The Dream Journal.
Too much.
Once again as i entered dream state i found myself in a house that crops up quite a lot in my dreams, I've never mentioned it before because usually when my dream starts in this house, the entirety of the dream just involves walking around it. But this time was a bit different.
...............................................................
I've never seen the outside of this house, i always materialize in a large room with a very high ceiling, burgundy, dusty carpets run throughout. Through most of the house, instead of staircases, there are just wooden ladders up to different floors and alcoves, the whole building is a twisted layout of perhaps a huge family home.
I was back again, in what i now thought of as my dream home, not because i wanted a home like it, but because, literally it is where i seem to live when i close my eyes.
I padded around the soft carpet, greeting various people as i went, people that i seemed to know, and yet i had no idea. Ladders and ledges and alcoves and cracks. Carrying on down the longest ladder, to the very bottom of the building, there reside huge forgotten and found, stone halls with arched ceilings. These halls were obviously around before the rest of the house was, often there is children running around the expanse of the place.
This time, just off to the side of the group of children, a young man sat on the floor, lounging against the wall. I recognized the black, spiky hair and facial piercing. I could see that his mind was elsewhere, then just after stubbing out his cigarette on the cold floor, he noticed me. He shouted "hey", and started walking methodically towards me, narrowing the distance between us, his footsteps echoed on the stone. "Amber"... this shocked me, there were never any names in my dreams, ever, least of all my own. I wasn't even me in my dreams, i just played an anonymous character.
I knew i didn't like this boy, i didn't know why but something about him didn't resonate well with me. Just as he stopped in front of me, staring expectantly, i bolted. I didn't know where i was going, i didn't want to be in the house anymore.
In seconds i was outside in front of what i assumed to be the house, from the outside it didn't look like anything strange, or grand, or anything. It was a downtrodden looking terrace house...,the same as any other on the street. There was a plain blue bike conveniently placed against the wall near the door. Instinct told me it was mine, but i didn't remember placing it there.
The boy was on his way up the stairs to the front door as i was getting on the bike, "Amber, wait"...I didn't wait. I cycled like a demon on speed down the road, i could see the sea from here, and the coastal path at the bottom of the hill, running all the way to the next town. He was still chasing me when i turned around, trying to get my attention. I was peddling madly now, down the hill towards the pathway.
As i turned my attention back to the road in front of me i saw a small, quick blur of auburn fur. I passed it off as nothing until i realized i was skidding down the hill sideways, still on the bike, the bloody tail of a squirrel spinning in the spokes. This all happened in a matter of seconds, but it felt like hours. The barriers that fenced off the pathway from the sea were coming closer and closer into view, i turned around and caught the boys distraught face as the bike hit the barrier...,and i left the bike.
I felt nothing as my body took flight, and entered the bottomless blue. Sinking and sinking, i watched the sky drift further away. In the distance i could hear the faint splashing of someone wading into the sea, closer, shouting my name but my lungs were screaming from the lack of air and i was losing the battle of consciousness. I felt strangely at peace,
floating,
steadily
down,
into the darkness.
...............................................................
I've never seen the outside of this house, i always materialize in a large room with a very high ceiling, burgundy, dusty carpets run throughout. Through most of the house, instead of staircases, there are just wooden ladders up to different floors and alcoves, the whole building is a twisted layout of perhaps a huge family home.
I was back again, in what i now thought of as my dream home, not because i wanted a home like it, but because, literally it is where i seem to live when i close my eyes.
I padded around the soft carpet, greeting various people as i went, people that i seemed to know, and yet i had no idea. Ladders and ledges and alcoves and cracks. Carrying on down the longest ladder, to the very bottom of the building, there reside huge forgotten and found, stone halls with arched ceilings. These halls were obviously around before the rest of the house was, often there is children running around the expanse of the place.
This time, just off to the side of the group of children, a young man sat on the floor, lounging against the wall. I recognized the black, spiky hair and facial piercing. I could see that his mind was elsewhere, then just after stubbing out his cigarette on the cold floor, he noticed me. He shouted "hey", and started walking methodically towards me, narrowing the distance between us, his footsteps echoed on the stone. "Amber"... this shocked me, there were never any names in my dreams, ever, least of all my own. I wasn't even me in my dreams, i just played an anonymous character.
I knew i didn't like this boy, i didn't know why but something about him didn't resonate well with me. Just as he stopped in front of me, staring expectantly, i bolted. I didn't know where i was going, i didn't want to be in the house anymore.
In seconds i was outside in front of what i assumed to be the house, from the outside it didn't look like anything strange, or grand, or anything. It was a downtrodden looking terrace house...,the same as any other on the street. There was a plain blue bike conveniently placed against the wall near the door. Instinct told me it was mine, but i didn't remember placing it there.
The boy was on his way up the stairs to the front door as i was getting on the bike, "Amber, wait"...I didn't wait. I cycled like a demon on speed down the road, i could see the sea from here, and the coastal path at the bottom of the hill, running all the way to the next town. He was still chasing me when i turned around, trying to get my attention. I was peddling madly now, down the hill towards the pathway.
As i turned my attention back to the road in front of me i saw a small, quick blur of auburn fur. I passed it off as nothing until i realized i was skidding down the hill sideways, still on the bike, the bloody tail of a squirrel spinning in the spokes. This all happened in a matter of seconds, but it felt like hours. The barriers that fenced off the pathway from the sea were coming closer and closer into view, i turned around and caught the boys distraught face as the bike hit the barrier...,and i left the bike.
I felt nothing as my body took flight, and entered the bottomless blue. Sinking and sinking, i watched the sky drift further away. In the distance i could hear the faint splashing of someone wading into the sea, closer, shouting my name but my lungs were screaming from the lack of air and i was losing the battle of consciousness. I felt strangely at peace,
floating,
steadily
down,
into the darkness.