Status: Active as can be.
Cannibal
Alone
Time.
It's irrelevant now.
I can feel myself waste away as it goes by, but I'm unaware how long it took to get to the point where I am at now. I don't know how much longer I have until death.
Concrete is all I can stare at now. Sometimes a spider comes along as a companion, greeting closer to my ill fate of death.
All I want is for my short, tragic life to be heard of, especially for the higher class. Maybe they will see my story, see how the lower class sees us, and have a change of heart and mind. It's the only hope I have for anything lately.
Randy hasn't visited. I haven't heard anything from him. Nor anyone else for that matter. It's not like it is a big deal. I have always been lonely (I'm not really counting the spiders as actual companions; they come and go too fast). I'm too strange. There's no way I would fit in anywhere, especially in this world.
The pain I felt is nothing now. It doesn't matter either. I just feel numb now. My bones and muscles were aching from the position I have stuck myself in long ago. I feel like stone now. Maybe now I will be unbreakable. Maybe now I can not be moved. Maybe there is a chance for me to be stable for once.
Is this what the almighty God has destined for me? Who does He think He is anyways? Dictating my life according to whatever plans He has for me and the world. It's idiotic. It's unreasonable. It's ridiculous.
If I was one of God's many precious children, then why does my life end like this? Why am I subjected to this when all I didn't want to do with my life is not eat the meat? Why am I required to eat it? I can live without it. I can live without all this cannibalism and this social structure system and all this filthy prejudice and lies and untrustworthy neighbors. I'm sick of it all.
I'm so glad I'm going to leave it all. I'm going to a place so much better than this. Hell would be better than here. I would rather burn in my grave full of fire for eternity than have to see this world anymore.
It's irrelevant now.
I can feel myself waste away as it goes by, but I'm unaware how long it took to get to the point where I am at now. I don't know how much longer I have until death.
Concrete is all I can stare at now. Sometimes a spider comes along as a companion, greeting closer to my ill fate of death.
All I want is for my short, tragic life to be heard of, especially for the higher class. Maybe they will see my story, see how the lower class sees us, and have a change of heart and mind. It's the only hope I have for anything lately.
Randy hasn't visited. I haven't heard anything from him. Nor anyone else for that matter. It's not like it is a big deal. I have always been lonely (I'm not really counting the spiders as actual companions; they come and go too fast). I'm too strange. There's no way I would fit in anywhere, especially in this world.
The pain I felt is nothing now. It doesn't matter either. I just feel numb now. My bones and muscles were aching from the position I have stuck myself in long ago. I feel like stone now. Maybe now I will be unbreakable. Maybe now I can not be moved. Maybe there is a chance for me to be stable for once.
Is this what the almighty God has destined for me? Who does He think He is anyways? Dictating my life according to whatever plans He has for me and the world. It's idiotic. It's unreasonable. It's ridiculous.
If I was one of God's many precious children, then why does my life end like this? Why am I subjected to this when all I didn't want to do with my life is not eat the meat? Why am I required to eat it? I can live without it. I can live without all this cannibalism and this social structure system and all this filthy prejudice and lies and untrustworthy neighbors. I'm sick of it all.
I'm so glad I'm going to leave it all. I'm going to a place so much better than this. Hell would be better than here. I would rather burn in my grave full of fire for eternity than have to see this world anymore.
♠ ♠ ♠
Sorry I haven't updated in like forever. I just, well, joined the Army for some reason and wasn't able to do anything internet wise (well anything truly productive) for like four months. I still won't be able to be as active as I would like to be, but we'll see how well I do now with my laptop and my still limited personal time until the end of March.I dislike AIT so freaking much.
I can't wait to get to my permanent duty station.