Help Me Live

[[okay, this is in mikey p.o.v but the flash back is going to be in jades to tell you the story., confusing? yesh, but i think you guys can handle this]]

FlashBack

It was about 2 years ago last time i saw Zacky. He was one of lauryn friends but one of my best friends, she said she had a bad vibe about him and stuff, but i just liked him because he was cute and the only guy who talked to me like i was human. It was during school though, my dad wouldnt let boys over, he said im not pretty enough to like, or even talk to.

Zacky came up to me and greeted me with a hug.
"hey there beautiful" he smiled at me, oh how i loved that smile.

"hey there gorgeous, what up?" i smiled back at him.

"ahh nothing, totally bummed though." he pouted.

"porque?" i asked

"ha whats 'porque'?" he asked me

"it means because, like your bummed because ..? that kind of thing. so no more spanglish around Zacky. haha okay tell me why your bummed" i smiled at him.

"uh! that is so mean!" he faked shocked.

"and so is bunnies and rainbows. now tell" i said to him laughing.

"fine. but DO NOT FREAK. mmkay there babe?" he asked me.

"promise" i said.

"okay.. well i like this girl" he said.
I just felt my heart rip right in two.
"continue" i choked out

"ok. well i known her for about a good year and a half, and i think im falling for her" he sighed. yup, deffinately two pieces. fabulous.

"oh.." i said after a good 5 minutes
"whats her name?" i asked

"jade" he looked at me then the ground.
ah! its back to one!

"wh...wha......" i was lost "what?"

"you promised you wont freak" he said again.

"yeah. i know im not" i said and looked at him.
"but seriously? like with everything wrong with me..how could you like this?" i looked down at my self then back at him.

"how could i not?" he asked me

"well. for starters im ugly 2) im fat and ugly 3) my family 4)-" he cut me off by kissing me, and yes that was my first kiss at 13. and it was a goooooood kiss.

"jade, shut up. your perfect." he smiled at me.

"wow." i said in a daze.

"yeah i know," he said and looked at me.
"im soory. i shouldn't of had done that" he said looking at the ground.

"ah.. no! its..its great...seriously.. like you have not know how long i waited for that, i just... wow... is this a dream of something?" i asked and pinched my arm.
"no..wow" i said again.

"pfft tell me about it i thought you would kick me in the balls and scream 'i hope you cant reproduce' at me" he did a laug and a sigh.

"pfft, i would if i didnt like you" i laughed.

"you like me?" he smiled.

"did i kick you?" i asked him

"no.?" he said.

"then theres your answer" i smiled at him

"sweet" he sighed happily.

"jade.!" lauryn called over.

"oh hey" i said as she sat next to me.

"jad..uh...do-....uhmm.." she was out of breath.

"what?" i asked rasing a eye brow.

"jade.. om......um.. your dad....." she started to cry.

"what?!!? what lauryn what about my dad?" i thought he hurt her.

"i dont know how to tell you this" she was calming down now. thats good.

"lauryn.tell.me.now" i held her sholders.

"uhmmm..im so so sorry jade!! i tried to stop him!!" is cryed into my chest.

"lauryn! tell me god damn it! your scaring me!" i yelled at her.

"okay..well your dad. HE KILLED CANCER!" she cried harder.

"not cancer" i was crying now.
"how!?" i asked

"he ran over him with his car" she waild

okay, if you want to know cancer is my dog. when we got him he had cancer so at the time if fit, he passed it and was the best dog ever, and now he is dead. the one dog i ever had and ever will have was gone, due to a thing called 'Father'.
just peachy.

"thats it!!" i got up and ran to my house only to meet a drunken mom and dad.

"what the fuck is wrong with you!?" i screamed at them

"dont you talk like that to me you whore!" my dad slured and slapped me across the face.

"what are you?" i cleched my teath and kicked him in the leg and tried to get up, but he over came me and kept on kicking and hitting me.

Its a wonder how i got out of there, lauryn and zacky came by and saw me there with my father over me and screaming 'you just a whore, no one loves you. your better of dead'.
yeah.. just the way to meet my family on the week days.

"JADE!!" lauryn screamed and sat beside me.
"is anything broken?" she asked as she searched my body for any cuts or breaks.

