Long Live
Chapter 13
Chapter 13-
(8 Months pregnant)
Being that I was now in my last months of pregnancy. I was pissy, achey, tierd and ready to just fucking have this baby already. James did his best at everything that I asked of him, wheather it was cleaning or putting together the crib and stuff. He never once complained and told me if I kept saying sorry after every question hed kill me. But he didn't understand that I hadn't been this helpless since remission almost a year ago. Last night I got a call from my mother telling me that her and my father and brother and james and I were going to dinner tonight and I had no choice. I complained but reluctantly agreed hanging up quickly. James didn't mind. He smiled and told me he'd be there to back me up. Suck up.
I starred in the mirror as I fixed my tight fitted black dress. There was no reason to hide what everyone already knew. I was starred down in public, starred down at the palm woods and now I was to be starred down by my family. But fortunatly for me, my bump was small and not as noticable as other women who were a month away from giving birth. I shuddered at the thought. I fixed my earrings as james emerged from the bathroom fiddling with his tie. I smiled and walked over to him.
“ You look so handsom. I believe the last time you wore a tux was at the benefit concert.” I said fixing his tie, my hands had a slight shake to them. He smiled and grabbed them putting them to his mouth kissing them.
“ babe, relax. Parents love me.” I groaned as he scouffed and handed me my bag.
“ We need a code word. I don't want them to know too much. There nosey people who have shit tons of money.” I said as we walked to the elevator, passing the boys who were heading back from the pool, soaked from head to toe. They made to jump on james but I immediately jumped in front of him.
“ I will effin kill all three of you , if you mess up his hair suite or face.” They all paused and starred at me.
“ Where are you two headed mr. And mrs. Smith?” Kendall asked laughing.
“ Meeting Nolies parents.” james piped up behind me.
“ Have fun grown ups.” Carlos said jokingly as all three boys walked back to 2J. I looked at james who's face looked like he was longing to go with them. I felt bad most days, guilty even. It was like it was my fault that he was no longer a teenager and had to act like a grown up. I sighe and mumbled ' lets go' as we quietly entered the elevator. I was quite on the way to the restaurant, james could tell something was up but I wouldn't dare tell him that I felt guilty from ripping his teenage life from his bare hands. He'd just go off on me for thinking such stupid ideas. He gripped my hand as we arrived.
We were seated at a large table almost smack dab in the middle of place. Of course, all eyes starring down James Diamond and his Pregnant girlfriend. I was so used to the pictures, whispers and remarks I just didn't bother paying attention anymore. Suddenly I spotted my fucked up family from across the room. My father with a blonde who looked about 22, My mother who wore her scowl best and my brother who looked like the only normal of the 4. James hand squeezed mine under the table as they approached us. I hugged my dad and brother and mother as james shook all of there hands. I shook the blondes hand eyeing her with distaste.
“ So your mother tells me that your due in a month. How exciting sweetheart.” My dad said rubbing my hand. I smiled. Okay so I was always a daddys girl , but he was more preoccupied with fighting with my mother over holidays, the after the divorce fighting over custody rights. But he'd always have something sweet to say to me and give me everytime I visited. So I didn't hate him.Just his actions. My brother and me were always close. He was the one id go to when I was upset. But he was a trouble maker so they sent him to military school and hes been different since. More polite, more quiet. He said down in between me and dad. For the first half hour dinner was quiet we ordered and after the bread was gone the fighting commenced.
“ Derek will you please knock some sense into your daughter? Shes living in a peasent appartment, with no maid and no cook.” My mother said rubbing her temples. She knew james was right next to me and I felt him tense up. But my dad always was opposite my mom which meant he was on team James and me.
“ Eva, Your daughter knows whats she's doing, leave her be.” He turned to james. “ So , son what do you for a living.” Fuck. James smiled.
“ Im a musician.” My dads face was expressionless. “ Big time rush?”
“ never heard, are you big?” James nodded.
