Oh My Goodness

I woke around 11 the next morning. As my eyes adjusted to the light, a lazy smile made its way onto my lips. I was in good spirits, that was for sure.

I headed out into the kitchen, grabbing a glass and setting it on the counter. I grabbed the orange juice from the fridge, and my ears instantly perked up. The window was open slightly, and Matt and Gabe's voices were conversing outside. I was about to grab my drink and head out to join them, a smile already on my face, when Matt's words caught my attention.

"So you don't like her?"

My heart jumped.

Were they talking about me? They had to be. I was the only girl here. I set my glass down.

"No." Gabriel. "I swear, man, I don't like her like that. We're just friends."

My heart sank. I felt sick to my stomach, and my vision blurred. I was frozen in place as the pair grew silent, only finding the will to move when they began to speak again. I didn't want to hear anymore.

Was I stupid, or naive? Had I imagined the gazing, the touching, the smiles? Or had I just made them out to be something completely different than what they were? I felt ashamed and embarrassed. I hurried back to my room, and made it seem like I hadn't gotten up at all.

I lay in my bed for hours. When Matt came to check on me, I convinced him that I didn't feel well, and that I just needed sleep. He believed me and left me on my own, but there was no way I could fall asleep with the thoughts running through my head.

Why was I so upset? He was just a boy.

But I knew that wasn't true. He wasn't just a boy... He was Gabe. My friend Gabe. The ridiculously good-looking Swede who spoke English like he had grown up in North America, and who really didn't go through girls like everyone thought he did. The guy who had made me fall for him without even realizing it - because he just did that. He smiled, he laughed, he listened, he made you feel special without trying - and you fell. Hard. Because that's who he was. He didn't even have to try.

When Matt came in around 3:00 to tell me they were going to spend the afternoon in town, I tried to decline, but he insisted that the air would be good for me. On the way there, I sat up front beside Matt, and barely spoke a word. I could feel Gabriel looking at me from the backseat, but I refused to look at him. At first, he would try to include me in the conversation, but I would simply mumble "mhm" as an answer, and he eventually gave up. I felt as though I was causing tension, but I couldn't bring myself to even look at him. It was either play the cold front, or break down.

When we got to town, we pulled into the parking lot of a restaurant. I had to admit, the town was cute, and it was lit up from the holiday that had just passed. It was nice.

Almost as soon as we got through the door, the guys were recognized. I took a seat at our table, and smiled as I watched Matt and Shane interact with a little girl and her family. My eyes wandered a bit farther, and I held back a deep sigh.

I watched Gabe as he spoke to a little boy, kneeling down and signing his hat. My heart broke. I had really, really liked him. He laughed loudly at something the kid said, and I felt my lip begin to tremble. I excused myself and hurried off to find the bathroom. I sat in the stall, trying to compose myself. I felt absolutely ridiculous. Was I actually doing this right now? This was pathetic.

I headed back out, making a beeline for Matt, who was at the table now, looking at the menu.

"Hey!" He smiled when he saw me. "I was wondering where you went."

"Bathroom," I tried to say with an easy smile, but when his grin faltered, I knew I had failed at faking. "Look, Matty, I need to go for a walk. I'll be back, wait for me, okay?"

Matt raised an eyebrow. "I can come with you-"

I shook my head quickly. "No," I said a bit too harshly. "No," I repeated, more gently this time. I looked down. "I need some air. I'll be okay. I'll stick close, I promise."

Matt was analyzing my face when I looked up. He looked like he was about to say something else, when a voice spoke from behind me.

"I'll go with you."

I tensed up immediately, and slowly turned around. I met Gabe's eyes for a brief second, and immediately felt like I had been punched in the stomach. "No," I said desperately. "No, I don't want you to." The way his face fell sent another punch in my stomach's direction. "I'm going alone," came my final, quiet words as I turned on my heel and left. As I pushed through the door, I felt tears welling up in my eyes.

How could I be mad at him? He didn't have to like me. But I couldn't help it. Facing him with a smile just couldn't happen.

***
Gabe

She was upset with me, and I had no idea why. I racked my brain for answers, and found none. At least, no logical ones.

Was it because I had kissed her cheek? I thought that was a sure sign that I liked her. Had I been reading the signs all wrong?

On the way back to the chalet, she made sure she didn't sit next to me again. She sat on the other side of Shane in the back, and stared out the window without a word. No one bothered to try to engage her in conversation, and when we got back, she disappeared into her room.

I paced my own room for a long time, trying to figure out what to do. If I had done something wrong, I wanted to know what. After I was certain everyone else had gone to bed, I crept across the house to her room.

