Cadaverous

I did as Aaron said and managed to shower and do my hair. I wore the least form fitting outfit I could find, to maybe give the illusion that I was thinner than I was in actuality. Tight skinny jeans with a very loose fitting tank top that fell to about mid-thigh. I curled the longer side of my asymmetrical hair and pinned the other into a sort of up do. My make up gave the appearance that it was light, but was actually caked on to make my skin look decent no matter what angle the light hit me.

I did decide one thing; I wasn’t leaving this room until Oliver and his friends were here. I didn’t want to have to face Aaron alone. The only downside was that almost no body knew about the real him, not even Oliver, to whom I’d told everything. I heard the music begin and the hollering of boys downstairs, alerting me that Aaron’s friends had showed up. I clutched my phone and awaited some signal.

My heart jumped a bit when my ringtone went off. Before the first ring finished I immediately held the phone up to my ear. “Hello?”

“Well ‘ello,” an English accent chuckled. I heard a few voices in the background that I recognized and smiled. “Tha’ was quick.”

I ignored his statement. “Where are you?”

“Jus’ pulled up.” Car doors slammed that were echoed just half a second later out the window. I noticed the voices around him disintegrate. “Yeh alrigh’, love? Yeh sound bothered.”

“I’ll meet you downstairs.” And with that, I ended the call and shoved the phone into my back pocket as I jumped to my feet and raced down the stairs. Well, at least until the stop of the staircase. The traffic inside had already forced the room packed. I politely maneuvered down all the stairs through the groups of women, although my jealousy had already gotten me so anxious I thought I’d collapse. There were a few faint knocks at the door and with a smile, I tugged it open, staring at the group outside. Immediately, my face fell.

“Elle!” Oliver shouted as he raised one arm to pull me into a half hug, the other attached to Amanda’s. I halfheartedly returned it before he backed away. As always, he looked stunning. Black skinnies, gray v-neck, and a black beanie to manage his disheveled hair. And then, there was Amanda.

Size zero, 5’10”, perfect waving brown hair down to her midsection, and the most flawless pale skin I’d ever seen. She was, saying the least, very intimidating. She smirked at me in a friendly manner before saying hello.

“Uh, hi, Amanda,” I greeted, rubbing the back of my neck nervously. I then went on to invite them and the others in. At least I was good friends with Oliver’s band. As they made their way into the kitchen, I pulled the one named Matt aside away from the others. “Matt,” I started severely.

“Yeh good?” he asked wearily, noting the frazzled look I must have been sporting. I blinked a few times and pulled him into a hug. “Is it him again?” he asked, holding me tight. Matt was the only who knew about Aaron. I had accidently spilled an event that happened when I was drunk beyond recognition at a party one night. It took three people to keep Matt off of Aaron once I relayed to him what had happened that morning of Aaron holding me to the ground with his knee in my chest. He had lost it after accusing me of eating “everything but the cheese” and forced a huge chunk of Velveeta down my throat. All I could do was nod. “Did he hurt you?” His voice was level but stern.

“No,” I breathed, trying to keep my composure as I felt his backbone stiffen.

“Shayelle,” a figure behind me spoke. Matt didn’t loosen his grip as I could only imagine the stares being exchanged. I knew by the use of my full name who it was. I slowly pried myself out of Matt’s arms as I turned around to face Aaron. His stunning sea green eyes met mine, but his face was still. “About time you got down here.”

“Sorry,” I whispered as I kept my head low. Matt put an arm around my and smiled, showing off his famous dimples in an attempt to lighten the mood.

“Oi! Shay we didn’ come ‘ere to bicker, let’s drink!” he announced. By now, Aaron was fuming that another man had his hands on me, even if done in an innocent manner. I tried to shrug his shoulder off, but he wasn’t letting go. “If I know yeh, Aaron, an’ trust me,” he said through smoldering eyes. “I do. It mean’s yeh got booze, yeah?” Aaron crossed his arms and stood in front of us, his frame overwhelming Matt’s. “Got any Jack?”

