Baby Blue Eyes

After a slow song that Emily teared up during, Sam led her back to a table with a few of their friends. She kept her arm around his waist the entire time and he had to fight the urge to just walk her around the room so she wouldn’t let go of him.

“I’ll get you something to drink,” he said and she nodded, already engrossed in a conversation with a concerned friend.

Kevin followed him and said, “Man, here’s your chance!”

“What are you talking about?” Sam asked as he paid for two water bottles.

“Emily! She just broke up with that douche bag, now is the perfect time to tell her you like her.”

“I don’t want to tell her,” Sam sighed. He wished his friend would let it go.

“Don’t you want to be with her? Why would you want to be in the friend zone when you could go out with her?”

“Look, I don’t expect you to understand. But with Emily, it’s different. I may never be her boyfriend, but I’m okay with that because at the end of the day I’m the only one dancing with her.”

Kevin shook his head, but didn’t say anything more as they went back to the table. A half hour later Emily told Sam she wanted to go home. He gladly obliged, and drove her home in the car that had seemed empty without her presence at the beginning of the night.

“Do you want to come in?” she asked after they ran out of things to talk about in her driveway.

“Your parents won’t mind?” he asked. Emily never considered rules or conventions, so he always made sure to.

“I’m sure they’re asleep by now,” she said, looking into her dark house. It was almost one.

So they went upstairs, on tip toes, and Emily carried her heels because she really couldn’t walk in them. In her room Sam sat on the bed and turned to face the wall while she changed into pajamas. He had seen her in less before, but he liked to be a gentleman. After pulling her hair back she snuggled under the covers and invited him in with her. He easily put his arms around her and she nestled her head in the crook of his elbow.

She sighed contentedly and then, “Do you ever think you should give up on love?”

“What?”

“Like what’s the point? Why should I bother dressing up and doing my makeup when in the end it won’t matter because it’s not going to work out?”

“You don’t need makeup to get a guy.”

“That’s not the point.”

Sam sighed too, “You’re only saying this because you’re upset over Andrew.”

“No, I mean it. Would I be better off putting my energy into other things? Like school or- or friends, or a new hobby? I could learn to play guitar in the time it takes a guy to ask me out after texting for a while. I could just stop dating and hope that I find love in inanimate objects.”

“I think love is worth it. Maybe you don’t have to date as much as you do, but you shouldn’t give up on love altogether. If someone makes you happy and makes you feel like you would sacrifice everything for them, then it’s always worth it. You don’t have to date a lot to find love. You don’t even have to date someone to love them. You just love.”

Sometime during his speech she had turned over to face him, “How did you get so wise?”

“I’m not wise.”

“Yeah you are,” she said softly, meeting his e yes with a look on her face that he didn’t recognize.

They were quiet for a while and she laid her head on his chest. He thought she fell asleep after a while and made a move to get up.

“Where are you going?” she asked.

“I was gonna go home.”

“Can you stay with me till morning? Just stay the night.”

He could barely see her beautiful eyes in the dark, but he knew the look that would be on her face, pleading. He nodded silently and pulled her closer. She wrapped her hands tighter around his neck and took a deep, shaky breath. He could sense that she was still upset over Andrew.

After a few minutes she brought one of her hands around to Sam’s face. She ran it over his cheek, nose, across his collar bone. He was frozen in place. He didn’t want to breath too loud, afraid of startling her out of whatever trance had her touching him like he always wanted her to.

She ran a hand through his hair, made circles in his arm with her thumb, and gently felt his eyelashes. He was more content than he had been in a very long time with her hands exploring his face.

“Sam,” she said suddenly, and he let out a breath that he seemed to have been holding in forever, “Why did we never go out?”

“What?”

“Why did we never try to date?”

“Because we’re best friends.”

“Yeah, but before we were best friends why didn’t we go out? We’re obviously perfect for each other- personality wise.”

“I can’t remember ever not being your best friend,” he said. He couldn’t believe what he was saying. If Kevin knew what was happening he would have punched him. But he couldn’t tell her. She was just in a thoughtful mood. She didn’t feel the same way he did. She wouldn’t even think about this come morning.

“Me neither,” she sighed and he desperately wanted to ask what thought had prompted her questions.

After a moment she asked, “Can I try something?”

“Try what?”

“Just let me,” she whispered and carefully brought her lips to his.

It was better than he ever imagined. Her lips were soft and she moved them sweetly against his. He could die happy now. She slowly brought a hand to his face.

“Emily, what are you doing?” he said before he got too lost in his feelings to return.

“I just wanted to see,” she said breathlessly.

“See what?” he said, so quiet he thought maybe she didn’t hear him because she never responded.

She didn’t move her hand from his cheek and didn’t open her eyes. He wondered if their friendship was ruined now. He could have told her everything, but no, she was the one that ruined things in the end. He felt like a coward.

“It wasn’t bad, was it?” she asked eventually.

“No,” he admitted.

“Could I do it again then?”

He was surprised, but not as surprised as he thought he would be. “Yes.”

He kissed her then, before she could do the same. He felt himself giving in to every urge he had ever felt. He kissed her hard, pulled her body even closer to his, guided her under him.

Maybe he would tell her eventually. Right now he wanted nothing more than to kiss her for the rest of his life. She didn’t seem to want anything else either. That moment with her, just the two of them connected in the dark, just felt right. Every moment with her felt right.