All Is Lost

"Uh... Wow..." I looked down at Alex. "Wait. Why are you sorry? I want some dick in ass action!" I cheered. Alex shook his head and pulled my lips down to meet his. I pushed him onto a bean bag and straddled him.
"Jack... A-Are-"
"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TWO DOING IN MY BASEMENT!?" Rian stormed into the room with a sheepish looking Zack behind him.

I turned myself around and looked up at my angry friend. I blushed and climbed off Alex's lap. Alex started to play with a loose thread on his hoodie and refused to make eye contact with any of us.
"We... It... It was just a kiss Ri, we were just messing around... Honest." Alex jumped off the bean bag and stormed out of the house slamming the doors. I looked at his retreating back and frowned. "What did I do?" I whispered.
"I'll go." Zack left the room and Rian glared at me.

Here comes the abuse. I know he's going to be angry. He always is. He's going to ban me from seeing Alex again. But I need to know what I've done wrong. I have to.
"What are you playing at Jack?" Rian sighed and put a hand on my shoulder. I ducked my head down and felt a single tear drop from my eye. Rian tilted my head up and wiped away the trail of water. "Don't let it happen again. Please Jack, I don't want to see you get hurt." I nodded and looked into Rian's eyes.

I felt his lips against mine in an instant. Unlike Alex's soft passionate kiss, Rian's was desperate. I pulled away from Rian and stumbled backwards.
"Rian! What was... T-that!?" Rian's eyes widened with realisation and he ran from the room leaving me alone and confused.

I shrank down in the corner and let the tears fall. All of them this time. I didn't look up.

Not when the door opened.

Not when I heard Zack's concerned voice.

Not when I felt dizziness over come me.

I didn't wake up as I was carried out of the room curled up in Zack's arms. Tears still streaming down my face even in my unconscious state.

I had to let it out.