I'm Convinced We Don't Make Sense

“Carolina? Carolina..." I hear. My eyes open and I feel someone softly nudge me. As my eyes focus, I notice that I’m laying down next to Tony, we’re face to face.

“T-Tony?” I ask, confused. I sit up and look around. The cold breeze sends shivers through me as I realize we’re at the beach. I snap my head to him. “Why are we- what’s-“

He props himself up on his elbows and chuckles. “Guess we just fell asleep here..”

We fell asleep? On… the beach?
He stares at me for some time, until it finally clicks. Memories from last night fill my mind and I now know why we’re at the beach.

“We did!” I say laughing. He laughs along with me and sits up.

“Yep.. I tried to get you up.. But you offered to stay. Then, you just fell asleep. Don’t worry, I kept you warm.”

I giggle as I notice his jacket on me, then feel guilty because he doesn’t have one. “I’m sorry, I already have one of your jackets, here-," I say taking it off.

“No, no! It’s a chilly morning, keep it on," he says, grabbing my hands. He holds them in his and I smile.

“Thank you.”

He grins at me. “Let’s go eat. Then..”

“You could come over to my place?”

He nods. “Sounds good.”

He helps me and I stick myself to him as he wraps his arms around me. I’m trying to ignore the fact that I have a headache which is pounding against my head, so I’m focusing on our synchronizing feet as we walk to my car.

“It was an amazing night," I hear him say. He looks down and smiles.

“It was..”, I whisper and kiss his cheek. He turns to me and smiles, then pecks my lips, then I lay my head on his arm as we walk hand in hand to my car.

“This place is delicious. One of the best places I’ve ever eaten breakfast at too! Back in the small town I lived in, I’d always come here on short notice. It’s high class shit," I say as we walk into the fast food place.

He laughs as he swings our hands. “McDonalds?”

We stop in front of the cash register. “Yup!” I say with a smile.

He nods and laughs. “You’re hilarious.”

As I finish up my pancakes, Tony sips on his orange juice and stares at me eating. I look up from my pancakes and stare back at him. “You’re making me self-conscious," I mumble.

He chuckles and holds one of my free hands in his. “You shouldn’t feel self-conscious. You look lovely while eating pancakes.”

I laugh and finish up my last bite. “All done! And I don’t feel like vomiting!”

He lifts his hand in the air and yells out a loud, “Woo!” The people around us turn to stare.

I laugh and stand up. “Well, I better not speak too soon.”

He stands up along with me and holds my hand. “Let’s get you back home so you could sleep on an actual bed.”

“Only if you come with me," I say clinging to him. In my head, that sounded okay to say but once I actually said, it sounded pretty awful. Luckily, he laughs along with me.

“Of course," he says with a reassuring smile.

The drive back home was complete bliss. He turned on the radio and we sung along to a cheesy pop song as he held my hand with one of his free hands while driving.

We finally get to my home and we immediately go to my bedroom. I notice that Mairsa isn’t here, then remember that I was her ride back home. I give her a quick call before getting comfortable with Tony, but it goes to voicemail.

“She’s most likely at my place," I hear Tony say from my bed. I nod and set my phone down on my drawer, then make my way to him. He pulls the warm covers over us and I snuggle close to his chest. I feel as his lips press against my head multiple times. I can’t help but feel safe and right in his arms, as if this is where I should be. After a month of not seeing him, it feels so good to finally have him in my arms once again.
Then, I remember...

“You’re leaving today..." I croak out.
I look up at him, he stares back, frowning, but then nods once. My heart drops and I try to keep a smile. I don’t want to act clingy, or too attached.
I nod and peck his lips one last time before burrowing my face into his chest and closing my eyes.

“Right now- we cuddle," I hear him say. I can’t help but laugh.

“Agreed.”
It’s going to be a hard fall when he leaves. This is what I was scared of.

Marisa’s POV:
I walked out of Jaime’s room with his shirt on. What a night. I had no idea what it meant for Jaime, but what I did know was that I was happy.

After brushing my teeth I went downstairs to the kitchen. I expected Tony and Mike to be in there, but it was only Vic.

“Hey Vic,” I said with a smile on my face. He only nodded in my direction. I sighed. “How was your night?”

“It was dull compared to yours,” he smirked. I walked over to the fridge to grab a water bottle.

“Excited to tour?” I asked, going over to take a seat next to him.

“Yeah,” he nodded.

“Okay, look. We need to be civil now. Yeah we’re sort of exes and you don’t want to be with me, bleh!” I said, trying to be nonchalant about the last part.

“Marisa, I do want to b-” Vic started but I was too focused on getting my point across.

“But honestly it’s time to not be weird with each other. For the sake of tour and our friends. I’m sorry for being a dick to you that day at my work. Now it’s time for us to just go have fun and not be awkward,” I smiled. I needed the awkwardness to be done with.

“Alright. I’m sorry too,” he said. I didn’t believe his apology, but I took it. I could not wait till he actually apologized to me and meant every word. “We’ll have fun on tour!” he said with a wide smile.

“We will,” I nodded. Before anyone could say anything else I felt arms around me. I turned slightly and my eyes locked with Jaime’s.

“Morning sunshine,” he said in my ear. “Hey Vic,” he said, looking at him.

