Addicted
Two
"Astoria." He says my name like it is poison, letting it slip off his tongue with a cold glare my way. I close my eyes for just a moment trying to will myself somewhere else, change everything around me. Yet when I open my eyes and look up I am just met with the cold silver of his eyes. My hands start to shake under the table so I clench them together. Our family is watching us with hawk like focus, our every move scrutinized.
"Yes dear?" My voice no longer even sounds like my own, it is meek and hollow. We continue speaking; talking about things that no one in this room even cares for just to fill the black void of silence surrounding us. I stare down at my plate trying to remember how I got here, trying to remember where it all had gone wrong.
He was sweet at first, caring and attentive. He took time out of his day just to be with me. This was far from the Malfoy that everyone spread lies about; that everyone tried to convince me was just a snake hiding in the grass. I was so naive and fell for his show. Everything changed so quickly though, in the blink of an eye his soft tender caress turned to cold hard jerks. It was no longer love but lust that filled his steely eyes. And yet foolishly I hung onto the hope of a change, it was like clinging to a sinking ship.
I became so attached; I need to feel him even in the harshest ways. After every night I told myself this was it, yet when the bruises would fade I would find myself in his room again. Now the men are speaking, I stare down into my lap tracing the lines of the bruise forming on my wrist. It matches his hand perfectly; he shows no care for me anymore. I am just his object, something else he owns and can control.
Soon we're alone again and he is looking at me with those ice cold eyes again. There is nothing human in the way he looks at me, he has become a monster. In an instant I am on the bed, I have learned to just let him go and wait it out. I wince and try not to make a sound as my head slams against the backboard. His movements are fast and harsh, giving me no pleasure anymore. When it is over he simply rolls away and I find myself staring at the ceiling trying to find a way out. Then I hear it, the soft rustling of sheets, his breath coming closer to me, and then his hand touching my arm. I grow tense; this is not the way this goes anymore. I slowly turn my head and am met with a pair of icy grey eyes looking… empty.
"Astoria." He says my name as though it is something new and foreign, like he never spat it out at me in anger before. It feels precious this time. He falls back and stares at the wall; I reach over and gently place my hand on his arm covering up the gruesome mark. I am at a loss for words, his anger seems gone, I stare at this man who has seemed so cold for so long and do not recognize him anymore.
"Draco." Then suddenly our world shifts again.
"Yes dear?" My voice no longer even sounds like my own, it is meek and hollow. We continue speaking; talking about things that no one in this room even cares for just to fill the black void of silence surrounding us. I stare down at my plate trying to remember how I got here, trying to remember where it all had gone wrong.
He was sweet at first, caring and attentive. He took time out of his day just to be with me. This was far from the Malfoy that everyone spread lies about; that everyone tried to convince me was just a snake hiding in the grass. I was so naive and fell for his show. Everything changed so quickly though, in the blink of an eye his soft tender caress turned to cold hard jerks. It was no longer love but lust that filled his steely eyes. And yet foolishly I hung onto the hope of a change, it was like clinging to a sinking ship.
I became so attached; I need to feel him even in the harshest ways. After every night I told myself this was it, yet when the bruises would fade I would find myself in his room again. Now the men are speaking, I stare down into my lap tracing the lines of the bruise forming on my wrist. It matches his hand perfectly; he shows no care for me anymore. I am just his object, something else he owns and can control.
Soon we're alone again and he is looking at me with those ice cold eyes again. There is nothing human in the way he looks at me, he has become a monster. In an instant I am on the bed, I have learned to just let him go and wait it out. I wince and try not to make a sound as my head slams against the backboard. His movements are fast and harsh, giving me no pleasure anymore. When it is over he simply rolls away and I find myself staring at the ceiling trying to find a way out. Then I hear it, the soft rustling of sheets, his breath coming closer to me, and then his hand touching my arm. I grow tense; this is not the way this goes anymore. I slowly turn my head and am met with a pair of icy grey eyes looking… empty.
"Astoria." He says my name as though it is something new and foreign, like he never spat it out at me in anger before. It feels precious this time. He falls back and stares at the wall; I reach over and gently place my hand on his arm covering up the gruesome mark. I am at a loss for words, his anger seems gone, I stare at this man who has seemed so cold for so long and do not recognize him anymore.
"Draco." Then suddenly our world shifts again.