Never Alone

John watched her from a far as the girl sat on the ground in front of the grave where her boyfriend was now buried. He himself couldn't believe already half a year had passed since his loud, full of life friend was alive. He found himself a bit choked up from the thought which is why he stayed a bit back giving the girl a moment alone. He could only imagine what she felt. Everyone had always thought her and Eric would be together forever. Funny how you never include what could happen when you think of something like that.

Jenna wiped her eyes as she stared at the stone in front of her. Time did make things a bit easier, but she still missed him more than she imagined possible.

"Jen..." Garrett said to his sister. He was closer to her than John was and if anyone should speak it was him.

"I'm fine." The girl whispered as she wiped her eyes.

John rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably wishing he could make it all better. Wishing he could just bring the boy back for everyone. Their group still felt weird without him.

"Ok, I'm going to go start the car." Garrett whispered shoving his hands into his coat pockets. John had went numb minutes ago so he didn't mind anymore.

The girl nodded and Garrett took off giving John a sad look as he passed.

John then took the moment to step beside her and she didn't bother to look up. She could feel his presense.

"I feel bad you know..." She said and he didn't bother to respond, he knew she would continue.

"Like, I feel bad for going on living and then I feel bad for being sad some days because if he was here instead of me I would want him to move on." She whispered.

"He would want you to be happy, Jenna. You know him, he was happy 99% of the time."

Jenna chuckled, "Yeah, he was."

"He also would want you to be happy because he loved you."

"I know, but some days I just want him back so badly it hurts too much to even do anything." She said wiping the fallen tears.

John gulped back his own tears and sat beside the girl, bringing a hand to her back. Hell he had been drunk himself for several months after his death. He didn't deal with things well. So he did what he did best; drink.

"I just miss him so much. It's not fair. He should be here with us. He should be here with me. Maybe it's selfish I don't know. I just know I'd do anything to have him back."

"I know. I would too." He whispered. John was certain he would. He missed his best friend. He missed not having the crazy kid around. His drinking partner, his voice of reason. He hated it.

"I'll never be happy again. I can't imagine ever being with someone else."

"Oh, don't say that. Honestly, he would be so mad at you if you did that."

"I know." She mumbled leaning against John.

"Maybe you won't ever love someone as much as him, but that doesn't mean you won't love again. That's not saying you could ever replace him. You'll never forget him, Jen, but don't be miserable. Live for him."

She wrapped her arms around the boy and cried into his shirt. He didn't mind. He welcomed it simply because he wanted her to feel better.

"I just want him back." She said into his shirt through her tears.

"I know sweetie. I know. I'm so sorry I can't bring him back. If I could I would."

"I know."

He kissed her head and rocked her gently in his arms for several moments.

"Come on, let's go before you get pnhemonia."

She nodded and he pulled her from the ground, holding her hand in silence as he pulled her to Garrett's car. He opened the door for her and she crawled into the back seat still a bit numb from her crying. John sighed and got in the front seat feeling horrible for no reason besides that he couldn't help her.

Jenna stared out the window her mind filling with Eric like it usually did when she was alone.

"Gotcha!" He yelled as he wrapped his arms around her causing her to squeal and him to laugh as he pulled her to the floor. She began giggling as he tickled her in the floor of his bedroom and a smile lined the boy's face as he stared down at her. He finally stopped, leaving her breathing heavily as he straddled her hips. He brushed back her hair gently staring into her eyes that still caused his stomach to do flips.

"Hey Jenna..." He whispered with a grin as he inched his face closer to hers. Her stomach instantly getting butterflies although she had kissed him more than she could count.

"I love you."

"Yeah?" She managed to ask and he nodded, "Yeah. I do."

"I love you too." She responded without hesitation.

He kissed her softly and pulled her closer, "You just made me the happiest, soon to be rockstar ever."

A grin hit her lips from the memory even though her heart now ached more for him. Although spending 5 years with someone probably made that hurt understandable.

"Come out with us tonight Jen. Please." Garrett said as they walked in their house accompanied with John.

"I don't know..."

He sighed in frustration. He wanted to help her but he didn't know how. That's why he go so frustrated. Ever since Eric passed the two had argued more than ever before and he hated it.

"I'll stay with you." John offered. He wanted to just be there for her. He would want someone to be there for him on such a day.

"You don't have to." She said falling onto the couch and he followed suite.

"I don't mind. I want to."

A weak grin hit her lips, "Thanks."

He nodded and placed his arm on the back of the couch. Garrett gave his friend a look before shaking his head as he headed upstairs. He just didn't get it. If he would have suggested doing that he would have been yelled at for hours.

John looked over at the sad girl beside him. He had known her for as long as he had known Eric. In fact, he met the boy because of her. He felt like he owed it to Eric to be there for her.

"Come here Jenna." He whispered pulling her into his lap. She relaxed against his chest and he wrapped his arms around her securely.

"Everything will be ok, sweetie. Everything will work out." He whispered into her hair.

"What if it never gets better?"

"It will. I'll make sure of it."

She clung to the boy and he kissed her head. He would make her better. He was unsure how, but he would definitely try. If not just for herself, for her family, friends, and most importantly for Eric.