Close Your Eyes to See.

John walked back into the room, his head pounding as he ran his fingers through his hair. He noticed the girl in bed completely awake. He let out a sigh before taking a seat on the bed. He let his hands run down her legs, tracing shapes into her skin.

“Why are you with me?”

“What do you mean?”

He watched her sit up in the single bed they shared. “Why are you with me?” she felt her throat closing in. “I’m hardly a good girlfriend. I can’t do things normal girlfriends could do. I’m so needy and I just don’t satisfy you the way that you could.”

“Where is this coming from?”

“I heard her.”

John closed his eyes running his fingers through his hair. “She’s just jealous babe.”

“She’s right.”

He shook his head licking his lips. He noticed the tears falling down her face. He reached over rubbing his thumb against the salt water falling from her gray eyes.

“Listen to me-“

“That’s all I could do,” she said letting the tears stream down at a more rapid pace. “I can’t see you John. I can’t see your beautiful eyes, your beautiful smile. I can’t see any of that. Why would you want to be with me?!” she cried out not knowing that John himself was tearing up.

He could bear to see her cry. He wouldn’t take it. He inhaled a deep breath to make sure his voice wasn’t shaky.

“Autumn, you’re amazing. You’re the best thing to ever walk into my life. I don’t care if you can’t see the color of my eyes or my terrible and awkward smile. No one could ever make me feel the way that you make me feel. You make me feel happy. Happiest I have ever felt. When I see your smile everything that might have went wrong in my day suddenly didn’t seem like anything at all. Every day that I don’t see your smile or hear that sweet voice of yours, I go crazy. When I’m off on tour the only thing I want to see is you,” he said grabbing her tear stained face. “I love you so much Autumn. I love you more than anything in this entire world. You’re the most beautiful thing in the world. You satisfy me more than you will ever know.”

“John?”

“Yes baby?”

“Do you mean it?”

“With my whole heart,” he said pressing his lips against hers softly. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too.”


John sat there in the waiting room his body pulsing with anxiety. His foot bouncing up and down as his nails became a bit of a buffet of nerves. He foot bounced to an unsteady rhythm in his head. This had been the third trip to the hospital already. The first two were not successful. Each time he visited his beautiful girlfriend then more and more she was in pain. Every light was the enemy. She lost faith that she would ever see again. John felt his heart break the moment tears fell from her eyes pleading with the doctors to fix her.

“John, honey,” he heard Autumn’s mother’s sweet voice ring through the busy waiting room.

He looked up feeling his heart race out of his chest. He noticed the tears in her eyes. Her face red and tear stained. He instantly jumped from his seat to the older woman. His heart was racing and the only thoughts running through his head were nothing good.

“Is she okay?” he asked frantic. “What’s going on?”

She said nothing but gave him a warm face. She grabbed a hold of his hand and led her down the hallway to the room Autumn was in. He felt his heart beat with every step they made. His hands were clammy and his stomach was queasy. She let him into the room and he darted his eyes to the beautiful girl standing there being hugged by her father. John raised an eyebrow in confusion while running his fingers through his hair.

“Autumn?” he asked out to get the beautiful girls attention.

Soon he watched the girl’s body freeze. He watched her inch out of her father’s arm and turn to face him. He instantly looked directly into her eyes. He felt his heart beat out of his chest, she was looking at him.

“John?”

He felt a tear fall from his eyes. John was stuck in his place with his hands shoved deep into his jeans. He licked his dry lips watching her take steps closer. His heart was racing and he couldn’t take it. She let a wide smile spread to her lips as her cold hand was placed on his cheek.

“You’re beautiful.”

John instantly felt his whole body collapse as the tears fell down his face. He wrapped his strong arms around the girl pulling her tight into his chest. He held here there for a few seconds before Autumn pulled away, tears in her own eyes. She brought her cold hand to his face once again. Her fingertips grazing his skin like she had done many times before.

“You said your eyes are green.”

He let out a laugh. “That’s what green looks like darling.”

“But they have specks of yellow.”

He licked his lips with a smile feeling her fingertips fall down his check to his jawbone. “Those girls were right,” she said with a smile. “You are gorgeous,” she said as John couldn’t help but to let out a soft chuckle fall from his throat.

“You’re the gorgeous one, baby.”

She smiled up at him and there his smile went. “You do have a beautiful smile,” she said as her fingertips grazed his lips.

“I’m so fucking happy.”

And before she knew it, his lips were pressed against hers. It was a sweet kiss that held so many emotions. They didn’t care about the nurses watching with tears in their eyes, watching the two like it was some kind of romance film. They didn’t care about Autumn’s crying parents holding each other with such happiness in the tears they cried. They didn’t care about any of that; they only cared about each other. When they pulled away from each other completely breathless with foreheads pressed tightly against one another.

“I love you.”

“I love you too babe,” he said with a smile. “I just wished I would have done my hair or something.”

“You look beautiful.”

“You’re the beautiful one,” he said kissing her lips tenderly. “Am I what you thought I was going to be or am I a disappointment?”

She just chuckled closing her eyes softly and letting them flutter back open to meet his eyes. “Even better baby,” she said with a smile. “My eyes can't look at you any other way.”