The Core

Lark walked into the kitchen the next morning, to a rather dull lighting. She often considered Taylon’s home to be dull, but the present lighting made it look even worse. She walked to the window and pushed the faded blue curtain aside to see thick flurries of snow falling. She looked up; the sky was almost all white. Lark turned then to the footsteps that echoed across the kitchen floor.

Taylon’s eyes were squinted from sleep and his hair stuck up in awkward patches. He stretched his muscular arms and grabbed a blanket from the couch to throw over his half-naked body. “Lark?” He asked, voice groggy. “Why are you awake?” He moved towards her, slipping his arms around her and pulling her close. His skin was cold and her radiating body heat brought a small smile to slide onto his face.

“I don’t know,” she said. She could not find the words to explain the foreboding feeling she had in her stomach. “I just couldn’t sleep,” she added, sliding closer to him. He felt how tense she was, however. He brought his hands to her neck and rubbed it softly. “Stop it,” she breathed.

“Tell me what’s wrong, Lark. Stop keeping secrets from me,” he whispered. He wanted nothing more than to know everything that burdened her so he could take the weight off of her. She, in turn, wanted nothing more than to tell him everything and lighten the load, but old habits die hard. Lark lightly bit her lip before sighing and turning towards him.

She lifted her hand to his face, running her fingers through the scruff of hair on his chin. She smiled slightly, a sad look in her eyes. “I have a terrible feeling,” she whispered, “I just think that they’re planning something. I haven’t figured out what yet.” She sighed, frustrated with herself for not being able to get in their mindset. Had she really been gone that long? The starvation was easy to figure out, but what are they planning now? The nagging feeling in her stomach made her flop her head onto Taylon’s chest. “It’s rather frustrating that I can’t put the pieces together,” she added.

He sighed also, lifting her face up from his chest. The smell of soap and fire wood lingered around her. “No one is asking you to, Lark. We’ve gotten this far without knowing,” he said. Although he brought up a very good point, Lark merely shook her head. She bit her lip and pulled away from him, walking back to look out the window.

“You don’t understand, Taylon. Before it was smaller attacks, but it hasn’t been working. Not enough people have died. Don’t you understand? Something bigger is coming and I refuse to sit around and wait for it to come? I’m not a coward; I will face this head on. However, I’m not going in blind,” she said, closing her eyes in thought.

He chuckled slightly, “What are you going to do? Write them a letter?”

She rolled her eyes at his humor. Most of the time, Lark enjoyed Taylon’s humor because it reminded her that some things can be light hearted and fun. Yet, at this moment, his humor made him seem rather naïve. She didn’t understand how he could joke at a time like this. “I hardly think this is the time to joke,” she muttered.

He walked over to her, closing the curtain for it was the source of her distraction. He rubbed her arms lightly when his playful smirk returned to his face. There was a rustle in the bedrooms and crying echoing from the baby’s room. “I hardly think this a time for talking,” he mocked, “I can think of a few things to use our time with.” He winked playfully and she pushed him away in the same manner.

“You are absolutely horrible,” she said, laughing.

He pulled her to his chest then, grabbing her leg and wrapping it around his body. “Maybe so, but you love it. Therefore! I shall remain this way,” he said, spinning her around the room in some sort of dance. She laughed loudly and for once, forgot all about The Core and relaxed in this moment. It seemed that she always had the The Core on her mind and she finally let herself live a little. It was in this moment, she really did feel free. Lark found it funny that this feeling would come over her at such a random and dismal morning.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” He asked, cocking a brow.

She shook her head smiling as he released her leg and she landed on her two feet again. She moved closer to him, as close she could physically be. The only layer between their chests was her own clothing for Taylon’s blanket had fallen off. “Kiss me,” she breathed.

Taylon was admittedly surprised, but not surprised enough to not oblige. His stomach did a small flip before he followed through on her request, pressing his lips hungrily against hers. For once, she wasn’t reluctant to kiss back because she no longer had to worry about The Core breathing down her neck. In fact, she barely knew how much longer she had before they barged into Palimea and killed everyone. She just needed to complete this moment; she needed this one thing.

“Well, good morning,” Rhiana said, laughing. Lark jumped away from Taylon as if he was on fire and her cheeks turned bright red. “Oh, please. Don’t mind me. I was just going to ask if you didn’t mind staying home with me today, Lark. But, do continue. I’ll close my eyes,” she said, winking.

“Mom,” Taylon whined.

“No, Rhiana. I wouldn’t mind at all. What about Helena?” She asked, glancing towards the baby room. Her stomach had done three turns and she felt like her heart was in throat. She had never been so thoroughly embarrassed in her entire life. Her cheeks were so hot she felt like they were just going to burn up her whole face, which wouldn’t be a bad idea.

“Don’t Mom me, Taylon. You’re twenty-two! I know very well what you did with Charece,” she said, winking again. Taylon turned and ruffled his hair in the same amount of embarrassment Lark was feeling. “As for your question, Lark, Helena is going to town to sell some things. So, we’ll prepare food and the boys will hunt. So, I’d get dressed, Taylon.” She said, her motherly tone returning and she casted him a look of disdain. She then moved into the baby’s room to take Melaoney from her.

