To Kill a Mockingjay
008;
Secrecy. Secrecy doesn't even come close. A mistake? Doesn't come close either. Betrayal? Sounds about right. I had already known that this little visit would end badly, but nothing could compare to this. It wasn't the act itself I am ashamed of, I was ashamed of the fact that I don't regret it, and that I wanted to do it again.
Earlier:
Though the set sun just as it always does in the eastern hemisphere, everything was out of balance. Gale's visit will surely cause more damage to Peeta, and even me. I don't know what his quest is, and I don't know if I will embark on it to find out. I kept my distance, always allowing myself five feet between us, I couldn't risk giving into temptation. Peeta was oblivious, but Gale wasn't.
We were back at the house after a few hours of silence in the woods. We didn't say a word to each other until we got back. When Peeta went up stairs to cleanse himself for the day, Gale took the opportunity to give me the guilt trip. "You aren't being fair, Katnip." His voice was low and filled with irritation. I smiled inside.
"I don't know what you are talking about, Gale." I lied. He saw right through it.
"I know what you are doing. You are scared you won't be able to resist."
"Resist what?" Instead of using diction, he leaned in. His lips touched mine for a long moment. Time seemed to stop for it. His lips were warm and soft. The animosity that I wanted to course through my veins only turned to hunger. Out of guilt I pushed him away. My fingers lingered on his chest, they curled around the fabric of his shirt; I pulled him back to me, letting our lips clash once more. The emotions that were boiling inside of me were arcane. I wanted Peeta to convene, to appear and stop this madness. Instead, time flew by with only us in our presence.
Our lips moved in sync together, it was like perfect harmony. My hands ran across his defined collar bones, they made their way up, letting my arms slither tightly around his neck. I felt his hands moving up and down my rib cage, their warmth releasing fire beneath the surface, the flames danced down my spine; I wanted more.
His lips curled upward in their corners, I smiled back before he pulled away. I stared up at him, our eyes were locked before noticing Peeta was making his way down the hall upstairs. That flaming grip of his let go of me, after that all I felt was emptiness, I wanted more, I wanted to feel wanted. I had always felt wanted by Peeta, but never by Gale. I craved his attention.
"Hey guys." Peeta exclaimed. Gale gave me a seductive smirk before turning to face Peeta. "Hey, how are you feeling?" Gale asked lovingly.
"Better. Sorry about the episode. Don't know what happened." He shot me a look, his eyes were filled with love. "Don't worry about it, Peeta. We've all been through a lot because of the Games, no one can blame you for what happened." Gale was increasingly encouraging, it scared me a little. He is being too nice. Peeta over looked it, or rather didn't notice it, and continued to make his way down the stairs. I turned away from them and headed toward the hallway to the little office in the back of the house. I closed the door behind me and let my mind race. What just happened?
I brought my hands to my face, my finger tips caressed my lips, I closed my eyes in comfort. I smile to myself, this is horrific, a disaster, I betrayed Peeta. I did feel bad, for a while at least. I sat in that chair for hours, watching as the sun went over the houses and hid behind the horizon line. Darkness enveloped me, I wanted so much more than just a delightful kiss. I wanted to go beyond that, I wanted to experience love. I felt ashamed until I started fantasizing about all of things I wanted him to do to me, that was when I realized that I hadn't regretted our actions.
I sighed and got up. My body was light and easy to move, the adrenaline coursed through my veins. The house was darker than black, I let my hands guide me until I found myself at the guest's room. I smiled cryptically. I've never really had a 'naughty' side per say, but I will admit that I have had at least one fantasy about Gale that went a little something like this. It only last a millisecond in my brain though, that was when I was on the train for my first Games, I immediately forced the thought out of my mind. I didn't want to fall in love with Gale and him not know it, and me possibly dying before telling him.
The door opened from the other side, Gale looked down to me. His eyes released compassion and need. "Where's Peeta?" I asked quietly.
"He's asleep. I got him up to bed a few hours ago. He's been passed out ever since." He whispered back. I smiled seductively. His hands grasped my hip bones, he thrusted me into him. I closed my eyes. This is what I want. I want all of him, I want all of what he could give me. I needed him.