"i dont think so, but my stomich hurts alot" i wezed out.

"shit, i think you might get alot of bruses tommorow" she said as she got me up to my room.

Zacky came in after her and just staied quite.

"what happened?" lauryn asked me

"i asked him why he killed cancer and then he went crazy." i cried out.

"fucking bitch, i swear i'll kill him one day" lauryn said to me as she got me to my bed.

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1 and a half year later
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things got worse at home for jade but she got closer withZacky, Lauryn kept a watchfull eye on her to make sure everything was okay but after a few weeks her parents made her move to the other side of town to go to a private school, so all jade had left was Zacky and memories.
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"so.. do you want to go to the dance with me?" zacky asked me as we walked to school

"the dance thats tonight?" i asked him

"yeah, since you know i was wondering if you wanted to go with me or something, you dont have to though" he smiled at me

"ofcourse i would love to go with you" i said and kissed him and went to class.
The rest of the day went by fast untill lunch.

"hey there beautiful" zacky said as i sat down

"hola mi amigio" i smiled at him

"doing spanish now?" he grinned

"more like spanigish" i grinned back.

"so what time you want me to pick you up?" he asked me as he looked around the lunch room and settling his gaze on the jocks and nodding his head.

"uh... i guess 7:30 since it startes at 8 right?" i asked

"hu? oh yeah. okay 7:30 it is" he gave me a kiss on the cheek and went to go talk to Josh and the rest of the jocks.
Zacky was a popular guy in school, he was drop-dead gorgeous all the girls were over him, and the guys wanted to be near him so the girls might go out with them.
I mean yeah i liked Zacky alot but i always wondered why he hung out with me. But i never asked i just enjoied it. But everytime lauren was near he would leave or not talk, something is going on between them, i know it.

"uhm. okay bye babe" i waved and the jocks laughed at me so i flipped them off.

'im going to the dance with zacky' kept on singing in my head.

"i should tell lauryn" i said as i got to my locker i took out my purse and grabbed my phone and headed to the bathroom.

the phone call between jade and lauryn

"Hello?" lauryn picked up the phone on the 5th ring

"finally! hey guess what!!" i said to her.

"well sorry, im in school retard. and what?" she asked

"ZACKY ASKED ME TO GO TO THE DANCE WITH HIM!!" i squealed

"oh." lauryn said

"just 'oh'? no 'awesome for you jade! hope you have fun!'? whats with that? i thought you would be happy for me!!" i said to her

"no its just a 'oh' because i know something bad is going to happen tonight and your going to get hurt, i just have this feeling. i dont think you should go jade." she said

"your just jelous that i have a guy and you dont!" i yelled at her.

"no jade. im going out with bert remember? and why would i be jelous of you and that fucking slut?" she snapped

"bert is a homo and your jelous because you cant stand to see me happy god damn it!!" i screamed and hung up the phone.

"god! why cant she just be happy for me!?" i yelled as i got out of the bathroom and in to a empty hall.

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at the dance
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"okay want to dance?" Zacky asked me

"sure why not?" i shrugged and went over to the dance floor.

"okay, lets go to the middle" he dragged me over to the middle of the dance floor and waved over to the DJ
A fast dance cut off the slow song that was playing so he would touch me.

"god im not that ugly am i?" i thought as i jumped around and danced.

" 5!4!3!2-1!!!!" Zacky screamed and i felt something cover my head, then my sholders,then the rest of my body. It was water.
He planned to ruin my fucking weekend and humiliate me infornt of everyone to get a few laughs in, i thought i loved him, he was always there for me.

"HAHA! LOOK A WET EMO!" Zacky yelled in histerics

I started to cry. there was one on arounf to stick up for me, no one who was there wanted me there.

"YEAH! FUCKING CRY EMO! GO HOME AND CUT YOUR WRISTES!" Josh yelled at me

So i just ran out the door and ran though the dark night, i didnt know where i was going but i just ran in my dance dress[[a//n it was a black dress with white hems]], soaking wet and crying.

As i ran i thought to myself
'how can i be so stupid, how!? i thought he liked me, i thought he loved me like he said he did. i was just being used for his joke. im a fucking joke to everyone.' i kept on repeating in my head.

