Stay With Me

Jordan woke up the next morning in a sort of sleep hangover. He had slept for more than ten hours, but he still felt exhausted. He woke up to a dark day and an empty bed. Jordan heaved his tired body out of bed and shuffled through the house towards the kitchen, where he knew Ellie would be.

"Morning," He mumbled, kissing the side of her head as he walked by her and towards the coffee maker.

"Sleep well?" She asked, not lifting her eyes off of the mixing bowl she had glued to her hands.

"I did, but I feel like I've been hit by a truck," Jordan muttered, grabbing a blue coffee mug out of the cupboard and poured himself some coffee.

"Why?" Ellie laughed softly, putting down the mixing bowl and looking up at him.

"I have no idea," Jordan replied, leaning his back against the counter. "I just feel so tired."

"Why don't you go back to sleep for a little while?" Ellie suggested, touching his hip. "We should go and visit your parents at some point today, but I think you could use a bit more sleep."

Jordan wasn't in the mood to fight her on it. He knew he needed the sleep, especially if he was going to see his parents. He would have to tell them about the tentative deal with Carolina and he wasn't sure how it would go. He knew his mother would be happy that he, Eric and Jared would be together, but at the same time he wasn't sure how they'd feel about him leaving Pittsburgh. He wasn't even sure how he felt about leaving Pittsburgh.

Jordan nodded, giving her forehead a kiss before shuffling back to their bedroom. He climbed back into bed and waited to fall to sleep.

...

"Shit," Ellie mumbled a few hours later as she sat in the bathroom. She flushed the toilet and stood up. She washed her hands and opened the door revealing a more relaxed looking Jordan.

"You okay in here?" He asked, leaning against the doorframe.

"I'm all right," She nodded. "How are you?"

"I'm better," Jordan replied. "I needed the extra sleep."

Ellie nodded and tried to move passed him.

"Ellie, are you all right?" Jordan asked, gently grabbing hold of her arm. "Everything okay?"

"Uh, no," Ellie replied, picking at her fingernails and avoiding his eyes. "Well, maybe. I don't know. I guess it depends on your view."

"What are you talking about?" Jordan asked, letting go of her arm and reaching for her hand. He pulled her out of the bathroom and towards the living room. He sat down and then pulled her onto his lap.

"Ellie, I'd really like it if you talked to me about what's happening," Jordan stated softly. He learned a long time ago that he couldn't just demand that she tell him what was wrong, he had to ease into it. He could be abrupt and crass, because she would shut down and lock him out.

"Well, my period is late," She replied. "And you know that I'm never late. I took a pregnancy test and it said that it was positive. Now I'm not completely sure that I'm pregnant because those things could be wrong, but I have reason to believe that the test could be right."

Jordan felt as if his eyes were about to fall out of his head. Pregnant? Ellie was pregnant?

Jordan felt all of his teenage fears come back to him. Getting a girl pregnant was something that had always terrified him. It was so much as the having a baby part, it was the father part. He loved kids. He loved his nephew and he knew that he could be good with kids, it was being someone's father that scared him. Would he be like his father, and be a rock for the family? Or would he flake out and be a horrible father?

What if the kid didn't like him? What if it was a little girl and she grew up to resent her father and wouldn't let him walk her down the aisle? What if it was a boy and instead of turning out like Eric, it turned out like him? Jordan wasn't an awful person, but he also knew he wasn't a saint either.

Jordan wondered if this was the kind of life he wanted now. Not being married to Ellie and having a baby with her, but he wondered if hockey was still the way to go. He loved the sport and it was in his blood, no doubt, but he was away a lot. Eric had always told him that it was difficult, but Eric was a fighter and he always put forth more effort than he needed to. Jordan was a little different. He did what he could and hoped whatever higher power- be it God, karma or whatever- would do the rest. Now everything was blurry. Could his life really be as simple as Eric made his to be? A career that required him to travel, a wife and a kid? Maybe even several?

"Jordan?" Came Ellie's voice, soft and scared. It pulled him from his trance and brought him back to reality. "Will you say something, please?"

"If you're pregnant, then that's fantastic. If you aren't, then we'll just be a little more careful and try for a baby when we're ready," Jordan replied with a smile. He was hoping that he said the right thing. He didn't want to upset her.

"If I am pregnant, is this something that you would want?" Ellie asked. She was terrified that Jordan would claim to not be ready for this and leave her. It was pretty unlikely, but still plausible.

"I've always wanted kids," Jordan nodded. "But I just always thought that it'd be later in life. If this is the time to have them, then I think that this pregnancy happened for a reason. I don't want to get too excited or anything until we know for sure."

"I was going to make a doctor's appointment for when you left, so I'd know for sure," Ellie admitted, hoping it wouldn't upset him too much.

"I can understand that," Jordan nodded, he was a little upset, but he could understand why she didn't want to tell him right away.

"I was hoping to talk to your mom, since mine is in Pittsburgh," Ellie stated softly. "She's have four kids worth of experience, and I'd just like to talk to her about what I should even do. I'm so lost."

"Yeah, same." Jordan laughed. "I'll have to call Eric one of these days, once we find out for sure."

"Jordan, we might be having a baby." Ellie smiled, holding onto his face.

"God, help this poor child who is going to have us as parents," Jordan laughed before kissing her mouth.