“ We work with gustavo Raque.” Thank god james knew how to compose himself in front of important people. I secretly thanked kelly for those thousands of interviews they do. “ We've got two albums, out.”
“ Fascinating. And your how old?” My dad rubbed his chin.
“ 19 sir,” He said confidently.
“ Ah, and are you able to provide for my little girl?”
“ As long as Nolie is happy Than so am I. Her and my daughter are my everything sir.” My dad smiled, seeing the scinerity in james eyes.
“ Then I approve.” He said glancing at me.
“ Does anybody care that She has basically thrown her life away?” My mother shot at us. I jumped and both james and Max, my brother, grabbed my hands. “ You people are rediculous. Shes living with a musician for christs sake!” My bother threw down her napkin. No longer caring we were in public. I sighed.
“ Mom please don't-” She glared me down.
“ No. Nolita I will not stop. You are my daughter. I want whats best for you. I want you to have a future! A Bloody Career! YOUR LIVING IN A TWO FUCKING BEDROOM APPARTMENT!”
“ EVA! WILL YOU FOR ONCE SHUT UP! YOUR DAUGHTER IS HAPPY! DO YOU NOT REMEMBER WHERE SHE WAS ALMOST YEAR AGO?” My father echoed to her. My mother shut her mouth. She had no defense in that department. She never called more then once every two weeks to check on me. And she was on vacation. At least my dad offered to pay the bills, and had a cleaning lady for me around the appartment. He called more often then she did.
“ Mother, in all do respect your being a completely close minded. All of her life, Nolita was never good enough for you. You'd make her do things she didn't want, upset her for being different. When she was diagnosed I came back from boot camp to visit her. You barely took one look at her, and now that she is pregnant, you'd like to be apart of her life? Why so you can tell your grandaugther that you were always there for her? If grandma was alive, god rest her soul she would mortified at your behavior. And quite frankly I along with everyone else is as well. James is a nice guy, hes sweet caring and obviously cares about her other wise she wouldn't be here. So I suggest you shut your god damn mouth for once and listen to the people around you.” My brother had opened his mouth for the first time that night and everyone including me and james were gaping at him in shock. My mother stiffened and looked away.
“ Now, Nolie how did you and james meet?” He said looking to me, putting his hand on my stomach. I smiled and told them all our story. Even the blonde on my dads arm was interested.
Dinner ended and we said our goodbyes and James excused himself to talk to my dad as I stayed behind with my brother.
“ Its getting hard to hug you!” He laughed rubbing my back I nodded.
“ Do they always make you wear your uniform?” I asked crossing my arms. He looked down at this Marines outfit and nodded.
“Yeah well, we got free wine! Works everywhere.” I sighed with a smile.
“ You turned 17 a month ago, the last thing you need to do is drink.” He shrugged.
“ Free boos never killed anyone.” He looked at me concerned. “ Whats wrong Noles?” He said crossing his arms.
Even my brother who I hadn't seen a year or so knew something was up. I sighed.
“ I don't know, I just feel bad.” He intently listened. “ I mean james is 19, and he should be doing things teenagers do. When we were younger I was always the mom of the house because our birth mom was never around. And I didn't care I always loved it but, james was an only child. I feel like I ruined what was left of his teenage years. I feel like I made him grow up to fast with this.” I gestured to my Swollen bump. “ I don't regret keeping her, but Im scare james is going to resent me for agreeing to stay with us.” Max walked over to me and lifted my chin so I was now at eye level. I never cried. And now im tearing up in front of my little brother.
“ You are an amazing women Nolita Carlton. Your going to be an amazing mom. And you and james, are more perfect together then any fairytale book you've read to me when me and annie were kids. That man can and will never resent you. You're giving him another reason to love you.” Max bent down and kissed my stomach.
“ Max, when did you become so fucking smart.” I said laughing slightly. He smirked.
“ I learned it from the best.” He kissed my forehead and hugged me goodbye. I watched him leave with my father , the dumb blonde and driver. James walked up to me and looked at me concerned.
