continues, "Although he is massively stubborn, you know that once you get past that you find a kind-hearted lad. Don't tell him I told you that, it'll ruin his bad boy image." He joked.

I stared at him, if Liam was my boyfriend I wouldn't have to go through any kinds of drama. But you can't choose who you end up with because the heart wants what the heart wants. "They must be looking for you."

His eyes widened as if he forgot about everyone else. I gave him a hug as a thank you for the cake and let him get back to his party.

Finally, I was calm and actually having a good time. I was trying to have a nice conversation with someone but Zayn constantly turning to look at me kept distracting me. I finally had enough and glared at him. He kept his gaze as if it was some sort of staring contest. To say he pissed me off would be an understatement. My phone began to vibrate in my hand. I downed one last shot and headed to the neglected bathroom.

I could feel the liquor I had consumed in the last two hours take its toll on me as I walked towards the end of the hall. I listened to the voicemail my brother left, asking when I'd be going to visit the family because everyone missed me and blah blah I wasn't really paying attention, realizing that I had to pee really bad.

I didn't know I was being followed until the door opened and closed behind me as I washed my hands. It was Zayn and he seemed to stumble a bit as he entered. He just looked at me, sadness in his expression slowly changing to a serious mood.

"What gives you the right to be upset with me?"

I stared at him in disbelief. "You can't be serious."

He rolled his eyes. "What do you think?"

I groaned, tired of the same arguments. "Why can't you just admit that you were wrong?"

"When you admit that you were wrong!"

"Oh, grow up, would you!"

"You grow up!"

"You're such a fucking dick!"

"Call me whatever you want but that still doesn't give you the right to be mad at me." He took a step closer. "You broke my heart."

"I didn't do anything. You accuse me of things I didn't even do, and the worst part of it is that you chose to believe someone else's lies other than the truth."

"That's not true." He stated quietly, he knew he was wrong. When was he going to own up to it?

"It's not true that you didn't believe me?! Which hurt like hell!" I wiped the tears that constantly fell. "I was the one who stayed with you, believed you over the media when those rumors came about. Yes, I doubted you in the beginning, just like you did to me, but the difference between us was that when I let you explain yourself, I took your word for it. Unlike you."

I was ready to walk away when he grabbed my arm.

"Get the fuck off of me! You don't deserve to touch me!" I quickly was out of his grasp and slapped the sunglasses right off of his face. He hissed, gripping my shoulders.

"I hate you!" I repeated hysterically.

"No you don't!"

The personal space was limited. "Let me go!"

"No!"

I broke free and reached for his face again to strike, but he grabbed my wrist and brought me closer to him, pressing his lips roughly onto mine. At first I resisted until his grip loosened and fell onto the side of my hips, forcing me onto him. The mixture of his cologne and liquor was effecting the way my brain functioned.

He slammed me against the bathroom door and locked it. He began kissing my neck, mumbling about how much he missed me as his hands found the zipper at the back of my dress. I knew I missed him but I didn't realize how much until I had him in my arms again.

"And you're going commando?" He let out a whimper followed by an ass grab.

By the time I could process it all, I hadn't realize that my dress was already around my ankles. I kicked my dress to the side as I ripped open his blue denim button up shirt, revealing new tattoos that wasn't there before, new spots I had to kiss and trace with my tongue.

I threw my bra on top of my dress. Zayn didn't hesitate to grope my now exposed breasts, he constantly stated how much he loved them when we were together and he wasn't afraid to mention it once more.

He lifted me up and placed me on the marble counter of sinks. He tried to take off my heels but I slapped his hand away. That would take ages and we clearly didn't have all day.

"I don't want you to hate me anymore." He slurred, his thick accent was strong as he pulled down his pants and boxers.

"I could never hate you." I heard myself say.

The amount of noise that echoed in that bathroom. Let's just say we were very thankful that the music was at a high volume because so was I.

As we rested, catching our breath, an unanswered question slipped into my brain once again. Where did this put us?

We went our drunken separate ways back to our friends, not speaking a word about what had happened while we were gone.