I ran to starbucks because it started to down poor and i didnt want to die of a fucking cold. even though death looks good right now.

As i ran in i bumped into some one

"fucking hell! watch were your going!" he screamed.

"sorry" i whimpered and broke down crying.

"oh shit. im sorry ahh! dont cry! please.. uhm.. ah. here let me get you something. what do you want coffee hot cococ? water?" he asked me as he guided me to the table.

"im fine" i cried.

"no your not. are you okay did some one hurt you? did some one do this to you?" he asked me
When he asked me i just replayed what happened over and over again in my head causeing me to cry harder.

"oh crap.. stay here okay? stay." he said as he went to get napkins and he bought a coffee and a hot coco for me.

"thanks" i whispered and looked down at my now ruined dress.
"well this is ruined. and i love this dress too" i sighed and cleared my face.

"well.. that sucks. why were you crying?" the guy asked me

"well the guy that said he 'loved me' totally hurt me like 15 minutes ago." i said looking down at the ground.

"like hurt you hurt you? or break up, im never going to have a boyfriend again omg, hurt me?" he asked.

"pfft. you can say both and i dont act like that" i laughed alittle looking up at him.

"yeah, i know but i made you laugh" he smiled at me
"you gonna tell me what went down?" he asked me

"sure. im never going to see you again." i shrugged " he asked me to a school dance and i said sure why not. and we went and about 5 seconds into the dance he asked me if i wanted to dance, hence the name 'school dance' " i sighed

"and?" he said wanting me to continue.

"and, after about a minute of danceing he did some werid motion and a few seconds later there was water all over me and everyone laughing at a 'wet emo' and i just ran away. i mean he said 'i love you' and i thought he meant it. i like him ALOT and he just used me for a joke. how can some one do that?" i cried

"oh babe" he said and hugged me

"i just.. i just wanted some one to like me.. i wanted some one to need me .. i just wanted something good to finally happen to me and when it does it gets fucked up because im just so much fun to fuck around with and my feelings, lauryn was right. she was and then i blew up at her for trying to protect me" i cried into his chest.
Wow think about desperat[sp?] i dont even know this guy and he became my human teddy bear.

"im sorry i dont even know you and im useing you as my human teddy bear" i cleared my face