“ Are you okay?” He asked examining me.
“ Yeah im fine, hormones and shit. Come on lets go.” I said as we got into the car.
Xxx
We arrived home and I quickly undressed and pulled my hair out of my side bun letting my long black hair fall messly over my shoulders. Ugh. I was so tierd. Walking just makes me exhausted. Suddenly someones arms around my waist and I felt them kiss my neck softly. I smiled.
“ Oh hello stranger.” I said softly putting my hands on his. James laughed into my skin making me giggle. He kissed me up and down my shoulders making my head lawl back. I had been so stressed and pissy the last couple of weeks, we didn't even have sex. He turned me around so I faced him and he picked me up making me wrap my legs around his waist. He laid me on the bed and gently kissed up and my stomach. He put his lips to my ear.
“ I will never resent you.” My eyes widened. He had heard. Of course he heard. That was my luck. “ I love you Nolita Marie Carlton wheather you like it or not.” He kissed my neck as I giggled once more. He pulled me so we were bothing sitting next to each other. He kissed me passionatly as I clawed at his back and he gasped, leaning his head on mine. “ Thats not fair you know I refuse to have sex with you until Shes born.” I bit my lip and sighed. Well that wasn't helpful. He turned my head to look at him. He kissed my forehead and every negitive feeling in my body melted. He was nervous and shaky. I don't know why. But something was more up with him then me. Suddenly He got up and walked to the closet.
“ James what are you-” But he grabbed something and quickly turned to me. He put his finger on my lips and starred into my eyes.
“ I believe in fate. And I believe I wasn't complete until I met you that day in central park. You are my everything and to this day I still carry that list in my wallet. Because I know that if god forbid we should be apart, at anytime. I can still hold you close. And even though you getting pregnant was unexpected, I thank god everyday for being blessed with you in my life.” He grabbed my hands. “ Nolita I love you so much and that will never change. Nolita Marie Carlton....Will you marry me?”
(8 Months pregnant)
Being that I was now in my last months of pregnancy. I was pissy, achey, tierd and ready to just fucking have this baby already. James did his best at everything that I asked of him, wheather it was cleaning or putting together the crib and stuff. He never once complained and told me if I kept saying sorry after every question hed kill me. But he didn't understand that I hadn't been this helpless since remission almost a year ago. Last night I got a call from my mother telling me that her and my father and brother and james and I were going to dinner tonight and I had no choice. I complained but reluctantly agreed hanging up quickly. James didn't mind. He smiled and told me he'd be there to back me up. Suck up.
I starred in the mirror as I fixed my tight fitted black dress. There was no reason to hide what everyone already knew. I was starred down in public, starred down at the palm woods and now I was to be starred down by my family. But fortunatly for me, my bump was small and not as noticable as other women who were a month away from giving birth. I shuddered at the thought. I fixed my earrings as james emerged from the bathroom fiddling with his tie. I smiled and walked over to him.
“ You look so handsom. I believe the last time you wore a tux was at the benefit concert.” I said fixing his tie, my hands had a slight shake to them. He smiled and grabbed them putting them to his mouth kissing them.
“ babe, relax. Parents love me.” I groaned as he scouffed and handed me my bag.
“ We need a code word. I don't want them to know too much. There nosey people who have shit tons of money.” I said as we walked to the elevator, passing the boys who were heading back from the pool, soaked from head to toe. They made to jump on james but I immediately jumped in front of him.
“ I will effin kill all three of you , if you mess up his hair suite or face.” They all paused and starred at me.
“ Where are you two headed mr. And mrs. Smith?” Kendall asked laughing.
“ Meeting Nolies parents.” james piped up behind me.
