Stay With Me

"How do you feel about next December?" Ellie asked a few days later as Jordan walked out of the shower, a towel around his waist.

"For the wedding?" Jordan verified, running a hand through his wet hair.

"Yeah," Ellie nodded. "It'd be right around Christmas so everyone could be here. You said you wanted to do it here in Pittsburgh, and not in Thunder Bay."

"That sounds good," Jordan nodded, pulling on pants. "Where did you want to do it?"

"I was thinking The Renaissance," She smiled. "It's beautiful there. The lights, the architecture. Would you like it there?"

"I will get married anywhere you want," Jordan smiled, crawling onto their bed beside her.

Things had been going smoothly for the last few days. Jordan and Ellie hadn't been fighting and Ellie had even started planning their wedding. Jordan was trying to be helpful with planning the wedding, he didn't want her to get stressed out.

"So what time is practice?" Ellie asked.

"From 2 until 4," Jordan replied. "Then some training for a bit. What are you doing today?"

"Dress shopping with my sisters," Ellie smiled. Angela and Georgia had taken the day off of work to help Ellie with some wedding stuff. Her dress, flowers, maybe even some catering. Ellie's mother had offered to make the cake as part of their gift.

"I gotta go, baby." Jordan smiled. "I'll text you when I'm out. Have fun today."

"You, too. I love you," Ellie smiled, giving him a kiss.

"I love you, too." Jordan replied before leaving their bedroom, grabbing his hockey bag along the way.

Ellie sighed and closed her laptop before getting up and going for a shower. She had her shower and did her hair and makeup. She was nervous about going dress shopping. She was scared she wouldn't find anything that looked good on her, or anything that she wanted. This was, hopefully, the only wedding she'd ever have. She wanted it to be perfect.

Within 20 minutes Georgia and Angela picked Ellie up in Georgia's car. The drive to the bridal shop was filled with excited chatter and dress ideas, all between Angela and Georgia. Ellie just felt sick. The feeling didn't stop when they entered the shop and dresses were thrust in Ellie's arms and she was pushed into a fitting room.

"You're okay, you're okay." Ellie repeated to herself over and over again as she waited for the consultant to walk in.

"Miss. Forester?" Came an unfamiliar voice.

"Come on in," Ellie replied, staring at herself in the mirror. She watched as the middle-aged woman walked into the room with a smile on her face.

"Hi, I'm Alice Walker." She smiled, shaking Ellie's hand.

"Ellie Forester," Ellie smiled softly.

"Soon-to-be-Staal?" Alice smiled.

"Yes, I am!" Ellie smiled, for a brief moment she didn't feel as sick. She felt at ease with the fact that she was marrying Jordan.

"So any dress ideas for yourself before we try on your sisters' picks?"

"No," Ellie replied, that sick feeling returning. "I'm coming in with an open mind."

"Good," Alice smiled. "Okay, let's try on some dresses. Just breathe, honey. It'll be fine."

Alice gave Ellie a moment alone while she put on a dress. Ellie looked at herself in the mirror and for a moment felt euphoric. The ivory compared to her hair, the way it complimented her skin and brought out her eye colour. Then it hit her. A feeling of nausea so intense it knocked her to her knees.

"Sweetie, you okay in there?" Angela asked, knocking on the door lightly.

"Angie?" Ellie asked weakly.

"Ells, I'm coming in." Angela stated, opening the door. She gasped when she saw her little sister hunched over on the floor. "Sweetie, what happened?"

"I can't breathe," Ellie stated, gasping for air. "Angie, I can't breathe."

"You're covered in sweat," Angela stated, helping Ellie up. "I need you to try and breathe while I get this dress off of you. You're having a panic attack."

"Georgia! Get me a bottle of water!" Angela yelled, steadying Ellie.

Angela moved quickly and calmly as she helped Ellie out of her dress and into a robe, she sat her down and let her breathe. Georgia ran into the room a few seconds later and gasped.

"What happened?" She asked, handing Angela the bottle of water.

"She had a panic attack," Angela stated, handing Ellie the bottle. "I came in here and she was on the floor, covered in sweat and telling me she couldn't breathe."

"Why, Ells?" Georgia asked.

"I don't know," Ellie sighed, pressing a hand to her forehead. "I just panicked when I saw myself in the dress. All of these thoughts and feelings just hit me and I panicked."

"What if I'm not ready for this?" Ellie asked, twisting her engagement ring around her finger.

"To be married to Jordan?" Angela asked.

"I'm fine with being with Jordan, it's the marriage part that scares me. It's just so permanent. What if something goes wrong?" Ellie asked.

"Honey," Georgia laughed softly. "You two have been through hell and back together. I don't think a divorce is in your future."

"When Scarlett got married she went through the exact same thing," Angela stated. "I can't even tell you how many times I found her on the floor in a sobbing heap, and she's the happiest she's ever been. Marriage is scary. It's supposed to be scary, but if you're this freaked out I think you need to talk to Jordan."

"You're right," Ellie nodded, immediately knowing what she had to do.

Ellie got dressed and her sisters took her back home, where Jordan's truck was already in the driveway. She walked up to the front door, unlocked it and fired through the house looking for Jordan.

"Hi, baby." Jordan smiled, but immediately became concerned when he saw the state of her. "What the hell happened today?"

"I can't get married!" Ellie shouted, throwing her hands up in the air.