Crossbow Hearts

“Dear god!” Hershel shouted running forward taking Susie’s limp body from Merle.
“Merle where’s Rachel? Her twin?” I asked deathly calm stepping towards the hallway, but Merle grabbed my arm smearing little Susie’s blood on all over me.
“You don’t want to go down there.” I look at him and even he is pale, I hated to think of what state that little girl’s body must be in. But I needed to see, we needed to get Donna and Alan. We needed to get the fucker that did this.
“What the hell did you do to them!” Rick roared at Merle shoving him. I stepped between them pushing Rick back.
“Rick use your damn head, he didn’t do it. Merle who did this? Did you see?”
“I know who did this,” Lori states as she made her way into the cell block. “That murderer Dexter!” She points her hand at the man in question.
“Lady that’s crazy talk!” He exclaims, Lori just screamed at him calling him a murder, a psycho on and on riling everybody up. Rick tried to calm her as Merle collected himself from being accused of killing a child, I can see the shock begin to turn to anger. Lori is still screeching, my head feels like it’s about to explode, Caleb clings to my leg, he was upset and scared his eyes never leaving the cell to which Hershel had taken little Susie. I can’t take the screaming anymore.
“WILL EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP!” Suddenly the cell block is deathly quiet except for Hershel as he works over little Susie’s body. “Lori did you see Dexter do it?” She shakes her head, no, but then begins to go again, I hold my hand up to shut her up. “Ok so Dexter more than likely didn’t do it. We can’t just go accusing people.”
“Thanks.” Dexter says nodding his head at me.
“Welcome, Merle?” Though I had a creeping suspicion I knew who’d done this.
“I didn’t see it happen, but I saw a guy leave, middle aged, glasses,” That was all Rick and I needed to know as we both looked at each other and moved at the same time.
“I’ll check the exorcise yard!” he shouted as I shouted,
“I’ll check the library!” I blasted down the hallway in a blind rage. I should have done something before I left for Macon, I should’ve warned Donna and Alan, I should’ve put a stop to him there and then. I was so lost in my anger that I didn’t see him step out from a row of book cases. The next thing I knew I was on the floor Thomas’s hands wrapped around my neck as he smashed my head into the floor.
“You dirty little bitch! Filthy slut! Time to take your medicine you fucking whore!” I stopped trying to get his hands from my throat and started to punch him in the head knocking his glasses off. His weight was suddenly gone as Merle yanked him from me. I jumped to my feet and took Thomas down. He pulled out a knife and slashed at me trying to get my face, but I blocked with my arm. I felt the skin on my right forearm split like a banana peel, blood flowing freely. I punched him again feeling my knuckles crunch with amount of force I put into it. His jaw sagged as Merle pulled me from him. Merle only had one hand, but it didn’t make him weak.
“Jamie come off you need to fix that arm.” My struggling against Merle only stopped as Rick flew into the room taking up my position on top of Thomas and proceeding to punch him repeatedly. Merle was pressing a rag to my arm as we both just looked on. I knew I should put a stop to it, but couldn’t bring myself to do it.
“Rick…stop.” I said seeing Thomas’s face resembling tenderised meat. But still neither Merle or I made to stop it. Tyreese and Axel soon arrived and pulled Rick from Thomas as Alan stood in the doorway. Tyreese calmed Rick as Axel came over to try and help with my arm. Alan came in and that’s when I noticed the gun. He pointed it straight at Thomas and I waited with baited breath for the gun to go off, but Alan slowly lowered the gun.
“No. We won’t end your life….like you ended my babies.” Alan choked out. “No we’ll give you to the walkers.”
“Merle I’ll be ok, help Axel take that piece of meat out.” Merle let go of my arm making sure I had hold of the rag first and grabbed Thomas as I kept my arm elevated though it wasn’t doing much to stop the flow of blood. Rick, Tyreese, Alan and myself followed them out to the exorcise yard, a few others coming to see what was happening as Axel and Merle threw Thomas to the walkers. We stood and watched as the walkers tore into him, ripping his flesh from his body. Alan stood gun in hand. I knew he wouldn’t shift until Thomas rose as a walker and he could kill him.
