The Man I Thought I'd Never Love
Chapter 5
There are some images in life you can't un-see, moments you can un-live no matter how hard you try and in this moment I wanted nothing more than to disappear. To close my eyes really hard and wake up hours later safe and sound knowing my parents were alive and well. But this wasn't a dream, and shutting my eyes would do nothing to undo the damage already done in my world.
There was smoke coming out of the car, and yellow tape around the scene, just so the workers could do their job. Instead of things passing by as a slow blur, this time it all came rushing in on me at once. I took the blunt of the blows. There was a body bag on the ground, and someone was in it. My emotions and thought twirled. Spiraling out of control rapidly. Before I lost my sanity, and ability to simply form thoughts I noticed a lady was being lifted into the back of the ambulance. The lady was my mother. I had always thought she was so pretty with her flowing auburn hair, angelic face, and bright green eyes. But the woman I saw now looked fragile, and nothing like my mom, mainly because of the blood and dirt covering her face. The pouring rain seemed to have no affect on her.
My eyes watered. I could feel tears welling up, Brian was still behind me, but he was giving me my space. I was open and vulnerable and he knew it. I felt like a weak candle flame, at any given moment I could simply go out. I slowly walked over to the yellow tape. But no one saw me. I tried to get one of the many police officer’s attention, but when I tried to speak, nothing came out. I tried to force words out, with all my might. I was desperate for someone to hear me, but despite all my effort I remained silent to the world. Then from behind me Brian’s normally soothing voice erupted into something borderline vicious. “Excuse me officer.” He nearly shouted. A police officer who had been standing by the muddy ditch walked over. He, for some reason seemed to be the only one who heard Brian.
I heard Zacky and Matt finally catch up. That’s what they get for drinking and partying, Brian was twice as bad as them but somehow he could still run. “What happened?” I asked quietly, I could feel everyone’s eyes on me; my voice was tiny, and scratchy. They could all tell talking wasn’t easy, and holding back the tears was even harder. I felt a hand lay lightly on my shoulder, I was fairly certain it was Zacky. He and I had always been best friends, in fact I don’t think we had ever fought but once, and that was because of his ex girlfriend who is a mega bitch, and she basically thought she could walk all over my brother. Well she evidently thought wrong. She walked away with a black eye, and a couple cracked ribs, I walked away with a small cut in my lip. I can guarantee she won’t think about messing with me or my brother ever again. But since my parents were traveling, or always working Zacky and the band had basically raised me, helping with homework, and other issues that arrived randomly in any way they could.
Brian was responsible, Matt was intelligent, and Zacky was the one who always made us laugh. But right now I felt completely alone. As is no one was standing behind me, no one to catch me when I fell. Which I knew I was going to do soon. The officer started to speak, but I could tell he was cautiously choosing his words. “They seemed to be driving home. The roads were slick even earlier, a car must have crossed into their lane so the driver swerved, but it was on a curb so the car flipped twice while going down the hill, and ended up landing in that ditch. There were two people, a man and a woman.” He paused letting us take it all in. I’m sure the expression on my face was an eerily scary one. “And?” Zacky asked for me. His hand moved from my shoulder to my hand. Not in the odd way, but in the brotherly, I’m here for you no matter what kind of way. I could feel Brian behind me and his warm breath on my neck. Normally it would have been nice, but there was nothing to correct the wrong that had been done here tonight. “The man died near instantly, and the woman is in critical condition. They’re taking her to New Bethel hospital right now.” He paused and saw the expression on my face; it would have torn anyone’s heart into pieces I’m sure. “I’m so sorry.” He said; that was all he could say. He turned and must have gone back to work.
It took a split second for what I’d just heard to kick in, and when it did the pain was unbearable. It all happened so fast, I felt like I’d been hit by a car flying at the speed of sound. My world started going black, I suddenly got very dizzy, and started gasping for air.
There was smoke coming out of the car, and yellow tape around the scene, just so the workers could do their job. Instead of things passing by as a slow blur, this time it all came rushing in on me at once. I took the blunt of the blows. There was a body bag on the ground, and someone was in it. My emotions and thought twirled. Spiraling out of control rapidly. Before I lost my sanity, and ability to simply form thoughts I noticed a lady was being lifted into the back of the ambulance. The lady was my mother. I had always thought she was so pretty with her flowing auburn hair, angelic face, and bright green eyes. But the woman I saw now looked fragile, and nothing like my mom, mainly because of the blood and dirt covering her face. The pouring rain seemed to have no affect on her.
My eyes watered. I could feel tears welling up, Brian was still behind me, but he was giving me my space. I was open and vulnerable and he knew it. I felt like a weak candle flame, at any given moment I could simply go out. I slowly walked over to the yellow tape. But no one saw me. I tried to get one of the many police officer’s attention, but when I tried to speak, nothing came out. I tried to force words out, with all my might. I was desperate for someone to hear me, but despite all my effort I remained silent to the world. Then from behind me Brian’s normally soothing voice erupted into something borderline vicious. “Excuse me officer.” He nearly shouted. A police officer who had been standing by the muddy ditch walked over. He, for some reason seemed to be the only one who heard Brian.
I heard Zacky and Matt finally catch up. That’s what they get for drinking and partying, Brian was twice as bad as them but somehow he could still run. “What happened?” I asked quietly, I could feel everyone’s eyes on me; my voice was tiny, and scratchy. They could all tell talking wasn’t easy, and holding back the tears was even harder. I felt a hand lay lightly on my shoulder, I was fairly certain it was Zacky. He and I had always been best friends, in fact I don’t think we had ever fought but once, and that was because of his ex girlfriend who is a mega bitch, and she basically thought she could walk all over my brother. Well she evidently thought wrong. She walked away with a black eye, and a couple cracked ribs, I walked away with a small cut in my lip. I can guarantee she won’t think about messing with me or my brother ever again. But since my parents were traveling, or always working Zacky and the band had basically raised me, helping with homework, and other issues that arrived randomly in any way they could.
Brian was responsible, Matt was intelligent, and Zacky was the one who always made us laugh. But right now I felt completely alone. As is no one was standing behind me, no one to catch me when I fell. Which I knew I was going to do soon. The officer started to speak, but I could tell he was cautiously choosing his words. “They seemed to be driving home. The roads were slick even earlier, a car must have crossed into their lane so the driver swerved, but it was on a curb so the car flipped twice while going down the hill, and ended up landing in that ditch. There were two people, a man and a woman.” He paused letting us take it all in. I’m sure the expression on my face was an eerily scary one. “And?” Zacky asked for me. His hand moved from my shoulder to my hand. Not in the odd way, but in the brotherly, I’m here for you no matter what kind of way. I could feel Brian behind me and his warm breath on my neck. Normally it would have been nice, but there was nothing to correct the wrong that had been done here tonight. “The man died near instantly, and the woman is in critical condition. They’re taking her to New Bethel hospital right now.” He paused and saw the expression on my face; it would have torn anyone’s heart into pieces I’m sure. “I’m so sorry.” He said; that was all he could say. He turned and must have gone back to work.
It took a split second for what I’d just heard to kick in, and when it did the pain was unbearable. It all happened so fast, I felt like I’d been hit by a car flying at the speed of sound. My world started going black, I suddenly got very dizzy, and started gasping for air.
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Yes I know it's been a long long time, like years. But years later my writing sucks less and I really have been itching to work on this story so viola :)