“I’m sure we do,” I said quickly as I pulled away from his grip and bee lined my way to the kitchen where I noticed the rest of his band. I peered over my shoulder to make sure it was only Matt following me. Aaron had become preoccupied with Tyson in some sort of conversation and I sighed in relief. As I turned, my nose collided with a near protruding spine and forced me backwards. At least Matt was there to catch me from stumbling over. “Fuck!” I shouted as I tilted my head towards Matt. “Is it bleeding?” He shook his head but still looked a second time anyway.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorreh!” Amanda gasped as she turned around and reached out for me. She held me by my wrists and got my posture to straighten as I kept pressure on my nose, still not entirely convinced it wasn’t bleeding. “Are yeh alrigh’?”

“I’m fine,” I said monotonously. Her eyebrows furrowed into confusion and worry as she moved my hand to observe herself. I internally sighed and rolled my eyes. Not only was she drop dead beautiful, she was a princess and a saint.

“Yeh look like yeh check out, love,” she breathed in relief as she smiled. “Again, sorreh.”

“I’m good,” I nodded, reaching past her for a particular bottle of liquor and a liter of Coca-Cola. “Hey, Oliver, can you grab me two cups?”

He checked around his shoulder to see who was calling him and saw me, immediately brightening up. He clutched onto my wrist and pulled me into him, not in a sexual manner, but to be close enough to hear me. “Wha’d yeh say? Sorreh, it’s loud.”

“I just needed a cup,” I shrugged as I grabbed them myself, now being close enough to do so. “Thanks though."
“Hey, we still ‘ave shit to discuss later,” he said in all seriousness, creeping closer to my ear. “Yeh can’t ‘ide thin’s from meh. Okay?”

“I’m not hiding anything,” I said simply as I tried to wriggle my way out of the overly packed kitchen. Once against, I bumped into a body, but a chest of a man at near six feet tall. I stared up at Aaron and tried to smile while keeping the three things I had in hand from falling. “Oh hey, Aaron. Sorry about taking so long upstairs.”

“You’re fine,” he replied before pulling me into a hug. I tried my best to give one back, practically glowing from butterflies in my stomach. He turned just barely to speak into my hair. “Maybe you should go with diet coke tonight. Take a look at Oli’s girl.” With that, he gave me a quick kiss and a grin before turning around to grab his own liquor. “Love you, Shay. I’ll be with Ty in the living room.”

“Kay,” I croaked as I felt my knees start to tremble. Oliver had to have noticed because instantly my hands were empty and I was now being lifted into the air and carried out of the room. My chest hurt, I could feel anxiety building deep within. I couldn’t believe he said that. I noticed whoever was carrying me had started up the stairs, shouting rude things to the people blocking his path. Before I knew it, the bathroom door slammed shut and I was placed up on the sink like a little kid. My eyes were trained to the floor at Oliver’s Vans. I didn’t feel I had the strength to lift them.

“Shayelle.” He spoke with irritability. A rough hand grabbed my chin and forced me to watch his eyes. His eyes, identical of Aaron’s, met mine that were already beginning to spill with tears. “Did ‘e say wha’ I fink ‘e said?” I raised one shoulder in a shrug as I focused on regaining my stature. “Talk to me, please.”

I took a single deep breath before pulling away from his hand. “I think you heard him wrong.”

He pulled his beanie off and scrunched it in his hands in frustration. He watched it for a moment before sighing. “I ‘eard ‘im perfectly okay,” he said lowly. “Fuckin’ twat. Yeh don’ say tha’ to anyone, ‘specially yeh’re own bird! Amanda could gain fifty pounds an’ I wouldn’t fink twice of it!”

“That’s because she never will, right?” I asked helplessly as I met eye contact with him, tears still brimming to the edge. His mouth stiffened and he pulled me into a tight hug. I desperately hugged back, even using my nails until he mentioned something about it.

There was a long silence between us before he spoke. “He’s the reason yeh changed, yeah? E’s the reason yeh hate yerself…” he trailed off, still holding onto me. I refused to speak, just nodded. He held the embrace just seconds longer before backing away. “Yeh don’t need to lose weight. Yeh’re proper tiny as it is. It’s dangerous.”

“Don’t worry about me,” I smiled, wiping the smeared makeup from beneath my eyelids. “I’m not doing anything stupid.”

His eyes showed his disbelief and his stone face proved it. But he decided to drop it, thankfully. “C’mon, let’s get some drinks. Yeh’re not drinkin’ diet either, yeh fuckin’ twig.”

I slapped at his chest to be friendly and giggled. “Shut it.”