“ Have fun grown ups.” Carlos said jokingly as all three boys walked back to 2J. I looked at james who's face looked like he was longing to go with them. I felt bad most days, guilty even. It was like it was my fault that he was no longer a teenager and had to act like a grown up. I sighe and mumbled ' lets go' as we quietly entered the elevator. I was quite on the way to the restaurant, james could tell something was up but I wouldn't dare tell him that I felt guilty from ripping his teenage life from his bare hands. He'd just go off on me for thinking such stupid ideas. He gripped my hand as we arrived.
We were seated at a large table almost smack dab in the middle of place. Of course, all eyes starring down James Diamond and his Pregnant girlfriend. I was so used to the pictures, whispers and remarks I just didn't bother paying attention anymore. Suddenly I spotted my fucked up family from across the room. My father with a blonde who looked about 22, My mother who wore her scowl best and my brother who looked like the only normal of the 4. James hand squeezed mine under the table as they approached us. I hugged my dad and brother and mother as james shook all of there hands. I shook the blondes hand eyeing her with distaste.
“ So your mother tells me that your due in a month. How exciting sweetheart.” My dad said rubbing my hand. I smiled. Okay so I was always a daddys girl , but he was more preoccupied with fighting with my mother over holidays, the after the divorce fighting over custody rights. But he'd always have something sweet to say to me and give me everytime I visited. So I didn't hate him.Just his actions. My brother and me were always close. He was the one id go to when I was upset. But he was a trouble maker so they sent him to military school and hes been different since. More polite, more quiet. He said down in between me and dad. For the first half hour dinner was quiet we ordered and after the bread was gone the fighting commenced.
“ Derek will you please knock some sense into your daughter? Shes living in a peasent appartment, with no maid and no cook.” My mother said rubbing her temples. She knew james was right next to me and I felt him tense up. But my dad always was opposite my mom which meant he was on team James and me.
“ Eva, Your daughter knows whats she's doing, leave her be.” He turned to james. “ So , son what do you for a living.” Fuck. James smiled.
“ Im a musician.” My dads face was expressionless. “ Big time rush?”
“ never heard, are you big?” James nodded.
“ We work with gustavo Raque.” Thank god james knew how to compose himself in front of important people. I secretly thanked kelly for those thousands of interviews they do. “ We've got two albums, out.”
“ Fascinating. And your how old?” My dad rubbed his chin.
“ 19 sir,” He said confidently.
“ Ah, and are you able to provide for my little girl?”
“ As long as Nolie is happy Than so am I. Her and my daughter are my everything sir.” My dad smiled, seeing the scinerity in james eyes.
“ Then I approve.” He said glancing at me.
“ Does anybody care that She has basically thrown her life away?” My mother shot at us. I jumped and both james and Max, my brother, grabbed my hands. “ You people are rediculous. Shes living with a musician for christs sake!” My bother threw down her napkin. No longer caring we were in public. I sighed.
“ Mom please don't-” She glared me down.
“ No. Nolita I will not stop. You are my daughter. I want whats best for you. I want you to have a future! A Bloody Career! YOUR LIVING IN A TWO FUCKING BEDROOM APPARTMENT!”
“ EVA! WILL YOU FOR ONCE SHUT UP! YOUR DAUGHTER IS HAPPY! DO YOU NOT REMEMBER WHERE SHE WAS ALMOST YEAR AGO?” My father echoed to her. My mother shut her mouth. She had no defense in that department. She never called more then once every two weeks to check on me. And she was on vacation. At least my dad offered to pay the bills, and had a cleaning lady for me around the appartment. He called more often then she did.
“ Mother, in all do respect your being a completely close minded. All of her life, Nolita was never good enough for you. You'd make her do things she didn't want, upset her for being different. When she was diagnosed I came back from boot camp to visit her. You barely took one look at her, and now that she is pregnant, you'd like to be apart of her life? Why so you can tell your grandaugther that you were always there for her? If grandma was alive, god rest her soul she would mortified at your behavior. And quite frankly I along with everyone else is as well. James is a nice guy, hes sweet caring and obviously cares about her other wise she wouldn't be here. So I suggest you shut your god damn mouth for once and listen to the people around you.” My brother had opened his mouth for the first time that night and everyone including me and james were gaping at him in shock. My mother stiffened and looked away.
