My Only One

Lexie clocked out of the main office or her works building, put on her coat and headed out for the stairs. She walked outside into the car park where she got into her car, which was parked in its usual spot. When she got in her car, she exchanged the heels she wore for work, for a pair of flat shoes.

She couldn't drive in heels. She remembered the days when she could never wear heels... now she wore them on a daily basis. Infact, she wore more girly things than what she did when she was a teenager. Right now she was wearing a black pencil skirt, a simple white blouse and a black cardigan, with her coat over it. Very mature and corperate, she thought to herself.

Sighing, shaking off her memories of the past, Lexie started the car and headed home. She put the radio on and was tapping her fingers on the steering wheel as she drove, when a song playing caught her attention. I know that voice, she thought. She would know that voice anywhere. Turning the volume up, she listened carefully.

Maybe it's not my weekend,

But it's gonna be my year,

And I'm so sick of watching while the minutes pass as I go nowhere,

And this is my reaction to everything I fear,

'Cos I've been going crazy, I don't wanna waste another minute here.

Alex, she thought. His voice was slightly different to how it was when she knew him, but she recognised it. Her thoughts were confirmed when the radio host said, "And that was All Time Low with Weightless."

All Time Low. They had made it. Tears started to well in her eyes and she hastily wiped her face with her sleeve as she pulled into the driveway to her house. Jonathan wasn't home yet, he finished work an hour later than she did.

Sniffling, she quickly made her way through the front door and dashed around the living room to find her laptop. She waited impatiently for the internet to load, and then quickly searched 'All Time Low' on Google. She clicked on the first link that came up, which lead her to their Wikipedia page. She read through it nervously and excitedly.

She discovered that they'd had 2 more albums after The Party Scene and their fourth album called Dirty Work was due out soon. They've done so much, she thought in awe. There was a lot of stuff about their tour history, all the amazing bands they'd toured with.

She bit her lip, thoughtfully. It said here that they were starting their US headline tour this month, could it be that they were in the UK right now? Touring here before they went to the US?

She went on the first ticket website she could think of and searched them. There it was. They were playing at London Brixton Academy. Tonight. And tomorow as well. They were the last two dates of their UK tour. It was sold out.

Lexie couldn't decide whether she was happy or sad about that. As soon as she heard them on the radio, she immediately began thinking about ways she could get to see them again. But should she do that? Would it hurt too much to see them all again? It wasn't as if she left on a positive note. She figured that if she ever saw Alex again, he would be furious.

But she couldn't just forget about it now. Now that she knew they were here. The venue was only half an hour away from where she was, except that the tickets were sold out. But Lexie had been to enough concerts to know that there is always people selling tickets outside the venue before doors open.

It was a rash decision. A stupid impulse, but she had to do it. She had to go see them.

She scrambled around in her bag for her phone and called Isabelle, her best friend.

"Are you doing anything tonight?" she asked as soon as Isabelle answered.

"Well I was planning to eat my way through a full tub of ice cream and watch re-runs of The Vampire Diaries, but I take it you have something better?"

"Yes," she said, trying not to smirk. Isabelle was always like this, it's why she loved her so much. "I need to go to a concert tonight and I don't want to go alone."

"Woah, that was sudden," Isabelle said. "Usually you give me a couple hours notice at least before you drag me along to a concert."

"Izzy, it's them."

Isabelle was silent for a moment, then she heard her gasp in surprise as she understood what Lexie meant. "You mean they're playing a show tonight? I thought you never searched for them. You said it would be too hard to do."

"I heard them on the radio on the way home from work. They're playing Brixton tonight and tomorow. I can't not go," Lexie said, almost pleading.

Isabelle sighed. "Okay, I'll go with you. Pick me up in an hour."

"Okay, bye!" Lexie said excitedly and ran upstairs to get ready.

She met Isabelle at work when she first started and she was the best friend that Lexie had ever had. Lexie told her all about her past. She knew about All Time Low and Alex, but Lexie made her promise to never try and find out how they were doing career-wise. She wanted to put everything behind her, but now they were here. It was almost as if she was meant to hear them on the radio.

She rummaged around to find something she could wear, but her fashion style had changed since she was a teenager. She put on her only pair of skinny jeans and wore a plain white t-shirt with her black baseball style jacket. Then she put on her pair of trainers that she only rarely wore. She left her hair as it was, in a ponytail, and grabbed her bag heading downstairs.

She scribbled a note to Jonathan so he would know where she was and got into her car to pick Isabelle up. It was only a ten minute drive and she beeped the car horn when she pulled up outside. Isabelle came out, wearing jeans as well and a blue checkered shirt.

