Dreading Hope

As I opened the door to my baby brother's room, I thought about what it might have been like for my mom when she brought me home from the hospital at the age of 14. I imagined the disappointed look on my grandfather's face, and the excited one on my step grandmother's. My mom got pregnant by some boy in the supply closet at hEr high school. Therefore, I got to grow up without a dad, and a mom that just wanted to be my friend. I mean, sure, she would bring men home from the bar sometimes, but they never meant anything. Until Robert came along 2 years ago. Within a year of them meeting, they got married, and 11 months later, I had a new baby brother, Micheal. This is how I grew up. I basically raised myself from the time I turned 6, and I expect it to be the same with Micheal. But I am going to do whatever I can to help him. Some girls that grow up like I did turn out being strong & independent women. I, on the other hand, make the worst decisions I think possible. I drink and I do drugs. It's not like I have anyone that cares. Robert only cares about my mom, and fucking her. I swear, he would come onto me if he had the chance. The only time I hear from my dad is when the child support is going to be late. So I do what I want, when I want.

"Oohwegagaga." Micheal says to me in his baby talk. I walk to his crib, and pick him up. He's a beautiful blOnde baby with bright blue eyes that he obviously gets from his father.
"Hey baby boy, did you have a good nap?" I coo, and take him into the kitchen, where I see my mom still trying to sleep her hangover off. I set Micheal in his high chair, and get his baby formula to start heating up.
"Morning Lib." I hear from behind me, and I turn to see Robert standing in the doorway of the kitchen.
"It's not morning." I reply, and point at the clock to prove it.
"Oh, well I guess I slept in a little later than I wanted to." He says, and walks to Micheal to give him a kiss on the forehead. "Listen, I was thinking maybe we could all go to the zoo today."
I roll my eyes before replying. "Nope. I'm busy sorry." The microwave beeps, and I open the door to grab Micheal's bottle.
"You can be such a little bitch. I don't know why your mom doesn't kick your ass out. Ungrateful cunt...." He storms out of the kitchen, and I hear him waking my mom up so that he can bitch to her about me. I pick micheal up out of his chair, and carry him back into my room.
"You're the only reason I stay around here sweetie. Sissy loves you." I hold Micheal close, and kiss him on the cheek.