“ Now, Nolie how did you and james meet?” He said looking to me, putting his hand on my stomach. I smiled and told them all our story. Even the blonde on my dads arm was interested.
Dinner ended and we said our goodbyes and James excused himself to talk to my dad as I stayed behind with my brother.
“ Its getting hard to hug you!” He laughed rubbing my back I nodded.
“ Do they always make you wear your uniform?” I asked crossing my arms. He looked down at this Marines outfit and nodded.
“Yeah well, we got free wine! Works everywhere.” I sighed with a smile.
“ You turned 17 a month ago, the last thing you need to do is drink.” He shrugged.
“ Free boos never killed anyone.” He looked at me concerned. “ Whats wrong Noles?” He said crossing his arms.
Even my brother who I hadn't seen a year or so knew something was up. I sighed.
“ I don't know, I just feel bad.” He intently listened. “ I mean james is 19, and he should be doing things teenagers do. When we were younger I was always the mom of the house because our birth mom was never around. And I didn't care I always loved it but, james was an only child. I feel like I ruined what was left of his teenage years. I feel like I made him grow up to fast with this.” I gestured to my Swollen bump. “ I don't regret keeping her, but Im scare james is going to resent me for agreeing to stay with us.” Max walked over to me and lifted my chin so I was now at eye level. I never cried. And now im tearing up in front of my little brother.
“ You are an amazing women Nolita Carlton. Your going to be an amazing mom. And you and james, are more perfect together then any fairytale book you've read to me when me and annie were kids. That man can and will never resent you. You're giving him another reason to love you.” Max bent down and kissed my stomach.
“ Max, when did you become so fucking smart.” I said laughing slightly. He smirked.
“ I learned it from the best.” He kissed my forehead and hugged me goodbye. I watched him leave with my father , the dumb blonde and driver. James walked up to me and looked at me concerned.
“ Are you okay?” He asked examining me.
“ Yeah im fine, hormones and shit. Come on lets go.” I said as we got into the car.
Xxx
We arrived home and I quickly undressed and pulled my hair out of my side bun letting my long black hair fall messly over my shoulders. Ugh. I was so tierd. Walking just makes me exhausted. Suddenly someones arms around my waist and I felt them kiss my neck softly. I smiled.
“ Oh hello stranger.” I said softly putting my hands on his. James laughed into my skin making me giggle. He kissed me up and down my shoulders making my head lawl back. I had been so stressed and pissy the last couple of weeks, we didn't even have sex. He turned me around so I faced him and he picked me up making me wrap my legs around his waist. He laid me on the bed and gently kissed up and my stomach. He put his lips to my ear.
“ I will never resent you.” My eyes widened. He had heard. Of course he heard. That was my luck. “ I love you Nolita Marie Carlton wheather you like it or not.” He kissed my neck as I giggled once more. He pulled me so we were bothing sitting next to each other. He kissed me passionatly as I clawed at his back and he gasped, leaning his head on mine. “ Thats not fair you know I refuse to have sex with you until Shes born.” I bit my lip and sighed. Well that wasn't helpful. He turned my head to look at him. He kissed my forehead and every negitive feeling in my body melted. He was nervous and shaky. I don't know why. But something was more up with him then me. Suddenly He got up and walked to the closet.
“ James what are you-” But he grabbed something and quickly turned to me. He put his finger on my lips and starred into my eyes.
“ I believe in fate. And I believe I wasn't complete until I met you that day in central park. You are my everything and to this day I still carry that list in my wallet. Because I know that if god forbid we should be apart, at anytime. I can still hold you close. And even though you getting pregnant was unexpected, I thank god everyday for being blessed with you in my life.” He grabbed my hands. “ Nolita I love you so much and that will never change. Nolita Marie Carlton....Will you marry me?”