My feet left the ground, my legs were wrapped tightly around his waste. He closed the door behind us quietly, my heart began to pound like a hammer against my rib cage. His lips met mine intensely, I kissed back with what power I had over him. He left me and trailed down to my jawline, my neck, he stopped there. An icy, electric bolt shot down my spinal chord. Teasing me, he stopped and continued to make his way with soft kisses down to my collar bones, my chest, my breasts. The bra supporting them collapsed eagerly. I groaned lightly, careful to keep us as silent as possible. I felt myself falling, the cushions beneath us were supporting. My legs spread as far as the could go, our clothes were pealed away in a blur. He laid on top of me, his eyes darkened. I wasn't afraid, I wasn't guilty, I wasn't ashamed. I opened myself up, my arms uncovered what bare skin I had left.
Gale analyzed my body, scrutinized what he has always dreamed of having. I looked him over too. His defined muscular body aroused me. I was cooing with excitement. I looked down at the bulge underneath what cloth remained. I bit my lip in anxiety. That will surely destroy me.
"Are you sure?" He breathed. His breath was coarse and thick against my skin. I shivered in delight. I nodded with a faint smile on my face. He removed what was left, my mouth almost hit the floor in awe. I never knew such seductive, sexual, tenancies were hidden inside of me. If only he could see the beast he made of me.
He crawled on top of me, he was placed between my legs. My back was arching, I wanted it. I held my breath in anticipation. Everything that I knew, flew out of my mind. My brain shut all thoughts of Peeta, out. It wouldn't allow me to feel the pain of regret or guilt, it wanted to shut me down. I let myself love Gale the way we were meant to for the short time that we had. I took matters into my own hands. I forced my hips against his, letting my body collide against his warm flesh.
Then I felt it.
He took control then; Gale's hips moved slowly at first, it was deep and passionate. It took everything out of me to keep quiet, to hold on to whatever virtue I had left. His lips met mine again, he kissed me deeply, I could feel the want and need in every movement he made. It wasn't enough. Once wasn't enough. This will definitely happen again; and I wanted it to.
Earlier:
Though the set sun just as it always does in the eastern hemisphere, everything was out of balance. Gale's visit will surely cause more damage to Peeta, and even me. I don't know what his quest is, and I don't know if I will embark on it to find out. I kept my distance, always allowing myself five feet between us, I couldn't risk giving into temptation. Peeta was oblivious, but Gale wasn't.
We were back at the house after a few hours of silence in the woods. We didn't say a word to each other until we got back. When Peeta went up stairs to cleanse himself for the day, Gale took the opportunity to give me the guilt trip. "You aren't being fair, Katnip." His voice was low and filled with irritation. I smiled inside.
"I don't know what you are talking about, Gale." I lied. He saw right through it.
"I know what you are doing. You are scared you won't be able to resist."
"Resist what?" Instead of using diction, he leaned in. His lips touched mine for a long moment. Time seemed to stop for it. His lips were warm and soft. The animosity that I wanted to course through my veins only turned to hunger. Out of guilt I pushed him away. My fingers lingered on his chest, they curled around the fabric of his shirt; I pulled him back to me, letting our lips clash once more. The emotions that were boiling inside of me were arcane. I wanted Peeta to convene, to appear and stop this madness. Instead, time flew by with only us in our presence.
Our lips moved in sync together, it was like perfect harmony. My hands ran across his defined collar bones, they made their way up, letting my arms slither tightly around his neck. I felt his hands moving up and down my rib cage, their warmth releasing fire beneath the surface, the flames danced down my spine; I wanted more.
His lips curled upward in their corners, I smiled back before he pulled away. I stared up at him, our eyes were locked before noticing Peeta was making his way down the hall upstairs. That flaming grip of his let go of me, after that all I felt was emptiness, I wanted more, I wanted to feel wanted. I had always felt wanted by Peeta, but never by Gale. I craved his attention.
