I'm Just a Kid Who Tried Too Hard

Do you remember your first day of high school? Do you remember sitting alone in your Science class when your teacher paired you up with the boy who was also sitting on his own?

“Hi, My name is John.” said the nervous voice from beside me. I looked up to see a boy with light brown hair sticking his lanky arm out in front of him. I shook his hand as I said “Katelyn” In the quietest voice. He gave me a quick smile before we both turned to the front to face the teacher.
“Katelyn.” I heard him quietly repeat to himself making my cheeks go slightly red.
“Now… the person sitting on your table with you will be your lab partner for the rest of the year. I will not tolerate switches for any reason, so learn to love them.” The teacher said walking back and forth through the rows of students. My hand gripping my pen was becoming clammy. The teacher walked over to the board writing the word DNA up in big letters.

“Your homework tonight is to write everything you know about DNA down.”
Everybody in the class groaned in unison. Except for John and I who merely sat in awkward silence

The sound of the bell echoed throughout the halls. I quickly swooped up my bag from the ground and started to leave before John’s voice spoke up from behind me.
“I’ll see you around Katelyn.” John said as he pushed in his chair. I smiled nodding my head in response before I sped out of the door.

---

I pulled my lunch out of my bag after I had sat down on a bench. I looked around seeing nothing but groups of friends. It was horrible moving to a town as small this one. Everyone had known everyone since they were born…everyone except me.
I kept my head down as I heard footsteps moving closer to me.
“So I’m guessing you are about as new here as me,” A voice said. I lifted my head to see John standing there with his bag slung awkwardly over his shoulder. I nodded my head as he sat down next to me.
“I moved from Arizona a couple of weeks ago” He said pulling out his lunch. “You?”
“Boston” I said in almost a whisper. He looked up at me with a smirk on his face.
“You don’t talk much huh?” he said amused.
I shook my head “But you do.”
John let out a laugh.
“Well then we’ll get along just fine!”
A smile grew on my face. Maybe this place won’t be so bad afterall, I just made my first friend here.


Do you remember that time in 10th grade when you came down with a really bad flu? Do you remember how your best friend skipped school to keep you company?

I groaned as I rolled over. My head was pounding and every part of me was aching.
My mother had just left for work, leaving me home alone. I started falling back asleep until I heard the sound of tapping coming from my window. I scrunched up my face and opened one eye blocking out the sunlight. I smiled when I saw a lanky boy with a goofy grin balancing on the roof at my second story window holding a grocery bag and two Starbucks coffees.
Quickly, I walked over and let John inside. He sat down on the floor emptying the contents of the bag on my floor. I sat on my bed as I watched him.
“I heard you were sick, so I’ve brought supplies.” He said grinning up at me.
I laughed “Shouldn’t you be at school?!” he shook his head.
“School can wait! I’m not letting you rot here on your own. If you’re dying than I’m dying” He said winking. I laughed as he lifted up some DVD’s that he had brought.
“Firstly, we have a bunch of 80’s movies. I know how they make you feel better,” John said holding them in the air.
“Secondly, we have coffee. Caramel latte for you and a Cappuccino with a billion sugars for me,” I moaned as he handed me my coffee making him laugh.
“And lastly, a whole lot of chocolate because I saw them in the shops and I had to buy them all” He said drooling over the chocolate.
“Thanks John. You are seriously the greatest person on the planet.” I said leaning over to hug him.
“I know.”

John and I quoted every line as we devoured our way through the chocolate.
“I really appreciate this Johnny” I spoke up after the last movie had stopped playing.
John put on his goofy smile “I know you’d do the same for me”
He stood up stretching to pick up all the chocolate rappers. We both froze when we heard the front door open.
“Someone’s home.” I whispered. John ran to the window climbing outside. He turned around blowing me a kiss before he sprinted away.
Within a minute my bedroom door was opened.
“Hey sweetie, how are you feeling?” my mother sang.
I looked over at the empty coffees on the table “A lot better actually” I said smiling to myself.

--

I woke up Saturday morning feeling so much better. I practically bounced down stairs to find my mum on the phone.
“I’ll call you back Jenny, Katelyn just woke up” she said hanging up the phone. I poured myself a glass of juice and sat down at the counter.
“Someone at your school must be spreading around this bug. Jenny just told me that John has caught it and is feeling horrible.”
I looked up as a smirk grew on my face. “Oh that sucks." My mother nodded her head at my remark "I’m just uh going to go for a walk to the park okay?” I said quickly getting up as my mother continued to nod her head
I walked out the front door and started making my way to Starbucks.

“I’ll take one Caramel Latte and one Cappuccino with a whole lot of sugars please” I said smiling


Do you remember when your crush asked you out on a date? Do you remember when they stood you up and you had to call up the one person you could count on?

