How I Met Your Father

"Why did daddy like Aunty Lisa?" Jasper frowned. I chuckled, ruffling his hair.

"Because daddy was a stupid man," I voiced.

"You sure were," Alex grinned, readjusting himself as Monique shuffled further down into the bed.

"You ready for me to continue?" I wiggled my eyebrows.

"Yeah!" my kids cheered in a chorus.

15th December 2004

Kids, never throw a party like your dad's and Aunty Lisa's. Not even when you're 25, rich as hell and independent, responsible adults.

The party hadn't even started, and Lisa's house was already trashed.

To say that they were a little tipsy was an understatement. Lisa and Alex had spilled two shots on the floor already, and were laying on the sofa, laughing with each other about nothing.

"So, Alex, do you have anyone special coming tonight? Maybe a guy you like?"

Alex ducked his head, his cheeks glaring red as he smirked.

"Maybe there is one person," he mumbled.

"Who? Who?" Lisa squealed.

"You know Kyle?"

"Kyle Burns? He's gay?"

Alex nodded, smiling to himself. He'd found the one person who made him forget about Jack.

Jack. Jack, with his huge brown eyes and skunk hair, that huge nose and that goofy smile. The boy with no muscle and barely and fat. He was all rude jokes and no seriousness.

"Yeah, Kyle's... Kyle's gay," he confirmed.

"Oh, Alex, that's so cute! I can't wait to see you two together, I bet it's adorable!"

"What about you and Jack? Hmm?"

"He asked me out last night."

"Last night? At mine?"

"No, no, no, afterwards. He dropped me home and then asked me out."

Alex felt his heart drop a little.

"And? What did you say?"

"I didn't answer yet. What should I say, Alex?"

"Say yes," he urged her. As much as he wanted to be with Jack, and as much as it pained him to see Jack with Lisa, he had Kyle, and Jack was far out of his reach. There was nothing more he could do than give up. He was happy with Kyle.

"But I-I don't know, Alex."

"Why not?"

"Because I-I don't... I love him, Alex, and I'm so scared of screwing this up. I'm so scared of him screwing this up."

"I'm sure it'll work out. You'd make a great couple. Jack's a great guy; one of my best friends, along with you," Alex ran his thumb over Lisa's cheek, "And I think you'd be perfect for each other."

Lisa blinked a few times before acting upon impulse. She lunged forwards, connecting her lips to Alex's.

Alex kissed her back for a while before the alcohol stopped clouding his mind. He pulled away, eyes blown wide.

"L-Lisa, what the hell?!" he gasped, "I-I have a boyfriend!"

"Alex, I-I don't even know what that was, I-I'm not sure..."

"Why the hell?"

"I-I just... I don't know. Too many shots, I guess. Alcohol has that effect on me," she pulled a face, "And I guess I kinda wish Jack was more like you."

"Lisa, look, I have to make this very clear. I'm gay. I-I could never want to be with you in that way," Alex shook his head, "I could never think about you like that."

"I'm so fucking confused right now, Alex."

"I know the feeling. Lisa, I-"

"I know, you're dating Kyle, and sometimes, I really wish I was him, but other times, I wish I was dating Jack. If I could combine you two, I'd be so happy."

"You can't, Lisa. Jack's a great guy, and I'd be the luckiest guy on the planet if I could say I was dating him."

"...Do you like Jack, Alex?"

"No," I huffed, "That's not what I'm trying to say. What I'm trying to say is that he's a great guy, and you should go for a chance like that. How do you know he won't be just like me if you were dating?"

"I don't know..."

"Exactly. Don't knock it till you try it. Now, let's forget that ever happened, okay?"

Lisa nodded, grinning.

"Do you like Jack, Alex?"

"No."

That was the biggest lie he'd ever told.