Status: Completed 6/19/2012
Forget Your Mistakes
Never Have I Ever Felt Like This Before
“Jamie,” I whispered, “I don’t know if I can do this.. I don’t want to leave you.” He set his guitar to the side and pulled me onto his lap, “Alex, we both know you have to go. No one said this was going to be an easy thing to go through. Hell, I didn’t even know you were leaving until four months ago. But you know what?” he put his hand on my cheek and turned my head so I was looking at him, “I know we can make it work. You’ve supported my brother and I with our dream, now it’s our turn to support you and Rebekah with yours.” I tried to smile, but I couldn’t. All I was able to do was lean my forehead on his and cry softly. He was right. I couldn’t just waste the work I had done to get that scholarship. And even though I wouldn’t see him for God knows how long, I had to go. “I love you, Jamie Christian.” I said quietly. He kissed me and whispered back, “I love you more, Leah Alexandria.”
I made Jamie give me a piggy back ride back to our apartment, simply because I didn’t know if my own legs could carry me more than 5 feet. When we got home, we noticed Ryan and Rebekah on the couch. Ryan had his arms around Rebekah’s waist, and her head was laying on his shoulder. Before they noticed we walked in, I snuck up behind them and said excitedly, “How are you two love birds doing?” Rebekah jumped up and hit my arm. “Leah Alexandria Davis!” she yelled, “Do not do that!” I threw my hands into the air and backed away slowly, “Sorry,” and started laughing. Jamie looked at Ryan and they both smiled.
Later that night, Jamie was with Ryan, Ian, and Nash doing whatever it is guys in bands do, and Rebekah and I had some alone time. “Have you reconsidered this whole thing at all? Like, possibly not going to New York and staying here instead?” Rebekah asked out of the blue. “Well, yeah. Of course I have.” “What do you think we should do?” “In all honesty, I think we need to go to New York.” “But..I thought you’d want to stay here with Jamie..?” Rebekah seemed to be shocked that that statement even came out of my mouth. “I do, more than I’ve ever wanted anything in this world. But I talked to Jamie about it earlier today, and he told me that it was their turn to support our dream. And our dream has always been to go to photography school in New York City.” Rebekah looked down at the floor, then back up at me, “They really are great guys.” “Yeah.. But, hey, are you and Ryan…you know? A thing now?” The biggest smile crept onto her face as she nodded shyly. I hugged her and smiled, “That’s great! I’m so happy for you! You know, if we marry them, we’ll be sisters-in-law.” I winked at her. She laughed, “We should probably get to bed.. Big day tomorrow.” Our smiles slowly faded as I agreed, “Yeah… Where’d the boys run off to?” “I don’t know. I thought they would have been back by now though. I’m sure they’ll come back eventually.” I nodded as we headed up to bed, me obviously going into Jamie’s room, Rebekah going into Ryan’s.
As if I even need to tell you this, the next day certainly wasn’t a cakewalk for any of us. I had tears running down my face, Jamie was begging me to stop crying, Rebekah was about to break down, and Ryan didn’t want to let go of her. “I know you don’t want to go, babe, but you have to,” Jamie begged, “I know this is your dream and I’m not going to let myself get in the way of it. I promise you, Ryan and I will visit you guys as soon as we can. But for right now, you have to trust that no amount of distance will ever ruin what we’ve got.” I lifted my head off his chest and sniffled, “I love you, Jamie.” He smiled, “I love you more, Alex,” and kissed me. “Promise you’ll send us signed copies of your EP when it’s done?” I smiled back at him once we pulled away. “Of course,” he laughed lightly.
We had finally gotten onto the plane for a ride that would seem like forever. I took the window seat, and Rebekah had the seat right next to me. She looked over and noticed I was crying again, so she grabbed my hand, telling me everything would be okay without actually vocalizing anything. I laid my head on her shoulder and we braced ourselves for the flight into New York. Don’t get me wrong here, I couldn’t wait to see what our lives would be like in what would seem like a completely new world, but I knew we were both going to miss our lives in Tennessee.
I made Jamie give me a piggy back ride back to our apartment, simply because I didn’t know if my own legs could carry me more than 5 feet. When we got home, we noticed Ryan and Rebekah on the couch. Ryan had his arms around Rebekah’s waist, and her head was laying on his shoulder. Before they noticed we walked in, I snuck up behind them and said excitedly, “How are you two love birds doing?” Rebekah jumped up and hit my arm. “Leah Alexandria Davis!” she yelled, “Do not do that!” I threw my hands into the air and backed away slowly, “Sorry,” and started laughing. Jamie looked at Ryan and they both smiled.
Later that night, Jamie was with Ryan, Ian, and Nash doing whatever it is guys in bands do, and Rebekah and I had some alone time. “Have you reconsidered this whole thing at all? Like, possibly not going to New York and staying here instead?” Rebekah asked out of the blue. “Well, yeah. Of course I have.” “What do you think we should do?” “In all honesty, I think we need to go to New York.” “But..I thought you’d want to stay here with Jamie..?” Rebekah seemed to be shocked that that statement even came out of my mouth. “I do, more than I’ve ever wanted anything in this world. But I talked to Jamie about it earlier today, and he told me that it was their turn to support our dream. And our dream has always been to go to photography school in New York City.” Rebekah looked down at the floor, then back up at me, “They really are great guys.” “Yeah.. But, hey, are you and Ryan…you know? A thing now?” The biggest smile crept onto her face as she nodded shyly. I hugged her and smiled, “That’s great! I’m so happy for you! You know, if we marry them, we’ll be sisters-in-law.” I winked at her. She laughed, “We should probably get to bed.. Big day tomorrow.” Our smiles slowly faded as I agreed, “Yeah… Where’d the boys run off to?” “I don’t know. I thought they would have been back by now though. I’m sure they’ll come back eventually.” I nodded as we headed up to bed, me obviously going into Jamie’s room, Rebekah going into Ryan’s.
As if I even need to tell you this, the next day certainly wasn’t a cakewalk for any of us. I had tears running down my face, Jamie was begging me to stop crying, Rebekah was about to break down, and Ryan didn’t want to let go of her. “I know you don’t want to go, babe, but you have to,” Jamie begged, “I know this is your dream and I’m not going to let myself get in the way of it. I promise you, Ryan and I will visit you guys as soon as we can. But for right now, you have to trust that no amount of distance will ever ruin what we’ve got.” I lifted my head off his chest and sniffled, “I love you, Jamie.” He smiled, “I love you more, Alex,” and kissed me. “Promise you’ll send us signed copies of your EP when it’s done?” I smiled back at him once we pulled away. “Of course,” he laughed lightly.
We had finally gotten onto the plane for a ride that would seem like forever. I took the window seat, and Rebekah had the seat right next to me. She looked over and noticed I was crying again, so she grabbed my hand, telling me everything would be okay without actually vocalizing anything. I laid my head on her shoulder and we braced ourselves for the flight into New York. Don’t get me wrong here, I couldn’t wait to see what our lives would be like in what would seem like a completely new world, but I knew we were both going to miss our lives in Tennessee.