When I opened the door, she didn't even look up. I thought maybe she was sleeping, but the light beside her bed was on, and I knew she couldn't sleep with any light. She had told me that before.

I carefully shut the door, and I heard her shift. She had sat up a bit, and when her eyes met mine, they widened a bit before she lay back down and looked away.

I made my way over to sit at the foot of her bed. I was cautious as I spoke. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine."

My eyebrows shot together, perplexed. "Any better?" I questioned slowly.

She heaved a big, frustrated sigh. "I'm fine."

I paused, debating what to say next. "Are you upset with me?"

Silence.

"What did I do?" I was frustrated. At her, at me for not knowing.

***
Jess

"We're friends, aren't we? Don't I get to know what I did?" He was frustrated now. I could feel the emotion building up in my chest.

"Friends, yeah." I laughed bitterly, shaking my head. I was stupid. So, so stupid. I threw back the covers, surprising him, and stood up.

Gabe was silent for a minute. I could almost feel his frustration disappear, and be replaced by confusion. "Am I missing something here?"

"I'm just... I'm just stupid, Gabe." I turned to face him directly for the first time since he had come into my room. His eyebrows were knitted together, and I laughed sadly, biting down on my lip. I looked down; I couldn't look at him any longer. "I just... I thought you liked me. As more than just a friend," I blurted. I paused, feeling ridiculous. My heart was racing a hundred miles per hour. I couldn't believe these words were coming out of my mouth. "This sounds so childish but I swear I... I guess I was just imagining things, and I'm so..." I let out a quiet, sad laugh. "Embarrassed." I shook my head and turned to face the window. "How stupid of me to even think it was possible for you to care about me that much," I finished, my voice quiet.

I stood, my back to him, staring out at the snow falling. I knew he was near me, and I could hardly stand it.

All of a sudden, I felt Gabe's hand on my arm. Within seconds, he had spun me around. With one little tug, he pulled me into him, and was kissing me.

Everything stopped. My heart, my breathing, my ability to think straight. The sensation of the kiss spread all the way down to my toes. Gabriel's lips were pressed to mine firmly, urgently, but gently. His hands found my waist as he opened his mouth to kiss me again.

He broke the kiss gently, and I let out a shaky breath. His hands rested on my waist, and we remained close together, our chests nearly touching. I could hardly breathe. I had imagined kissing Gabe so many times before, but that had been... Even more incredible than what I could have ever pictured.

My eyes stayed closed as I tried to steady my heart. It was quiet except for the sound of our heavy breathing; it almost satisfied me that he seemed to be having just as much trouble catching his breath as I. I was incredibly confused and overwhelmed. It took a moment before Gabriel spoke.

***
Gabe

I kissed her. It was the only thing I could think of doing.

I could tell she was surprised at first, but she didn't pull away. My hands fell to her waist, and I pulled her to me as close as I could. I felt her relax, and so I kissed her again.

When I pulled away, she kept her eyes closed. I tried to catch my breath as I pulled her closer, resting my forehead against hers.

I had kissed her.

Adrenaline was pumping through my veins, and I gently lifted my hand to rest on the side of her neck. I stroked the skin there with my thumb, and took a deep breath.

***

Jessica

"You have no idea," he said breathlessly, leaning his forehead against mine and shaking his head back and forth before continuing, "How much I care."

His voice was low, and it sent shivers down my spine. His hand was on my neck, and his thumb was tracing gentle circles. His breath against my face reminded me of what had happened seconds before. With him this close to me, it was impossible for my body to settle. After a moment, I lifted my forehead off of his and looked down.

He was quiet, and I could tell he was thinking. "Why would you even think for a second that I didn't care?" He finally spoke, lifting his other hand to my face
and running his thumb across my cheek.

I shrugged and bit my lip, enjoying the feel of his fingers on my skin. "Well, I thought maybe you did," I began quietly. "Then I heard you talking to Matt, and..."

***
Gabe

"What?" I was completely lost.

She looked up at me, and I silently urged her to continue. "Earlier, outside... You said you didn't like me that way, and I was so confused because last night and-"

I pulled her into me as tight as I could. I had the tiniest smile on my face, and was grateful that she couldn't see. I buried my face in her neck, and she hugged me back just as tight. I pulled back enough to gently run my thumb across her cheek. "I was talking about a girl that I know Matt likes. We see her all the time when we fly out, she's a flight attendant," I explained. She still didn't look convinced, and I continued, "Matt thinks she likes me-" I saw her face falter, but I shook my head. "It doesn't matter, Jess, because I don't like her." She looked down, and I used my fingers to gently lift her chin up. I made sure she was looking at me as I whispered, "I like you."