Isabelle had a kind of obvious beauty. She had long dark hair and striking green eyes, framed by thick lashes. She was tall and slender and heads turned wherever she walked. She looked good in just about anything, and though her attire was usually made up by dresses and high-heeled boots, she knew better than to wear something like that to a concert.

As Isabelle climbed into the passenger seat, she said, "Do you even have tickets for this?"

"Nope. It's sold out," Lexie told her as they drove down the street. "But there's usually people outside selling tickets, so I'm hoping that we can get them there."

"And if we can't?"

Lexie hesitated, "Then I'm going to come back later when it will be over and try and find them outside the venue."

Isabelle looked at her, concern in her eyes. "Are you sure you're ready to see them again? Especially Alex. I mean, you told me what everything was like between you two. Love like that doesn't just fade away."

"I know," Lexie said. "It doesn't, but I'm with Jonathan now. It's not like I'm going to see Alex and we're going to run into each others arms. He'll probably hate me, but I need to see them. I feel as though hearing them on the radio was a sign that I was supposed to go tonight."

"Well I hope you're right," Isabelle said.

The rest of the journey was spent in silence and only when they parked and got out of the car, heading towards the venue, did Isabelle speak again.

"How much do you think tickets are going to be?"

"Not cheap," Lexie said. "I brought £100 in cash, just in case."

Luck was on their side. There was a couple of guys trying to sell off extra tickets and Lexie bought two, for £20 each. They made their way to the back of the queue and were standing for half an hour before they were let in.

"I want to stand at the back," Lexie said to Isabelle as the security scanned their tickets. Isabelle just nodded and stood beside her at the back of the room as everybody else filed inside, cramming around the stage.

"Are you nervous?" Isabelle asked her, tilting her head to the side so that her hair cascaded around her shoulders.

"Extremely," she replied, honestly. Isabelle reached out and took her hand, squeezing it reasuringly.

They watched the first two supporting acts, Young Guns and Yellowcard and Lexie found herself greatly enjoying both of the bands sets. Isabelle seemed to enjoy it too.

Then when the room was silent again, members of the crew began walking on the stage setting everything up. Lexie recognised somebody.

"Oh my god," she said. "That's Matt!"

"Flyzik? Their tour manager?" Isabelle asked. Lexie only nodded, staring in awe. Somehow seeing Matt there made everything more real. All Time Low really were backstage, getting ready to perform to all these people.

Then it started. It began with what Lexie recognised as a clip from Home Alone and the band came out on stage, launching into their first song. Lexie felt her heart rate speed up double time, shock sinking in. They were really there.

In all honesty, she didn't pay much attention to the song they were playing to start with. She was too busy looking at them. Though she could not see Rian that much as he was at the back, he had changed. The fact that he no longer had hair, but a buzz cut was the first thing she noticed.

Her gaze shifted to Zack, who had gotten significantly more muscley and Lexie could make out tattoos along his arms as he played his bass. Then she looked at Jack, who was just as skinny as ever, but his hair was different. There was no longer blonde streaks in it, but it was all black and styled perfectly.

Her eyes moved to Alex and she felt her heart melt looking at him. He still looked the same, but different as well. His hair was a red-brown colour and was shorter than she remembered. His face still looked the same, except older. He still had those gorgeous brown eyes that she could always lose herself in, the same cute little nose and the same perfect lips. Everything about him was perfect.

She felt Isabelle poking her in the side and turned to look at her.

"Is that Alex?" she mouthed, as there wasn't a hope of hearing her with the noise. Lexie nodded. Isabelle had only seen old picture of her and Alex together and she looked surprised with what she was seeing on stage.

Lexie changed her focus to what she was hearing and found herself feeling lost in Alex's voice. It was higher than she remembered. Not feminine. Just higher. He had more vocal range in him now.

Lexie watched them play their songs, laughed at their ridiculous stage banter and then her heart beat erratically in her chest as Alex was alone on stage with just an acoustic guitar.

"This song's called Remembering Sunday," he said into the mic and began playing.

Lexie listened carefully to the lyrics and tears slipped soundlessly down her cheeks, was this song about her?

Forgive me I'm trying to find,

My calling, I'm calling at night,

I don't mean to be a bother, but have you seen this girl?

She's been running through my dreams,

And it's driving me crazy, it seems,

I'm gonna ask her to marry me.

Alex sang it flawlessly, so full of raw emotion.

The neighbours said she moved away,

Funny how it rained all day,

I didn't think much of it then but it's starting to all make sense.

Then the point of view of the song changed to first person and Lexie could only assume it was meant to be from the girls point of view.

I'm not coming back,

I've done something so terrible,

I'm terrified to speak.

