Wildflower

My life is literally shit. I have the worst luck. Karma is my best friend. And not the good kind of karma. Me, karma, and bad luck are the three musketeers. We're thick as thieves.

"Don't even speak to me Gavin." First thing that came out of my mouth as soon as I walked into the kitchen. I didn't want to be bothered. I didn't want to teased. I just wanted to be left alone.

"What the fuck did I do?" He bellowed. His arms were thrown up in the air and his eyes grew two sizes bigger. "I didn't even say anything! I didn't even look at you!"

Lulu walked in the kitchen and sat down beside him at the breakfast bar. "She had a bad day yesterday," she explained.

"Why?" He asked, furrowing his brows.

"Because," she replied.

"Because why?"

"Just because."

"Why just because?"

"Because she had a visitor yesterday."

"Who?"

Oh. My. God. Is this twenty questions?! Please don't answer him, Lulu. "Someone she knows."

"Who is this someone? A he or she?"

"None of your beeswax."

"It is a my beeswax because she's my baby sister and I'm her older brother and I need to know."

"It was Harry, okay!?" I blew up. "Harry came to visit me and he wouldn't go away and he made me spend the day with him and I told him I cried, begging dad not to ruin him, and I told him that I loved him!"

Holy shit. I took a deep breath in and closed my eyes, biting my lip. Fuck. I just messed up.

"You told Harry that you loved him?" Gavin asked slowly. I nodded, ashamed. "Do you really love him?"

Lulu snorted. "Why would she tell him if she didn't? Even if I don't think she should after what happened." Really Lulu? Really?

"What happened?" And now he was getting mad. His protective big brother face was on. "She told him she loved him accidentally when they were getting ready to fall asleep and then he ended up ignoring her and going out and getting caught cheating on her, and he didn't tell her so she found out through the gossip magazines and websites," Lulu spoke in one big rushed breath.

He was silent. Eerily silent. Without a word, he stood up, pushing the bar stool back making it screech against the tile floors. And he was headed for the front door. We followed after him, hot on his heels.

"Where are you going?" I rushed out. He snatched his keys out of the key bowl on the front hall table and slid his feet in his Sperry's. He looked like a doofus. He had on one of his old football shirts that he cut the sides out of, a pair of basketball shorts, a pair of high Nike Elite socks, his Sperry's and a snapback on backwards. "To find that fucking bastard and have a nice little chat," he replied.

I sighed loudly. "No! You can't, Gavin."

"And why the hell not?!" He whipped around to stare at me with fiery eyes. "Well for one, you don't know where he's staying."

He almost rolled his eyes. I could feel the anger coming off of him in waves. My smartass comments weren't helping me or his anger any. If I don't shut my mouth he'll end up sitting on top of me until I beg for mercy like he used to do when we were younger.

"And two, his security guard would get to you before you could get to him."

"Good god, Veve." He chuckled. "You honestly don't get it do you?"

Get what? "Get what?" Lulu asked. I swear, she's fucking Yoda.

He scoffed. "You're my sister. My baby sister. And if someone hurts you, whether it be mentally or physically, I'll hurt them ten times worse then they ever hurt you. I'll snap their damn neck. You haven't been yourself since you got back, you haven't been Veve, you've been like a walking zombie."

Tears gathered in my eyes. He took a step forward and wiped under my eyes where a few stray tears escaped. "Don't think that just because I pester and tease the shit out of you, means that I don't care about you. I love you baby sister. No matter how old you are, you'll always be my baby sister and I'll always look out for you. I'll always have your back. I'll always protect you."

I just broke down. The flood gates opened and I pretty much collapsed into him. He held me as if our lives depended on it, as I cried. We might have stood there for a good thirty minutes before I finally quit crying long enough to show him the text Harry sent me with his hotel and room number.

"I mean it, V," Gavin mumbled, bending down to look me in the eyes. "I love you." He kissed my forehead before turning to go to his car.


I just really miss you, I just really miss you,There's a life I can't ask you to leave.
I just really miss you, right now I kinda need to.The closest that you'll ever be to me
is free.

Now it's one more night at the upside down,
It's ten steps in, and hundred miles back out.

I just really miss you, I just really miss you,
There's a life I can't ask you to leave.
I just really miss you, right now I kinda need to.The closest that you'll ever be to me
is free.

There's a dark cloud hanging over my heart.....

Sad song after sad song. I was pathetic right now. Downright pathetic. Sad country songs were my go-to right now. Specifically Miranda Lambert's songs.