We rejoined everyone else in the kitchen, though Oliver and Matt were huddled in a corner speaking to each other frantically. Lee poured me a Jack and coke, heavy on the Jack as I watched their eyes dart from Aaron, to the others, then back. Not good.

“Oi, Shay,” Lee called, nudging me with his elbow. I thanked him and delicately cupped the drink nearly overflowing with liquor. “Take a drink wiff me?” He smiled innocently with round cheeks. I couldn’t help but feel happier when he smiled at me.

I nodded. “Of course. Cheers.” We touched cups, just barely because of how much liquid we both had, and chugged it down to the halfway mark, a tradition of me and all the others from the band. I scrunched my face up as I realized that there was maybe a fifth of soft drink in mine. He snickered coyly, obviously knowing that he’d proportioned it poorly. “Jesus, Lee!”

“Yeh need to ‘ave a good night. Just ‘ere to help!” he yelled over the music before reaching around to pull me into a half hug. And he was definitely right. The alcohol hit me hard and left me feeling warm and smiling like an idiot. I was calming down, becoming more comfortable, even with the lean runway model chatting my ear off. I did catch her looking over my shoulder a couple times with a raised eyebrow and the most recent time she did, she held an eerie expression.

“Do yeh know tha’ guy?” she asked me. “The one wiff the black skate shirt and brown hair?” I didn’t turn around. I immediately recognized her description. “’e keeps lookin’ at me funny then talkin’ to his friend.”

I took another swig of my drink with no intention to look. “His friend kind of Mexican looking with a white hat?” She just nodded. “Nope, no idea who he is.” Aaron. I couldn’t be surprised, I suppose. He definitely didn’t have eyes solely for me. She cocked an eyebrow, looking as if she were about to speak again

“Shay! Amanda!” a shrill voice called. She whirled around to face the commotion as the five boys she’d arrived with stood near the counter, seven shots poured. We recognized Lee as the voice. “Shot time, yeah?”

I rushed over gladly, grateful to relieve the anxiety and awkwardness of our conversation. I grabbed the one that looked most full, though I was already having some trouble keeping myself upright.

“Can I join?” a voice asked as two arms slid around my midsection. I immediately felt self-conscious as fingers gripped around my fat and a chuckle echoed in my voice. I smelled alcohol on Aaron’s breath as he pecked my cheek. Amanda seemed very bothered and almost said something as she grabbed her shot glass as well.

“Sorry mate,” Matt spoke harshly. “Only seven poured.”

“We have more somewhere,” he started, searching out the counter and even sink for empty glasses.

“Only seven poured,” Oliver finished for him, uncrossing his arms and stepping forward once.

“Shay, why are your friends such dicks?” he spoke towards me, though intending it to be heard throughout the group. “This is why I don’t like them over. It’s my fucking house and my fucking alcohol.”

“Actually, love, we brought our own,” Amanda spoke sweetly as her fingers interlaced with mine. I was still struggling to swallow the lump in my throat. “An’ we’re tryin’ to make it last between us.”

Aaron seemed surprised she spoke to him and smiled at her. I could immediately feel Oliver fuming as he draped an arm around Amanda and pulled her into him, in sequence pulling me along with. She didn’t plan on letting go of my hand. It forced Aaron’s arms apart and for a split second, I could see fury in his eyes. I released her hand and turned to him, placing a hand lightly on his chest.

“I’m drinking diet, okay?” I managed to smile weakly, saying what I knew he wanted to hear. “I’ll be over there soon, just need to take this with my friends. Don’t worry about them, they’re just drunk.” He didn’t say anything, just kept eye contact with Oliver as he backed up, still sizing him up with his posture. It seemed like forever before he actually turned around to head to a different room.

“Fuckin’ twat!” Amanda was the first to announce it, reaching for my hand again. I lazily let gravity keep it in place, pretending I didn’t notice her reaching for me. Instead I held my shot glass in the air.

“What to, guys?” I asked loudly, playing off what had just happened as no big deal, although I felt an urge to cry building up in me. Definitely not now.

Everyone watched me wearily, especially Matt and Oliver, but they also grabbed their own glasses and held them up. “To friends?” Curtis asked drunkenly. We all agreed and downed our drinks.

I felt the stare of Oliver on me for the remainder of the night. Or at least what I could remember of it.