My hands were shaking from the cold. I clung to my phone as I held it to my ear.
“Katelyn? What’s wrong?” His voice sounded worried. I went to speak but all I could feel was a lump in my throat. I knew that if I started talking I would cry.
“Katie? Sweetie? Where are you? I’ll come and get you.”
I managed to choke out the address before hanging up.
I knew it was too good to be true. Why would someone like him be interested in someone like me? I should of realised it was a joke when he told me to meet him at the beach. He’s probably laughing about it somewhere with his friends.

I sat shivering on the sand clutching my knees to my chest. I happened to be stupid enough to not bring a jacket. I heard the sound of a car door slamming. “Katelyn!” I heard a voice exclaim. I turned to see John sprinting towards me.
“Hey, Why are you out here all by yourself?” He said out of breath. “Didn’t you have a date with the douchey guy?”
I looked up at him with my tears stained cheeks. I didn’t even need to say it.
John’s eyes grew wide with realisation “That son of a bitch! I’m going to kill that piece of shit!”
“John please don-“
“He’s going to wish he was never fucking born.”
I sighed “John stop.” He looked down at me and saw that I needed him now. He sat down in the sand next to me, taking off his jacket and putting it over my shoulders. His long arm was placed around me as I cried into his warm chest.


Do you remember your high school graduation? Do you remember that that was the day your best friend became your boyfriend?

“Kate darling stop fiddling. You look gorgeous” My mother looked me up and down holding her hands to her smiling face. I turned to look in the mirror. My normal long messy hair was curled neatly falling down my back. My usual makeupless face was done up…despite my protest. My mother had bought me a blue strapless dress to wear. As much as I wasn’t looking forward to this social event, I felt really pretty for a change.
“Too bad you don’t have a real date to see how beautiful you look.” I looked up shocked.
“Are you kidding?! John’s taking me! He’s better than any other guy I know” My mother went quiet.

I picked up my purse and walked out of my bedroom. Unlike the usual walk down stairs in movies with people gasping at your appearance I skipped downstairs and walked straight to the kitchen to find John with his head in the fridge.
“Nice ass!” I shouted making him hit his head on the fridge shelf in surprise.
“What the hell Kate?! I could of di-” John turned around to face me. His jaw instantly dropped making me blush slightly. “Katelyn, you look beautiful”
“Thank you, you look pretty good yourself” I said winking. My mother came running in holding a camera. She started crying when she saw us together.

“Mum, please no more god damn photos...we really have to go!” I said yanking John out into the front yard. We walked over to John’s old pickup truck, He helped me get me and my dress into the car.

---

“Oh man, this really blows” John said as everyone danced to horrible music. “Do you want to get out of here?” He turned to face me.
“I thought you would never ask!” I said jumping up taking his hand, practically running out the door.

John turned to me from the driver’s seat “Where to my lady?” I shrugged my shoulders as he twisted the key forcing his pickup truck to grumble. “I have an idea!”

John pulled up in the middle of nowhere and jumped out of his car and over to a wire fence. I followed him with a confused look spread across my face. He picked me up helping me over the fence and jumping over to join me.
“You better not be planning to murder me or something” I said taking his hand making him chuckle.
“Just follow me”

We walked for about 10 minutes. If it wasn’t for the full moon, we wouldn’t be able to see a single thing. John finally stopped walking, smiling at the thing in front of him. I looked up seeing a wooden ladder leading up to a platform.
John and I climbed up onto the top of the platform, he lay on his back putting his hands behind his head which I imitated still confused. Only when I looked up I realised why we were here. There were no clouds in the sky, all I could see was the moon surrounded by stars.
“John…This is beautiful” I whispered.
“I know.” I could feel his eyes burning into my face. “Kate, I kinda wanted to ask you something” I could hear the awkwardness in his voice. I hadn’t heard that since the first day we met. “Well… we’ve finished school now. Everybody is going to be going to college or going to be travelling and I thought I should probably say this before it’s too late.”
I turned away from the stars to face him. Even in the dark I could see the crimson colour his face was going.
“You can tell me anything John, you know that” a serious tone left my mouth.
“I… Uh. Well… Lately...Um”
“It’s okay John, Just tell me” I said holding his hand.
“Kate” He looked me dead in the eye. “I’m in love with you. I’m sorry if you don’t feel the same way or if this now makes things awkward. But I just had to know and I couldn’t bear the thought of you meeting some guy in college and I ju-” I cut of his rambling as I leaned in to kiss him.

Ever since the day in freshman year when he sat with me at lunch I knew I felt something for him and now I knew for sure. I loved John O’Callaghan and I couldn’t bear the thought of not having him in my life.