My phone rang making the music stop. It read Harry on the screen. I hit ignore and the music started playing again. Rolling the windows down on my moms car, I turned the music up and continued driving. Her car had a touch screen and Bluetooth so I could connect my phone to it. And right now, I was playing music and driving down some country back roads. Lulu was at work, Mom was at the lake with my cousin, her niece, LeiAnn, and Gavin was somewhere. Last I had seen him was yesterday when he got home from going to see Harry, and I had to doctor his knuckles which were swollen and cut.

There was a cute little pond just ahead, so I slowed down and came to a stop. Hopping out, I went to grab my phone but I shook my head. I didn't need it. I didn't want to be disturbed. Instead, I grabbed my camera and slipped it around my neck.

Today was just about relaxing. Relaxing for me is spending a day out with no one around to bother me and just taking pictures of anything and everything. Photography was my release.

When words become unclear, I shall focus with photographs. When images become inadequate, I shall be content with silence. -Ansel Adams

Words have become unclear. My life has become unclear. Everything about me is unclear. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know anything anymore. I didn't know what Gavin did to Harry. I'm not sure I wanted to know to be honest. I loved Harry, there was no getting around it. The thought of my brother hurting the guy I loved made me feel weird. I couldn't explain it except for it made me feel weird.

Gavin had every right to react the way did. Kohl would do the same if he was here. I'm sure when he called that Gav would tell him. The longer it took Kohl to get home from bootcamp, the more angry he would be. He had time to let his anger stew. And that wasn't good. So the next time he saw Harry, it wouldn't be good for him. I can only imagine the end result for Harry.

I'm not sure how long I stayed out there. A few minutes. A few hours. I don't know. But by the time I realized the sun was going down, the sound of another car coming to a stop made me look behind me. It was a '07 blacked out Chevy Avalanche. How did he find me?

"Ian?" My brows were furrowed. "What're you doing here?"

He shrugged as he sat down beside me on the grass. "Dayton, Lulu, and Gav were worried, so I might have called your uncle and had him turn the GPS on your phone on," he replied.

I let out an 'ahh'. "Nothing to be worried about," I spoke, motioning to myself. "I'm all fine and dandy."

He chuckled. "I know you can take care of yourself, babe."

The way he called me babe, it made my stomach do a little turn. It was weird. He shouldn't have that effect on me. He's only sixteen. That's pretty much illegal. Well, it is illegal. I shouldn't even think be thinking about this stuff.

"So why'd you choose to come all the way out here?" I shrugged. I didn't want to dump my shit on him. He was just a kid. "Just needed some fresh air. Why'd you decide to come find me? I figured Lulu would," I spoke.

Now it was his turn to shrug again. We were quiet for a while before he bumped shoulders with me. My eyes moved from the still water of the pond to his blue eyes.

"Hmm?"

His arm wrapped around my shoulders, pulling me into him. It felt weird. Kind of awkward. But I didn't do anything to move away. "So how's life? High school treatin' ya well? Any girls in the picture?"

He chuckled. "Life is good. High school blows. And yeah, there's a girl I like." My head whipped around to look up at him with a grin on my face.

"Aww!! Does little Ian have a crush?!" I teased. "What's she like?"

He smirked at me and rolled his eyes. "She's artistic. Has the brightest blue eyes I've ever seen. She has these little quarks too. They're adorable as fuck. Her sense of humor is hilarious; a little raunchy at times, but hilarious. But she's older then me and kind of has a thing with this other guy."

She seems like a cool chick. I wonder if I know her? Maybe I need to meet her...? "She seems legit. Do I know her?"

He hesitated on answering. Huh. Wonder why? "Uh...yeah, you know her." He finally nodded.

I stared up at him as I tried to rack my brain for any girls that I knew that fit his description. I came up empty handed. Who the hell—

"Veve?" He spoke. I blinked a few times and said, "Yeah?"

"I'm gonna kiss you." And he did. He kissed me. Right smack dab on the lips. His lips were soft. Fuck were they soft. I started kissing back, but came to my senses when he shoved his bottom between mine and then did the same with his tongue. Pushing him away, I hastily stood up.

"I, uh...I have to go," I stammered. He stood up and followed me to my car, trying to apologize. "Don't Ian," I spoke, when he grabbed my arm. I jerked it out of his grip and got in the car. "I gotta go. I'm sorry."

With that said, I took off. Jesus Christ. What the fuck just happened?