She Will Be Loved

It’s time. James took my back pack and my make up while Liz grabbed all my clothes. They loaded everything into the trunk of the car. I sat on the steps outside the front door to what has been my home for the past month. I thought about it and began to cry inside… I was happy I could live with Lizzy and James but… I was going to miss waking up in my room every morning, watching movies all night with Erik, having waffle mix wars in the kitchen, having those moments with Erik where I feel like he might kiss me, all the memories. Most of all, I’d miss hearing Erik’s voice first thing when I wake up.
“So…” Erik began as he sat down on the steps right next to me. “Did you know this is where I used to sit when I didn’t understand anything, or when everything was wrong. I sat here when I was watching Lena come home from the store. I also sat here and practiced drawing and painting. It’s a very memorable place.”
“Wow. I didn’t know that…” I trailed off in thought. I didn’t want to leave Erik. The day was almost over. They allowed me that so Erik could spend the day with me.
“Something wrong?”
I took a moment to collect myself so my voice wasn’t shaky.
“I don’t want to leave you. You and all the memories.”
Then he kissed my lips, his soft lips holding mine. They were so sweet. It seemed to last an eternity, and I loved it.
“You will never leave me, not really. You’re always with me here, and I’m always with you there. And the memories, you’ll always have them. And this isn’t the last time you’ll be here.” I didn’t know what to say. I wanted to say thank you, but my lips wouldn’t move and my voice wasn’t willing to come through anyway.
I threw my arms around him in a hug and tears of joy streamed down my face. I was so happy, but sad at the same time. Erik simply held me and rubbed my back in comfort.
Things were changing, fast. I didn’t know how to handle it. I always wanted change… I never knew it be this much though. I never knew that change… would make me so happy. I’m glad things are changing. I was ready to accept it with arms wide open. My life has been really complicated, especially in the past month, but the thing is, I don’t care anymore. I am where I am. And I love everything about it. Sometimes the worst of things can get you where you want to be. Sometimes you might have to do something to get where you want, sometimes it’ll happen by what you’re already doing. I learned not to wait around for change, bring the change to you. Go up and get it or you won’t get it at all…
That will be my attitude when I think of it. I’ll try to change not just my life, but my attitude towards it. Allison was a bitch, my dad did leave yeah. I was raped and beat and scared out of my mind. But hey, I’m where I am because of it. I love it. OH! I almost forgot.
“Erik. I have something for you actually.” I walked over to the trunk of the car and opened my backpack. I grabbed a little rectangle shaped object covered in silver wrapping paper and a red bow was drawn on the top of it. I walked back over to him and handed him the present. “Here. For everything you’ve done for me.” I smiled a faint little smile.
“You didn’t have to…” I just motioned to the present. He unwrapped the silver stuff and I saw his eyes grow wide. “H-how. I couldn’t find these anywhere!”
“I got the watercolor pencils at a store back in Torance. I got the blending brush there too.”
“But this is like the best brand you could get! How could you afford this?”
“I saved up a ton of emergency money before I ran away. I didn’t use a lot of what I had saved. So I used the rest of it to get them for you.”
“What? But that’s your money.”
“You did so much for me. This is how I repay you. It’s my thank you.” He jumped up and hugged me.
“Thank you. Thank you so much Jos.” I was smiling and he was smiling.
“It’s nothing.”
“But it means everything to me.” This time I kissed him.
“And you mean everything to me.”
“You ready Joslin?” James called from the car. I pecked Erik on the cheek and ran to the car leaving him on the steps. But like he said, I wasn’t really leaving. I opened the door to the car and jumped into the back seat. I watched Erik and the house as we drove away. When I couldn’t see them anymore I grabbed my iPod. 7:56PM. I played my music and I haven’t listened to it since I ran away. Surprising for me. I went on now playing and it wasn’t Linkin Park anymore… It wasn’t numb. It was Maroon 5-She Will Be Loved. I listened to it and realized how true it was. She WILL be loved.