It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing...

"so the greens signup is next week. " Josh said. I've been home for a few months, and he was in for summer break. 

" no. " Tristian said flatly. I continued to stare at the t.v, my arms wrapped around my knees and my chin resting on them. I felt a hand on my back and I stirred to look up. 

" yeah?" I asked in a tired voice. Josh looked down at me from his seat on the couch. Freddy, frank, tristian, Timmy and him where squished on it, so I had sat in front of josh's feet. We've currently rented some mindless horror movie I'd seen before. 

"are you ok?" he asked lowly. I nodded slightly. 

"just haven't been sleeping." I said slowly. He gave me a concerned look.

" why not?" I shrugged, but I knew. 

When josh was at school, half my time was spent at tristians House- the sleeping time. Almost every night I ended up at his place sleeping.  With Josh here, that wasn't happening, and I hand't been sleeping well. 

"why not?" he asked again.  I shrugged again. " I really don't know."

" Gracie, you know you can talk to me, right?" he said. I smiled at him. " I know, Josh. I'm going to go get a drink. Anyone want one?" I said, loud enough for everyone to hear. Everyone said yes. 

" here, I'll help you get them. I've seen the movie already. " Tristian said, standing and holding a hand out to me. I was surprised, he hadn't talked to me since he showed up almost three hours ago. I took it and he pulled me up, letting me go so I could 
Lead him to the kitchen.  He got cups out mutely as I found the 2liter of soda we had in the fridge. We always had one of every kind of soda. 

" are you sleeping well?" he asked abruptly as I sat the soda on the counter. I shrugged.  " not really. " he gave me a worried look. " do you need to stay over again?" I shot him a surprised look. " I thought you said that it'd be better if we quit that now that Josh was back. " he sighed, leaning on the counter as I concentrated on pouring drinks. 

" yeah, I know I said that. But I can't sleep well, either." he admitted. I smiled at him slightly. " why not?"

" I'm used to waking up to you still sleeping now. I'm used to you randomly sneaking into my room and curling up beside me. "

" oh, I don't do tha-"

"what exactly are you two talking about?" Joshes cold voice said behind me. I felt my eyes widen at Tristian, and his face had gone pale." what did you hear?" I asked slowly. 

" something about you sneaking out to sleep with him!"

" you're right, I did sleep with him. But it was just sleep! Do you really think I'd go around banging anyone anytime soon after what I went through!?" I hissed, annoyed. Now both their faces where pale. 

" Gracie-" 

" you know, it's bad enough that I can't sleep and that I'm-" I cut off for a moment, almost saying something I didn't want to share. 

" the point is, now I'm pissed that you would even think of me doing that. I'm going for a walk to calm down. " I stormed up to my room, ignoring their protests. I searched for a jacket, my door open, so I heard when they both stopped in the hallway. 

" Tristians going with you." Josh said matter of factly. I ignored them, snatching up my hoodie and slipping it on, grabbing my wallet. I walked past them and Tristian fallowed. 

" when are we coming back?" he asked softly as we began walking down the street to the destination in mind. It was a late night cafe that I would often go to. It was 10 now, so it was still open. 

"until I'm no longer Angry at him. What's the green sign up?" I asked to change the subject. He grimaced and was quiet for a long time. 

" it's a singing contest in green, three counties over. Whoever wins gets an album put out. " I gave him a surprised look. 

" why aren't you going to sign up?" 

"because last time I did I got eliminated the first round. " he admitted. I rolled my eyes. 

" how old where you?"

"13." 

"exactly. You're 20 now, you could do it. " 

" it's been seven years. Nothing's changed. " I shot him a glare. 

" I was locked in a basement with a pedophile and a perv and a gay guy who they would get drunk and have rape me for five years and I still came out a better singer. " he pulled me to halt. 

" they had Jaylex do what!?" I grimaced. I'd never told him on purpose. 

" I...er, one night they sedated me. When I woke up Jaylex was there an crying. He said they'd made him drink until he couldn't think straight and blindfolded him, telling him it was a guy they'd taken. " he was quiet for a long time. I wanted to tell him the rest of the story, but I held back. Only three people besides me knew about that. 

" I'm so sorry. You've gone through so much, you make me feel pathetic. " I gasped, spinning so he ran into me and stopped. 

"pathetic!? Tristian, you're the one whose kept me same when I ran to you after a black out! Don't you ever call yourself pathetic!"