But you'd expect that from me,

I'm mixed up, I'll be blunt, now the rain is just

Washing you out of my hair and out of my mind,

Keeping an eye on the world,

From so many thousands of feet off the ground, I'm over you now,

I'm at home in the clouds, and towering over your head.

Tears were rolling down her cheek as she listened to it. She was positive that it was about her, as conceited as that may sound. Alex used songs as a way of expressing his emotions. He could have easily wrote one about her when she left. This seemed to fit.

Isabelle must have noticed her crying, and too picked up on the lyrics, so she wrapped an arm around her waist in a comforting hug.

Lexie listened to the last two songs of the set, feeling rather numb. She made the decision in her mind. She was going to find a way to get backstage. She had to see him again. Even if he hated her, she had to apologize for the pain she caused him.

So after their last song and they went offstage, Lexie waited with Isabelle as everybody bought their merch and left the venue. Then when it was just them two left, they walked over to the merch table.

"Vinny?" she asked nervously.

He had been putting shirts in boxes behind him and turned round at the sound of her voice. "Yeah? What is it you --" He stopped talking when he caught sight of her. "Lexie?"

"It's me," she said quietly, awaiting his reaction.

"I can't believe you're here!" he yelled and climbed over the table to pull her into a hug.

"I can't believe I'm here either, to be honest," she said and wiped her tears away with her hand as he pulled back from her.

It then got awkward. Obviously Vinny knew everything that had happened and he seemed to have only just realised and was looking at her as if he was deciding whether to be angry or not.

"I know you probably hate me," she said. "I hurt Alex by leaving and you probably think that I'm a coward, but --"

"I don't hate you, Lexie," he told her. "You were a good friend to me. I was really upset when you left, but I understood why you did it."

"What about Alex?" she asked quietly, afraid of the answer.

Vinny hesitated. "He wasn't great. It took him years to get over you. I don't know it you picked up on it or not, but Remembering Sunday is about you."

"Yeah, I figured that out," she said. "Did he -- did he get better?"

"Eventually, yeah," Vinny said. "He's had quite a few girlfriends since you but none of them compared. They never lasted long."

Guilt washed over her, how could she have done that to him? She thought about his face when he played that song. She didn't think he was properly over her. Not yet. The emotion he put into that song when he sang it, proved that. Everytime he sang it, it was a reminder of what Lexie did to him and that killed her inside.

She didn't even notice she was crying until Isabelle handed her a tissue silently. She had actually forgotten that Isabelle was still here.

"Do you want to see him?" Vinny asked.

She nodded. She had to see him. She needed to apologize.

She followed Vinny to the back of the venue where he lead her and Isabelle down a couple of corridors until they came to a room with a few sofas. There was bags scattered everywhere and food left out on the coffee table.

"They're just outside signing stuff for the fans," Vinny told her. "Just wait here until they come in."

Lexie nodded and Vinny left without another word. Isabelle looked at her nervously.

"What are you thinking?" Isabelle asked.

"That Alex is going to absolutely hate seeing me again," she said truthfully. "I'm thinking maybe I should leave now before he sees me, but no doubt Vinny will tell him that I was here. Then he will hate me even more for leaving him a second time."

"I don't think Alex hates you," Isabelle said gently. "He's hurt, sure, but hate? Not a chance."

"I hope so," Lexie said weakly and then her head quickly snapped to the side at the sound of voices. They were getting closer, she could definately hear Jack's voice among them. They were back. This was it.

Jack was the first to enter the room, followed by Rian and at first they didn't seem to notice her sitting on the couch in the middle of the room.

"Lexie?" Jack whispered. Rian was just staring at her in disbelief.

"Hi Jack," she said quietly, lip quivering, threatening more tears. She thought he was going to shout, but he rushed towards her, throwing himself in her arms, squeezing her tightly.

"It's so good to see you," he said, releasing her. Rian came over and gave her a tight hug as well.

"I can't believe you're here," Rian said.

"Neither can I," Lexie said with a nervous chuckle. More voices sounded from outside the room, one she distinctly recognised. She listened carefully to what was being said and noticed Jack and Rian doing the same.

"I'm going to go shower, see ya in a bit," someone said. Zack.

"Okay, we're getting drinks in soon though, make sure you're ready for then," someone else said. Alex.

"I wouldn't miss it," Zack said and she heard the sound of another door, then footsteps as Alex got closer to them.

Jack and Rian stood infront of her, kind of blocking her from view as she heard Alex walk into the room.

"What are you just standing there for?" Alex asked.

"Well you see, Alex --" Rian began, but Lexie moved him aside so that she could see Alex and he could see her too.

He dropped the bottle of water to the floor that he had been in the middle of drinking, where its contents spilt over the carpet, but he didn't seem to notice.

"Lexie?" he said quietly, his eyes wide.