“Jamie come on let’s get you to Hershel and Maggie.” Rick said softly, steering me from the fencing his hand on my shoulder.
After Hershel had done all he could for Susie he stitched my arm up and wrapped it before checking my head out.
“It looks like you might have a concussion, you’re going to need someone to make sure you stay awake or wakes you every hour or so.” I nodded.
“Thanks Hershel, is Susie?”
“I don’t know Jamie, Merle acted fast and I’ve done all I can, it’s up to her now.” He sighed. I walked from the cell Hershel had set up as a makeshift infirmary.
“How’s that arm sugar tits?” Merle asked as I walked into my cell.
“Just peachy.” He stopped me in my tracks.
“Let me give you a little piece of advice Princess. If you were meant to stop it from happening you would have. But you didn’t so it wasn’t meant to be. Don’t blame yourself, it won’t change what’s happened.” I looked at him my eyebrow quirked I guess this was another side to Merle.
“Wow how profound of you.”
“I have my moments sugar tits.” I couldn’t help, but smile as that other side of him quickly vanished. Merle was easy to get on with once you over looked the sexist and racist remarks. He leaned against the opening of my cell.
“You want to move? I need to change my clothes are covered in blood.”
“I don’t mind you go right ahead.” By the teasing tone to his voice I knew he expected me to kick up a fuss. So instead I kicked off my boots, peeled off my combats and my shirt leaving me in just my underwear. I heard Merle cough and his footsteps as he walked away. Well I’ll be damned he was all embarrassed. I put on clean clothes as quickly and carefully as I could, trying to limit movement to my damaged arm. Then I strolled into Daryl’s cell I wanted to see him now everything had calmed down. He was propped up on his pillows glaring at the wall in front of him.
“How you feeling?” I asked his cobalt eyes shifting to rest on me.
“Are you insane? He could have fucking killed you!” He snapped. I raised my bandaged right arm.
“Well it’s a good job he only managed to slash my arm then isn’t it?” I shot back. I suddenly wondered what I was actually doing in here putting up with his attitude. I turned on my heel and made to leave.
“Jamie!” I slowly turned back to him my face blank. “Thanks.” His words threw me as yet again he was being a total jerk off one second and calm the next.
“What for?”
“Antibiotics, finding my brother.” He replied awkwardly.
“Yeah you won’t be thanking her soon you little faggot!” Merle barked coming into the cell. “They leave me for dead on top of that department store, your brother, your own flesh and blood and you don’t do anything? You get your sorry ass shanked by some fucking nigger and the icing on the cake? You actually are a fag, a puff, a giant fucking pansy. Aww what’s wrong Princess fag? Truth hurt?” I was going to leave and let them go at it, but I couldn’t let Merle just rip into Daryl like this.
“Merle…”
“You disgust me faggot! She’s got more balls than you have and I can tell you she is all woman!” I flushed pink maybe stripping off like I had wasn’t a great idea.
“Come on Merle back off.” I said stepping in between him and Daryl who was glaring up at him from the bed.
“Got her fighting your battles too you damn pussy!” He spat and I slapped him.
“I am not fighting his battles, I’m stopping you from being a complete fucking asshole! If I knew you’d be like this I’d have left you back in Macon.”
“Like hell you would you crazy fucking bitch!” I turned looking at Daryl in shock, I took in a deep breath mustering as much dignity as I could.
“Well fuck you too, I’m a take my crazy ass out of here you can sort your own fagotty ass self out!” I snapped and left heading to the exorcise yard.
~Daryl~
I watched her walk away feeling like the biggest fucking prick in the universe. She’d stood there and listened to Merle insult me for as long as she could. I saw her getting annoyed, then angry and when she sticks up for me, defends my sorry ass I lash out at her. What the fuck was wrong with me?
“You baby brother are a moron you fucking fag.” Merle said his lip curled up in disgust.
“Shut the fuck up!” I shot back at him.
“I don’t go for all this mushy bull crap, but damn can’t you see what’s in front of you? When she realised that she still had those antibiotics she flipped would have run all the way back here to get them to you if we hadn’t of grabbed her. Then Mark pulled the pack from her and she exploded. Now why do you think that?”