"well im Adam Lazara and now you know me and i love being you human teddy bear, i just completed my dream thanks to you" he smiled and me.
"thank you" i smiled back and gave him one last hug before getting up.
"where are you going now princess?" he asked me.
"'princess'? " i asked laughing
"yeah..your kinds dressed like one, can i call you that?" he asked me
"yeah..sure"i smiled "im going to my friend, well i hope my friend still, house to make up with her." i sighed
"oh..well do you need a ride? my mom could drive you" he smiled
"how old are you?" i asked
"only 15, i have another 2 years till i drive. yesh i know its sad that i still get rides from my mom" he sighed laughing.
"no, your lucky you mom cares for you. and if she wouldnt mind i would really like that" i smiled at him
"so how old are you princess?" he asked me
"ahh only 13 and a life thats way beyond me" i said as we walked out of StarBuck's
"really? you look my age" he shrugged.
"yeahh.. im so pretty like that" i fliped my hair acting like a prep.
"pfft. you wish" he smiled
"uh! you know its true!! you just might be.....a....blind werido...who eats........pillows" i thought of anything.
"yeah im a blind werido who eat pillows" he laughed at me
"fine you think or one right now" i said back to him as we walked to his moms car
"heyy mom can we give princess a ride home?" he asked
"yeah sure hon" she said and adam opened the door for me. i told her where lauryns house was and we were off.
"thank you mister adam" i smiled at him
"your welcome my lady" he smiled back
"okay.. make one up" i said
"fine..your...a..girl..with..a.pretty smile.......and a wicked dress......and .............a...fucker for a boyfriend" he nailed it.
"aww." i blushed
"hey.. you never told me your name princess" he pointed out to me.
"oh right, its Jade Philps" i smiled
"jade hu? i like it.. it suits you" he said
"and adam suits you" i smiled back
"yeah..i know" he said.
I yawned alittle when we were a block away from lauryns house
"you tired?" he asked me
"would you be?" i asked him
"point taken" he said and leaded his head on my sholder."we should hang out some time princess, that would be awesome." he said
I leaned my head on his head and said "dude that would be. let me give you my number" i said and grabbed a piece of paper and a pen from my purse.
"here ya go" i smiled as i gave it to him
"heres mine" he gave me his.
"269-4980 ADAM " i read
"haha yeah." he smiled at me as we pulled up to the house.
"thank you Mrs.Lazara" i smiled at her
"no problem dear, it dangerous out at night here they told me." she said in the review mirror.
"well later babe" i gave adam a kiss on the cheeck and a big hug.
"thank you for everything" i whispered in his ear.
"need ANYTHING call me" he whispered back to me.
"okay i will" i smiled
"promise?" he said
"promise" i said and got out i waved back to them and went over to lauryns front door.
'well. this is it' i said i knocked on the door and lauryn answered it
"why are you here?" she asked, not in a snoty way but more shocked, i was suppose to be at the dance.
"you were right." i said tears waving with my voice."go ahead, say 'i told you so' come one" i said.
"no. i wouldnt do that." she pulled me into a hug and brought me to her room.
"are you going to tell me what happened?" she asked me.
"okay" i told her everything, from when i got picked up from where i got dropped off my adam.
"well. 1) we are going to kill Zacky and 2) i think you like some one." she teased.
"no.. its to early for that." i sighed and rested my body on her bed.
"i understand" she said and laied back with me.
"why are some guys such...UH!!" i said
"pft. tell me about it. i broke it off with bert though" she said.
"why? he likes you" i said.
"yeah... but its BERT. ew! i mean was i drugged or something? seriously?" she laughed.
"yea.sorry about that." i laughed too.
'poor bert.' i sighed. I yawned for like the millionth time tonight.
"bed.now." lauryn yawned to.i looked over at the clock, we have been talking for 5 hours. wow. time does fly.
"night lauryn." i said
"night jade" and we went to sleep.
The whole dance thing kept on repeating in my head.

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4 months later
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still the flash back
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for the last 4 months school was like home, unliveable. Zacky became a fucking prep and fucking destroied me, and everything else just didnt go all that well. My 13 birthday still scares me to death as the memories flash on and off in my head.
I called Adam but he said he was on vacation and couldnt stay so we only talked on the phone.
We never got to hang out. and i miss him, i want my human teddy bear back.
after a few months we lost contact and life still went down hill.
My parents killed them selfs and Zacky did things i cant even say.
I was his, as he put it 'emo slave', and had to do everything he said or he'd kill me. what funn right?
me and lauryn are like tumors to each other, except for school, she goes to a private one. Every thing is just not right, i dont want my life anymore. its just to much to handle, and after a few more weeks mr.way found me in the park on the virge of death. Life has just been oddles of fun for me!
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prestent and mikey's p.o.v
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"no i dont think you belond here. jade told me who you were, and i think you should go. NOW" i snapped at him.
"well lauryn told me who you were when i was asking for jade, and if you move i think i want to see my fucking bitch" he snapped back.
"HEY! DONT YOU FUCKING CALL JADE THAT!" frank yelled at him
"i think i should call her what she is" he said.
"thats it" gerard came over and pushed him out the door and gave him a few thing to member.
"if you come back, im sure to kill ya. so leave" gerard yelled and sat back down with jenna on his lap.
"tell jade i came by. she would love it" Zacky yelled and ran off
"so.. who was it that i just beat up?" gerard asked sipping his coffee.
"Zacky." lauryn and i said.
"who?" bob asked looking confused.
"Zacky, jade first boyfriend that ..."lauryn looked down.
"that destroied her life" i sighed "he made it hell for her and made her suicidal" i finished for lauryn
"lets kill him. can we do that?" frank asked.
"if he comed by, i dont see why not." ray said.
I looked over at jade, '3 more months untill i have you back' i kept on saying in my head.
"mikey?" gerard poked my sholder.
"3 more months" i sighed and laied back down with jade.
"3 more months and you better wake up" i said and dozed off.

[[10 more comments and i'll update, muahha i have an evil idea for jade! aha]]