"Hey guys." Peeta exclaimed. Gale gave me a seductive smirk before turning to face Peeta. "Hey, how are you feeling?" Gale asked lovingly.
"Better. Sorry about the episode. Don't know what happened." He shot me a look, his eyes were filled with love. "Don't worry about it, Peeta. We've all been through a lot because of the Games, no one can blame you for what happened." Gale was increasingly encouraging, it scared me a little. He is being too nice. Peeta over looked it, or rather didn't notice it, and continued to make his way down the stairs. I turned away from them and headed toward the hallway to the little office in the back of the house. I closed the door behind me and let my mind race. What just happened?
I brought my hands to my face, my finger tips caressed my lips, I closed my eyes in comfort. I smile to myself, this is horrific, a disaster, I betrayed Peeta. I did feel bad, for a while at least. I sat in that chair for hours, watching as the sun went over the houses and hid behind the horizon line. Darkness enveloped me, I wanted so much more than just a delightful kiss. I wanted to go beyond that, I wanted to experience love. I felt ashamed until I started fantasizing about all of things I wanted him to do to me, that was when I realized that I hadn't regretted our actions.
I sighed and got up. My body was light and easy to move, the adrenaline coursed through my veins. The house was darker than black, I let my hands guide me until I found myself at the guest's room. I smiled cryptically. I've never really had a 'naughty' side per say, but I will admit that I have had at least one fantasy about Gale that went a little something like this. It only last a millisecond in my brain though, that was when I was on the train for my first Games, I immediately forced the thought out of my mind. I didn't want to fall in love with Gale and him not know it, and me possibly dying before telling him.
The door opened from the other side, Gale looked down to me. His eyes released compassion and need. "Where's Peeta?" I asked quietly.
"He's asleep. I got him up to bed a few hours ago. He's been passed out ever since." He whispered back. I smiled seductively. His hands grasped my hip bones, he thrusted me into him. I closed my eyes. This is what I want. I want all of him, I want all of what he could give me. I needed him.
My feet left the ground, my legs were wrapped tightly around his waste. He closed the door behind us quietly, my heart began to pound like a hammer against my rib cage. His lips met mine intensely, I kissed back with what power I had over him. He left me and trailed down to my jawline, my neck, he stopped there. An icy, electric bolt shot down my spinal chord. Teasing me, he stopped and continued to make his way with soft kisses down to my collar bones, my chest, my breasts. The bra supporting them collapsed eagerly. I groaned lightly, careful to keep us as silent as possible. I felt myself falling, the cushions beneath us were supporting. My legs spread as far as the could go, our clothes were pealed away in a blur. He laid on top of me, his eyes darkened. I wasn't afraid, I wasn't guilty, I wasn't ashamed. I opened myself up, my arms uncovered what bare skin I had left.
Gale analyzed my body, scrutinized what he has always dreamed of having. I looked him over too. His defined muscular body aroused me. I was cooing with excitement. I looked down at the bulge underneath what cloth remained. I bit my lip in anxiety. That will surely destroy me.
"Are you sure?" He breathed. His breath was coarse and thick against my skin. I shivered in delight. I nodded with a faint smile on my face. He removed what was left, my mouth almost hit the floor in awe. I never knew such seductive, sexual, tenancies were hidden inside of me. If only he could see the beast he made of me.
He crawled on top of me, he was placed between my legs. My back was arching, I wanted it. I held my breath in anticipation. Everything that I knew, flew out of my mind. My brain shut all thoughts of Peeta, out. It wouldn't allow me to feel the pain of regret or guilt, it wanted to shut me down. I let myself love Gale the way we were meant to for the short time that we had. I took matters into my own hands. I forced my hips against his, letting my body collide against his warm flesh.
Then I felt it.
He took control then; Gale's hips moved slowly at first, it was deep and passionate. It took everything out of me to keep quiet, to hold on to whatever virtue I had left. His lips met mine again, he kissed me deeply, I could feel the want and need in every movement he made. It wasn't enough. Once wasn't enough. This will definitely happen again; and I wanted it to.