For You I'd Bleed Myself Dry

Harry’s POV

I’ve been gone for twelve days already. It feels like months most days but I call Quinn whenever I can. It’s becoming harder to talk as much as we used to. She sleeps most of the day and her treatments are longer. I can tell she’s getting worse, I can hear it in her voice. It kills me to hear her so weak and helpless. Her voice is shaky and her breaths get heavier the longer we talk. I try to do most of the talking so she can just listen. Quinn doesn’t like to keep me up to date with her diagnosis because she thinks she’ll ruin tour. No matter how many times I tell her, she always sugar coats how she’s feeling. Cheri promised me that she’d call me weekly or whenever something drastic happens.

Tour is amazing. Having the privilege to see all these amazing places and all the fans is such a great feeling, but I’m so distracted by Quinn. The guys can tell but most of the time we just avoid talking about it, they know how hard it is for me. Interviews are the worst by far. My thoughts always wander in the middle of a question. When they ask if who’s single I always have to lie and raise my hand or joke about how me and Niall are in a relationship and hope they’ll let it go. Quinn said, “It’d just be better you know, incase I don’t make it. Not mention management would have a field day.” I didn’t want to upset her so I just let it go and plus I couldn’t handle it if people started sending her hate.

11:30. I laid back on my bunk and pulled out my phone. I dialed Quinn’s number as I turned on my side facing my wall of pictures. It was full of pictures of friends from back home, the guys, family, and Quinn’s own section.

“I was just thinking about you,” she whispered into the receiver.

“Hi love,” I quickly replied. The sound of her voice sent shivers through my body.

“What state are we in today Superstar?” her voice was more animated then usual.

“To be honest, I can’t quiet remember.” I chuckled lightly. “How are you today?” I asked.

“Well I just met with the doctors. They tested my white blood cells…” her voice got weak. “They aren’t going down.”

My heart sunk. I stuttered to find words, but nothing seemed like the right thing to say.

“I really didn’t want to tell you just yet with you being out on tour and everything but I mean it might not be that bad. I just have to find a match for a bone marrow transplant…”

I cut her off, “could I be a match?”

“Harry…” she was stalling.

“I’m serious Quinn. Is it possible?” I didn’t even second guess it. If I was a match I was going to donate, regardless of the procedure.

“I mean yeah I guess it’s possible but it’s painful Harry. I’m not letting you do that.”

“I really don’t care Quinn. If I can, I’m doing it.” My voice got stern.

“They’re already looking for donors. My parents are getting tested, even close family members. I just can’t let you do that and not feel bad about it. You’re constantly moving anyway, you won’t have time for the surgery or recovery time,” Quinn said.

I paused for a bit. I wasn’t one for surgery, I hated it actually, but if it meant saving Quinn I wouldn’t hesitate.

“HARRY! Come on mate we’ve got sound check,” Louis yelled while pulling back the curtain to my bunk.

“Just give me a sec!” I yelled.

“I-I’m sorry,” I said softly into my iphone.

“You have nothing to be sorry about. Call me before your show?” I could tell she was crying.

“Of course. I love you so much Quinn. And I miss you,” I said encouragingly.

“I love you and miss you more,” her voice was tender. “Oh and you owe me a song,” she let out a light laugh.

“You got it babe.” I hung up the phone and ran my fingers through my hair and let out a frustrating groan. I jumped out of my bunk and shuffled to the front of the bus.

“Took you long enough Harry,” Niall mumbled while biting into an apple.

If looks could kill, Niall would be gone. I didn’t mean to take it out on the guys but it happened. Liam could tell I was upset and followed my outside of the bus.

“Oi, wait up. What’s wrong with you?” He asked.

“Quinn needs a bone marrow transplant. She doesn’t want me to get tested but I have to do something Liam. I’ve got to help her,” I avoided eye contact. Liam didn’t say anything. He just sat there with me while I buried my face in my hands.

Quinn’s POV

Immediately after hanging up with Harry I felt sick. Guilt filled every inch of my body. I needed something to fix this, I didn’t know what but I was going to figure something out.

I skipped my nap and didn’t touch my food while trying to come up with a plan. Harry was the only thing that was going to be on my mind until I could find a way to make this all better. Well that was the plan. A knock came from my door; I jerked my head up when I was greeted by Nurse Molly. Molly was the head nurse in the children’s ward. I hadn’t seen her in quite some time, with getting so sick and everything lately. She was heavier set then Cheri but not over weight. She had natural ginger hair that she always wrapped up in a tight bun on the top of her head.

I gave her a fake smile, “Molly, Hi.”

“Hello dear. I’ve heard how everything’s been going lately, I’m truly sorry.” She didn’t bother giving me a fake smile. “I wish I wasn’t seeing you under these circumstances, but Hailey, she got worse too. She didn’t make it.”

Everything around me stopped. I stared at the same spot on the wall for what seemed to be hours. It was the same spot I had thrown my jell-o at when they told me I’d loose my hair. The red food coloring had permanently stained the wall. I looked everywhere for something to throw but I couldn’t find anything. I didn’t have time to cry yet; instead I reached down at my pick line and pulled out the IVs. I tore off all the wires and anything I was attached to. I got off my bed and started walking, my steps got heavier as I felt the nurses grab my shoulders. I quickly shrugged them off and began running, I ran to the end of the hall to the flight of stairs. I started conquering the steps one at a time until I couldn’t control my feet. I started skipping one step, then two and three, when I made it to four I felt my feet struggle and my knees give out. I felt top heavy and my body began tumbling down the stairs, crashing my forehead into the wall.