What I Am to You

He was still lying there when the light of the moon turned orange with the glaze of a rising sun. He heard feet on the stairs, heard Phillip enter the depths of sleep. He just listened to the clock punch minutes into the room, he couldn't sleep. Something in him wouldn't allow it. Phillip rolled onto his back, and Joshua pressed his face into his shoulder, letting his lips brush his skin before he shut his eyes.
"Hey Josh, have you-" Hollie bounced into the room but her question stopped short. Joshua spun around fast, and took a deep breath, he was about to talk. They just stared hard at one another, her thin lips curling into a sneaky smile. Phillip stretched, making that grunting noise he always made as he stretched, Joshua strained to keep his face blank as he and Hollie just stared. Phillip looked over as he sat up.
"Shit," he muttered, and let himself drop back onto the bed. "Good morning, Hollie," Phillip announced. Joshua laughed at the tone he always used when he spoke with her, Joshua knew he didn't like her, she didn't. She smiled.
"Good morning." Her voice was too peppy. Joshua smiled again and just looked at the sheets. "So, what kind of pancakes do you want? There's strawberries and chocolate chips," she went on. Joshua heard Philllip mocking her behind him. The snozberries taste like snozberries, Joshua couldn't help but laugh.
"I want strawberries, but not cooked in them, you know what I mean?" Joshua explained and Hollie nodded.
"You?" she piped up, addressing Phillip. Phillip propped himself up on his elbows, and cleared his throat. Joshua had to stifle a giggle, because he knew Phillip was about to pop off with some smart alec remark.
"I, ma'am, I happen to be what society calls a man. Men don't eat girly flapjacks for breakfast, so I'm just going to stick with some manly cereal," Phillip said. Hollie smiled at him.
"Cool, but Skylar ate the Lucky Charms. All that is here is Joshua's Kashi," she said, the blend of her accents making the sentence that much more comical. Phillip made a face.
"What flavor is that? No. Shit that's gay. Chocolate chip is fine." Hollie rolled her eyes and pulled the door shut. The room reverberated with their quiet laughter. Phillip fell back, and looked at the clock. "Cute that she wakes us up for breakfast every Thusrday."
"Yeah," Joshua agreed and he laid down. He was on his stomach, face buried in his pillow facing away from Phillip. There was a long but comfortable silence, and Phillip rubbed Joshua's back in slow straight motions.
"Wait." Phillip grabbed Joshua's shoulder and pulled him so he had to look at him. "You told her!" He realized. "You told her you had a thing for me!" The twang in his words was exacerbated by his mock annoyance. Joshua couldn't contain his giggles.
"I would never!" He turned and Phillip grabbed his hands, trying to pin him. Joshua pushed back, and they were laughing. "I wouldn't," he said, and Phillip put his face closer to his and raised his eyebrows. "Nope." Phillip gave him that tantalizing smile before kissing him. "I totally did," Joshua mumbled from beneath him, and then he pulled Phillip closer as their kiss deepened. Their tongues tangled in a slow sensual dance, and Joshua gently ran his fingernails slowly up Phillip's pale back. Goosebumps erupted over his skin, and just as he sank his teeth into Joshua's bottom lip and growled, the door swung open. Phillip rolled over onto his back, and was laughing.
"Hey, hi, what's up?" he greeted Hollie for the second time.
"Breakfast is done," she said tentatively. Joshua smiled at her, and didn't get up until she walked away but she left the door open. Phillip got up first, pulling the blankets aside to look for his tank top. He pulled it on, and then grabbed his pants off the floor. He pulled them on, and stood there for a second. He felt that same dull ache in his body, but it only made him want it again.
"You should let me walk out there first, and I'll just tell them you're in the bathroom," Phillip said, and Joshua looked at him quizically. "Just in case someone is out there." He was smiling mischievously, but Joshua only nodded. "I'd kiss you, but if I do that, we'll never get out there," he said, and Joshua laughed as he got out of bed.
"I got you," he said, and Phillip stood in the doorway listening to count the seconds until Josh got to a mirror. Phillip didn't hesitate to laugh when he heard him exclaim: "Damn it!"
"What's so funny?" Skylar asked, smiling up at Phillip from the table. He smiled at her as he sat down.
"Nothing," he said, cutting his pancakes. "Hollie, these look great." Southern hospitality wasn't something he left back in Georgia. He poured syrup over them, and Hollie sat down. "Where's Jessica?"
"Too uppity to get out of bed," Skylar snapped and Phillip nodded, taking a bite of his pancake. "Where's Joshua?"
"He'll be out," he answered. "You know, Hollie, these are really good." He was trying to distract them, just in case Joshua couldn't cover the damage he'd done to his neck. Phillip smirked just thinking about it. Hollie caught on.
"For feminine flapjacks?" she asked. Phillip pointed at her with his left hand.
"No, they're girly. Just like alliterations." Both of them were laughing.
"Look at you knowin' somethin'!" She joined their laughter, Phillip didn't like the way she laughed, and he looked down to keep from staring at her nose and the way it scrunched. He looked at her plate. Her pancakes were naked under a pile of blueberries. It looked disgusting. "Look who decided to show up!" Phillip rolled his eyes as Joshua took a seat across from him where his plate was sitting. Skylar was always so loud, imploring them to look at things. Phillip didn't know if he was easily annoyed, or if she was just as strident as he thought. Living with someone taught you a lot about them.
"Yeah, had a mishap. I couldn't find my contacts," he explained. They all knew he didn't wear glasses, but no one said anything. Phillip just kept eating, not wanting to laugh. Joshua could see the mark on his shoulder. "I hate not being able to see," he said, enunciating the word see, trying to get Phillip's attention. Just before he had time to kick Phillip under the table, Skylar noticed.
"Ooh, who you been gettin down with?" she asked, and Phillip looked at her.
"What?" he asked, and Joshua rolled his eyes. He just took a long drink of juice from Hollie's cup.
"You got a mark right there," she said, pointing to her left shoulder. Phillip looked down at it, rubbed his hand over it.
"Oh, huh. Yeah. I tripped last night in the shower, the showerhead fell and just cracked me in the shoulder, that's all." His explanation was flawless, and Skylar bought it. The rest of the meal was wrought with trivial conversation, and Phillip's foot trailing up Joshua's calf, slowly. He just loved to see the way Joshua reacted to him. He didn't stop until he heard Jessica come down the stairs. She wore what she slept it, hot pink shorts and a pink spaghetti strap. Conversaton dissipated when she sat down, none of them liked her.