All the men in the house and Helena all left at the same time; Taylon and Andor to hunt, Lyrius to work and Helena to town. Left alone in the house, Lark and Rhiana tidied the kitchen and took care of the children. “You’re awfully good with children,” Rhiana commented as Lark cradled Tyrion in her arms as he drifted to sleep.

Lark detested such a comment, but chose not to reflect it and instead nodded politely. She laid the sleeping child down on the couch and smiled softly. To an extent, she was jealous of him and his innocence. She longed so badly to even have had the normal childhood that Tyrion has. She wished with all her being that she had not ever been a part of the Core and she could have been normal. This sudden thought surprised Lark for she had never thought she would ever utter that
adjective about herself: normal.

When both the children were laid down and sleeping, Lark and Rhiana began busying themselves
around the kitchen. “Care to try the cornbread again?” Rhiana asked, holding out the ingredients. Lark, with an exasperated sigh, took the supplies from her. She was determined to tackle such a simple task for its completion evaded her for too long. “You know what you’re doing?” Rhiana said, raising a brow.

“Yes,” Lark retorted. “I know exactly what to do.”

Rhiana began cleaning the meat that the boys caught yesterday, removing each feather thoroughly. She became completely absorbed in her work. Behind her, Lark sloshed eggs and flour about, covering herself in the white dust. She pushed the pan into the oven with a feeling of slight accomplishment and a smear of flour across her forehead from wiping the sweat off. She opened the oven and smiled when she retrieved the golden bread from the fire.

“Rhiana!” She exclaimed, childishly clapping her hands together. “Look!” She pointed a delicate hand to the corn bread as the elder woman turned and smiled. Lark had never felt so much success in her entire life and she enveloped her adopted mother into her arms. Rhiana laid a kiss onto Lark’s forehead and smiled.

“I’m very proud of you. You’d make a wonderful wife,” she said, releasing Lark. Lark smiled softly, flattered to have received such a description, but confused as to why Rhiana would put it in such a way. “If you know, you were planning on marrying,” she said, turning back to her work. At that moment, Lark sighed finally noting Rhiana’s intentions.

“Taylon and I are not getting married,” she said firmly. Rhiana said nothing for the disappointment
she felt was ineffable. She was sure the letdown was evident in her eyes and Lark avoided them like the plague. Lark could not see herself being married to anyone; it was not what she wanted with her life. She chuckled a little at herself because being married would be normal, something she had just wished for. She shook her head for her mind was a conflicted place, trying to mesh together two very different worlds.

“So never?” Rhiana finally asked, breaking the silence. “You don’t want to be with him nor have kids?” She asked, trying to wrap her own mind around the subject. She was quite aware that Lark was different from the rest of them, but she never really noticed the rift until now. Lark herself attempted to try to understand why Rhiana was pressing this. “I just,” the older woman sighed, “If we come out of this or even if only you and Taylon do.” She stopped there, the realization of the statement sunk in slightly. “If only you and Taylon make it, you will be all he has and honestly, you are all he wants.”

“That isn’t how it works for me,” Lark said, quietly.

“Yes, but that was the old you. Lark, this is a whole new world. Will you open yourself up to the possibility of change? You may enjoy it,” Rhiana said, trailing off. She walked over to the baby that began cooing and Lark sighed, leaning against the table. “I just think you deserve better than this righteous life you feel you must lead. You’re human, Lark.”

Lark slammed her hands on the counter, “No, I’m not. Have you missed that? I’m not human, I’m not from Palimea! I can’t just take what you say and change my whole outlook on life? I am, or was I suppose, an Advisor from The Core. I was made to be a higher being that didn’t fall to worldly temptations and feelings. I was not made to sit at home and cook and clean and nurse children. I was made for something different from this,” Lark hollered, lowering her voice to the end.

Rhiana was silent at that moment for she had never been so thoroughly insulted by Lark. For one small moment, she saw what Helena saw when Lark first arrived. “I see,” she muttered before leaving and settling into the bedroom with the baby and Tyrion.

Left alone to her thoughts, Lark crumpled behind the counter and did her best not to cry. She did not mean to, by any means, to insult Rhiana. She just needed to make a point and perhaps she did not do it in the best manner. “Lark?” Taylon said, walking into the kitchen and standing over her with a practically empty game bag.

Lark wiped her eyes quickly and stood. “Yes, I’m sorry. I’m up,” she said. She took the bag from him and brought it to the cleaning table. His arms encircled her waist and he rested his head in the nook of her shoulders. She tensed at his touch for she could not be comfortable with this after what Rhiana divulged.

“Are you alright?” He asked, concern coating his voice.

She nodded, “I’m fine; just feeling a little sick. I think I’ll just go lay down.” She walked away from him then, his arms sliding off of her body. It had been awhile since she had felt so utterly alone and she shrunk into her cot, listening to the hustle bustle of the house. She heard the family laughing and joking and she finally noted that perhaps this wasn’t where she belonged.

A stream of light entered the room and Taylon’s shadow moved towards Lark. She shifted her weight and turned towards the wall. “Lark,” he whispered, “My mom told me about what happened. I want you to know I wasn’t rushing you into anything. I want you to be happy, with or without me.” He gulped then. “I love you, though.”

Lark turned around slowly, “What?”