“Simple cos she’s fucking crazy!” But I knew that wasn’t true and I just made myself feel lower than I already did.
“No you fucking dumb ass little shit, she’s in fucking love with you! You no good ungrateful snivelling prick.” That knocked me for six, but I knew she cared, but in love with me a no good red neck?
“That’s a load of bullshit.”
“Why’s that because you’re just as big an asshole as I am? That you’re a fag? Or because you just don’t see what a girl like her sees in you? A fagotty ass prick with balls the size of peanuts!”
“I ain’t a damn fag! And Jamie wouldn’t be alive if I hadn’t saved her crazy ass three times now!” I shouted holding three fingers up to stress my point.
“So fucking what? Seems to me she saved your worthless ass almost as much. And at least she’s grateful.” I knew this would go on for hours it wasn’t often Merle liked anyone, but when he did, he looked out for them and tended to get like this.
“Daryl…” I looked behind my brother to see Caleb.
“What do you want kid?” Merle reached out and slapped me upside the head,
“Hey there little man, he meant to say what’s wrong?” The kid looked to be struggling with something.
“I saw Jamie crying, Maggie asked what was wrong, but she just stormed off and climbed up the guard tower. Daryl why is Jamie crying? Jamie hasn’t cried since Garth and Carol.” As if I couldn’t feel shitter than I already did, this kid just made it happen. But what the hell could I do? I couldn’t say I liked her back? Hell I could, but I couldn’t walk to her even if I wanted to. Besides it’s her fault. If she’d…oh who was I kidding? If she didn’t do the things she did then she wouldn’t be Jamie.
“That’s my fault little man. I said some things I didn’t mean.” I sighed reaching out and ruffling his hair, but he just pulls away.
“Why say it then? Jamie doesn’t say things she doesn’t mean. Jamie’s always nice to you! Why can’t you be nice to her?” He half shouted. I smiled to myself, he was so angry all because I had upset Jamie.
“Hey come on little man, leave my brother to stew in his own mess. You can show me around.” Merle sent me a glare as Caleb’s attention quickly turned to my brother.
“Ok c’mon.” He smiled motioning him from my cell.
“Nice one Dixon shove her out of your life too.” I snapped at myself. God damn why did I have to be such a prick?! I punched the wall in my anger, but all that served was to hurt my fucking knuckles. I needed to talk to her away from everyone else. On top of that guard tower was a good place, but I wasn’t sure I could make it. I sat up feeling my stitches pull, but they didn’t give. Now all I had to do was stand and get to the guard tower. Easier said than done. 10 agonising minutes later, my side felt like it was on fire, but I was at the base of the guard tower. It had quickly spread that I must be the reason for Jamie being upset so everyone left me to it as I crossed the yard. I pulled myself up rung by rung. I was a foot away from the landing when it occurred to me she might not be up here and that those fuckers down there wouldn’t have told me if she had come down.
“Jamie?!” I shouted praying I hadn’t done all this to find she wasn’t there.
“The fuck do you want?” She snapped, but then there was movement and her head popped over the side. “Daryl! And you say I’m fucking crazy? You’re going to seriously hurt yourself!” She shouted trying to be angry, but she couldn’t hide the concern in her voice. She helped me up onto the landing.
“You have any idea how fucking hard this was?” Her eyes darkened.
“I never asked you to come up here, I came up here to get away from you!” She snapped. “I don’t know why I bother with you! You’re a complete ass to me 90% of the time!” I looked anywhere but at her.
“I know.”
“I helped look after you for three days, fed you, brought you water, hell I helped bathe you! I drive all the way to Macon, just to get some antibiotics for you and bring your, racist and sexist brother back. After been attacked by his fucking group and all I get is a fuck you crazy bitch?!” She growled pacing past me as I lean against the side of the towers hut. I didn’t know what to say as she continued to pace. So I take action instead. I catch hold of her wrist as she goes by and pull her to me. “What the hell are you,” I crash my lips down on hers hoping I’ve done the right thing.