Your Reason to Be

Chennaya's POV

Tiger Tara Rawr ;): chey im so so sorry! pls don't hate me. i didnt mean what i said im so sorry! if youre still angry i understand, but pls come home soon. i love u <3

I press down on the button, locking the phone and place it face down on the cold table. I eye it and all colors, whether in the rainbow or not, are coating the whole table and spreads down the four legs, jumping onto the soft cushioned seats.

With a deep sigh, I reminisce and think back to my younger days. Both childhood and teenage years. Back to where I didn't care about much except having fun, being with friends and - my long time lover - music. I miss the times where I could just go out and have a good time without ever having to fuss about what outfit to wear, if I should wear make up or not, what if my classmates see me and if I'll ever spot cute guys roaming around the place so I'd have to go out all dolled up even if it was just a short trip to the nearby park.

I remember always visiting this place. It used to be my favorite spot to relax - either to hang out with a groupd of friends or to have ice cream and just breathe.

Most of those good days were, and are still, spent with my best friend, Tara. The person that I'm not on good terms with right this minute.

"Chennaya?" a voice wonders.

I stop tracing the wild shapes on the table to look up at the boy. I instantly smile at the sight of him. "William!?"

He sets down the smoothie in his hand and holds an arm out for me to shake. Instead of following after, I tug on him and pull his body for a tight hug. He wraps two slender arms around my shoulders, stays still for a few more seconds before letting go. I wish it's this easy to make up with a friend.

Will sweeps his thick fringe to the side, the same way Louis does, using his middle and index finger and thumb. His brown eyes watch me as I make some room for him to slide in beside me. "How are you Chey?" he says, his usually dull brown eyes shining over with a newfound excitement.

I shrug. "Nothing too special. What about you? You're taller than me! But you haven't changed much, huh? Just the hair?"

"Yeah I'm trying out Louis' old hairstyle, it looked good." He smiles sheepishly.

I resist the urge to pinch his cheeks. "You're so adorable Will. Fifteen now right? Any girls fainting over you?"

He blushes. "There is this one girl," he trails off. I nod my head egging him on. "And I've asked her out and she said maybe."

"Aww," I sang. "Maybe only? Tell her she's blind for not immediately agreeing."

William grins. "I will."

I point my head to the direction of the awaiting smoothie. "Aren't you gonna drink that?"

He chuckles. "No it's yours."

"Is it?" I reward him a thankful smile then grab the cold beverage and sip on the blue straw poking out from the lid. The sweetness of the mango burst my taste buds alive. I haven't had a drink this good in ages. I take another long slip before talking again. "How's school?"

"It's good. I've been getting bad grades in English though. I don't know why." He shrugs. "What about you?"

Pursing my lips together, I frown - he's always been good in English. "Me? I'm on a break from uni right now. I'm going back next month. Now what's this about failing English huh? What happened?" He lifts then drops his shoulders as a gesture to say 'I have no idea'. "I'll tutor you okay?" The cute smile appears again. This kid has always been adorable to my eyes.

A breeze floats by us and I look at the person who just entered, and disrupted the warmth going on. I quickly wish I hadn't been so curious.

The slender blondie stands in the middle of the ice cream shop, sporting a white and blue jumper, beige pants and his favorite pair of high tops. I dip my head down but his fast blue eyes catch me. He takes long strides toward my booth not wasting any time. "Chennaya," he says firmly but there's a hint of sadness in the tone.

William's brown eyes repetitively switch from me to Niall then back to me again. I wave his gaze away and say, "I'm sorry Will. We'll talk later again okay? Thanks for the smoothie."

He nods then slides out allowing the newcomer to freely take the space next to me. Niall doesn't and remains agonizingly still obviously waiting for me to obey him. Niall's fierce blue eyes remix me of the one Tara wore. With a sigh of defeat, I stand up and grab the smoothie in the last second.

The winter air crawls around our bodies causing goodbumps to rise along my arm even though I'm wearing a thick wool coat. I button it all the way to the top and hug my self, crossing arms over my chest, as if it can be used as a shield against the biting chilly wind.

Niall shoves both hands in his jumper but doesn't seem at all affected by the cold then leans against the wall, on the corner of the street. I stand in front of him.

"Hey." He smiles.

I haven't seen Niall so serious than those previous seconds. "Hi."

"I uh." He scratches the back of his head as nervous habit. "So Tara told me what happened. She's really sorry."

"She told me," I say continuing to sip on the straw. "She texted me. Was she really upset?"

"Yep. It was awkward."

"I'm not angry at her, I know she was in shock." Niall nods encouraging me to let it all out. "I'm just having some fresh air."

The second last thing Tara screamed at me before kicking me out of the house stirs the wheels in my head again. To be honest I have no idea how comforting my friend about her sister passing away led to a ridiculous argument about someone anonymously being in love with me. I consider all of the facts and the variety of outcomes that may happen if I continue on with this uncomfotable conversation. "Look, Niall, if I tell you the truth will you be honest with me?"

He slowly grabs the smoothie out of my hands and pull it up to his mouth. He takes a big sip causing it to make a slurping sound before replying. "Yeah...what is it?"

Nibbling on my top lip I decide to get it over with. "D-Do you love me?"

Niall drops the cup and it falls on the concrete floor, the lid pops of and the contents spill out colouring in the grey surface. He coughs, slapping his chest in order to stop choking. "I-I, umm."

"Just tell me. I don't care. Just- I need to know the truth."

He shakes his head. "I'm so sorry Chey. I really really fa-"

"No that's what I wanted." Our eyes meet for a couple of seconds as a silent conversation passes on through our minds. "Who then? One of you admitted it Niall. Even Tara said to me. I...know it's wrong to eavesdrop but the day I left, I heard you guys talking and and..."

He smiles. "You heard one of us say were in love with you, aye?"

"Yes. So I'm not going crazy?"

He chuckles showing the perfectly lined teeth. I admit, he looked cuter with the one crooked tooth. "Definitely not."

"Is that why- is that why you always hesitate to kiss me?"

A light shade of rosy pink rises to the surface of his cheeks. "Yeah."

I run my tongue along my bottom lip. "Who is it?"

Niall stares into my eyes, his light aqua orbs a metaphorical clamp attempting to open up my body to reach my soul, and find out my thoughts. He purses those light pink lips together - which I've tried many times to meet but was denied each time - still gazing intently at my face.

He finally speaks up but I don't like what I hear. "I think you already know the answer to that."

I puff out my cheeks and whine. "Niall."

"You and Louis are so alike. No wonder."

As I stretch out my hand to grab his, I stop. "Don't joke around with me Horan."

Niall nods, with a small sympathetic smile. "Well it's true."