“Hey,” Vic said with a small smile.

“Come back to bed for awhile,” Jaime looked back at me. “I’ll take you home later.”

“Alright,” I smiled. “See ya, Vic.”

“Bye,” he mumbled.
I got out of my seat, Jaime intertwined our fingers and leaded me back to his room.

“I’m happy you’re still here,” he said.

“Me too,” I smiled. “I had a nice time last night.”

“I did too,” he said, closing the door behind us. He walked over and wrapped his arms around my waist. “I don’t know what to classify us as and I’m sorry,” he sighed.

“It’s alright,” I shrugged.

“It’s not. But I know you still have feelings for Vic, so it wouldn’t be fair to either of us. Last night was great and I am happy with you.”

“We’ll just have fun,” I said, resting my head on his chest.
I felt as if no one truly wanted to date me. Was there something wrong with me? I think at some point Jaime did want to be with me, but he knew I still did have feelings for Vic. I felt as if I’d never have a real boyfriend because of Vic.

Tony’s POV:
Carolina had her head on my chest as I played with her fingers. We had been up for awhile now after getting sleep. I didn’t want to check the clock. I didn’t want to leave anytime soon. All I wanted to do was stay in bed with Carolina. This was the only time in my life that I didn’t want to go on tour.

“…And this tattoo?” she asked, pointing to the date tattooed on me.

“That’s for my dad. He passed away and I wanted a tattoo to honor him,” I explained.

“That’s really nice of you,” she said. She looked up at me and our eyes locked, a smile started to play on her lips. I put my index finger under her chin and brought our lips together. I slid my tongue across her bottom lip and her arms went around my neck. In a matter of minutes we were making out with me on top of her. Before anything could go farther the door bursted open.

“Hey Carolina! I-Perry! Jesus keep it in your pants,” Marisa shouted, her hand now over her eyes. I laughed, getting off of Carolina and sitting next to her now.

“How was your night?” Carolina asked.

Marisa took her hand off of her face. “My night was unexpected…”

“What do you mean?” Carolina questioned.

“I kind of ended up with Jaime last night…” she trailed off.

“What?” Carolina and I both questioned.

“We had so much fun at the club, then he kissed me, then we danced more, then we slept together last night. I sound terrible. Two out of four of Pierce The Veil I’ve slept with. Fabulous,” she sighed.

“What are you going to do about touring?” I asked.

“I’m going to merch, be friends with Vic, and I assume the same with Jaime,” she nodded triumphantly. I think both Carolina and I both knew how Marisa was feeling right about now. Neither of them had wanted to commit, it always made her feel horrible that Vic didn’t want to commit, but now Jaime also.

“I have to go pack now. I’ll see you guys in awhile,” Marisa said, walking out of the door quickly.

Carolina and I sat on the couch in her living room. Neither of us had even brought up the status of our relationship, or if we even had one.

“Tony,” Carolina spoke up.

“Yes?” I asked.

“How much time do you have left? I mean-before the guys come get you?”

I took my phone out, dreading this moment.

“No more than twenty minutes, I guess,” I sighed.

“Okay,” she nodded, putting her head down. “I had a great time with you today.”

“I had a great time with you too. Anytime we’re together I have a great time,” I said.

“Same here. I’m really going to miss you,” she said.

“I’ll miss you too,” I responded. I immediately pushed our lips together. How was I suppose to live without her for almost three months? There was no way in hell I could get her to come with us.

“Perry!” Marisa shouted. “The guys are here!”
Marisa walked into the living room to stand in front of Carolina. “I’m going to miss you so much, Carolina. It’s going to suck to be without you.”

“I know!” Carolina got up and immediately hugged Marisa. “What am I supposed to do without you? If I die, don’t be surprised.”

“Don’t die. I’ll call and text everyday,” Marisa while hugging her still. When they let go, Marisa shot me a look. “I’m going to go on the bus.”

“Okay. Bye!” Carolina said. Marisa grabbed her bags and scurried out of the house. I could hear her shouting at the guys and they all shouted back.

“I’ll walk you out,” Carolina said. I nodded. She grabbed my hand and laced our fingers. We reached the sidewalk in front of the walkway of the house. I could hear everyone shouting for me on the bus.

“I better go,” I said. She only nodded. I hugged her immediately, we held onto each other tightly. “I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too,” she said barely above a whisper.
We broke apart from our hug, I wanted to kiss her quickly but she let go of me and started talking.

“What does this mean for us?” she asked.

I dreaded this. But I knew I couldn’t start a relationship at the start of a tour. “Carolina, I like you, a lot. But I think we should figure out what we’re going to do about us when we get back. I’m sorry. But I think-“

Carolina cut me off, “No, I understand. Don’t worry. We’ll figure it out another time.” Carolina turned to walk away.

“Carolina.”

“I’ll see you when you get back Tony. Have fun,” she said, jogging into the house.

“Carolina! Carolina!” I shouted before the door slammed shut.

“Hey Tony! Let’s go!” Mike shouted. “We have a tour, remember?”

“I’m coming,” I said only low enough I could hear. I walked over to the bus, taking one look at the house before I shut the door. I sat on the couch and the bus jerked slightly, then proceeded to move. I felt like a jackass. I wanted Carolina, but now she probably doesn’t want me.