A Step to Love
True Face
Just as I was about to kiss Brody goodnight for what appeared to be the second time, I was pushed and pushed, but then the pushing seemed to change into pokes. And I woke up.
“Ah, hell! It was a good dream!” I yelled not opening my eyes. Maybe if I shut them really tight, I would go back. Maybe…
…if the poking would just stop.
I groaned and threw the pillow that I was trying to cover with aside.
“What’s up?” Alex asked.
I didn’t say anything. And he stared blankly at me.
“What’s up?” he repeated as if I hadn’t heard him.
“’What’s up’? What’s up is that I was having a great dream and you just ruined it for me.” I glared and threw the quilt at him.
“Somebody’s cranky today,” he commented.
"Suck it."
“What are you doing here?"
I shrugged. "Leave me alone," I said as I tried to get back to sleep, but he just poked me again.
"Did you sleep with my brother?"
My head shot at him, and I sat straight, but before I could add something else, Jake came in and I immediately got up and pulled a shirt from his left drawer and gave it to him. "No, we did not sleep together, idiot!" Instead of putting it on right away, Jake stared at it, then at me and wrapped the shirt around his neck while laughing hysterically.
He headed for the bathroom. “Jealous much, Alexander?”
Alex scoffed. “Of?”
Jake poked his head through the door. “That I got some 'Lilly Action'.”
“No, you didn—” I stopped as soon as he winked at me. Jake was doing this to bother his brother. I couldn’t complain. It’d be too horrible if I missed yet another opportunity to mess with Alex after he had messed with my head at the dance.
Alex didn’t respond right away. At first I thought that he didn’t had a nice comeback, but then it felt as if he was choosing his words carefully not to say something he might regret.
“Just worried for Brody. I don’t like him, but I like Lilly less, so I was making sure she was being faithful to him.” He turned his eyes to me. “You are, right? I mean, it’s only your second day in your first official relationship, I can tell.” I thought he said he loathed Brody.
He left the room with me hanging my mouth open. The words were stuck. What a pile of jerk-poo he was. God, how could I think he was gorgeous? He would never stop being his ugly ass self.
“This is not my first official relationship,” I whispered.
But Jake heard. “Did you kiss your last two boyfriends?”
I glared. “How do you know about my previous boyfriends?”
He shrugged. “Brit.”
“Ah.” I shook my head while looking at something other than his eyes. I mean, the dude might think I’m into him, too. Hm. “But that doesn’t mean anything. A relationship is not based on kissing, hugging and other types of affection. More about what you would do for the other person.”
“Well…” he said. “That’s just fifty percent, Lilly.”
“God, I’m such a newbie,” I groaned falling onto the bed.
Jake laughed and came out of the bathroom to sit next to me. “But, Alex does have a point.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Hmm?”
“I know I’m one of your friends and both of us are pretty conscious enough to know that we would never try anything and we respect each other, but just imagine… What if Brody had the same type of relationship we have with his best friend that is a girl. How wou—”
“Jenny,” I interrupted. “He told me that yesterday. That she is his best friend, I mean.”
“Great!” I was confused, but I let him continue. Maybe he would explain himself. “You hate Jenny, right?” I nodded. “Okay, imagine that Brody had the same relationship we have with this Jenny chick. How would you feel if you found out Brody and Jenny had slept together and he was shirtless and she had a very tentative dress on?”
I sighed. “I see your point.”
He petted my head. “Maybe Brody wouldn’t like the idea so much—even if you explained that you just had an emotional breakdown.”
“What if we tell him you’re gay?”
“Lilly…” He raised an eyebrow.
“Sorry.”
~*~*~*~*~
After Jake and I had a warm, nice bath and both of us got breakfast, I headed back to his room. He said he wanted to keep talking to me. This time about something I had said yesterday, but I had said so many things, I could barely remember.
“Yes, Jake?” I opened the door, closed it behind me and pulled one of those bean bags he had in his room or whatever they’re called, but I sat on it.
He was sitting on the bed reading some car magazine, but put it aside when I got in. “Okay, yesterday, you told me Alex had kissed you.”
I rolled my eyes. “I thought this was something different.”
“Well, it is. We were talking about Alex having a point. Now, did that happened before or after Brody asked you to be his girlfriend?”
“Before.”
He let out a relieved breath. “Oh, okay.” I didn’t reply. “Oh, it’s because I don’t want Alex to get into trouble. You know he’s in enough trouble with school and being an idiot and shit.”
I nodded. “Is that it?”
“No.” He looked kind of offended. I smiled. “Now I have to find out why he kissed you.”
“Oh, he said it was because he wanted to somehow 'protect me' from Brody.” I saw he was confused already and I hadn’t even gotten to the other part. “Yeah, he said he loathed him and that he was all bad and stuff. He kissed me because he didn’t want Brody to be my first kiss.”
To my surprise, he started laughing. “And you fell for that shit? Gosh, Lilly, you really are a newbie. That is the lamest excuse I’ve heard in my life! Seriously…”
“I—”
“Lilly, love. Really? If it were sex, would you give it to him?”
I felt my throat tightened. “He looked like he cared and he said it was a favor.”
“Of course you did him a favor. That’s what he wanted because he just wants to hurt you. He wants for you to fall so deeply in love with him and then he will be an asshole to you for the rest of your life.”
“But—”
He sighed. “But what? He told you it didn’t mean anything? That he wouldn’t show any emotions? Babe, that’s his way of getting it and until now, it doesn’t get much old. Actually, I think he’s falling out on the tricks.” He paused to chuckle. “No, actually, I’m a bit mad, because you are just so innocent. Even just a kiss and you’re already drooling behind his step and that whole tough guy and I-hate-you-oh-so-much-act is just part of it.”
What could I say now? Actually, I couldn’t say anything. Literally. I was at loss for words and the tears came and they fell.
“I’m sorry, Lilly.”
I stared at him, but shook my head.
“No, I mean, I’m sorry I tell you the things like this, but knowing now and like this, it’s much better than later when you do fall deeply in love and you find him having sex with the nanny that takes care of your kids in your bedroom.”
“Ah, hell! It was a good dream!” I yelled not opening my eyes. Maybe if I shut them really tight, I would go back. Maybe…
…if the poking would just stop.
I groaned and threw the pillow that I was trying to cover with aside.
“What’s up?” Alex asked.
I didn’t say anything. And he stared blankly at me.
“What’s up?” he repeated as if I hadn’t heard him.
“’What’s up’? What’s up is that I was having a great dream and you just ruined it for me.” I glared and threw the quilt at him.
“Somebody’s cranky today,” he commented.
"Suck it."
“What are you doing here?"
I shrugged. "Leave me alone," I said as I tried to get back to sleep, but he just poked me again.
"Did you sleep with my brother?"
My head shot at him, and I sat straight, but before I could add something else, Jake came in and I immediately got up and pulled a shirt from his left drawer and gave it to him. "No, we did not sleep together, idiot!" Instead of putting it on right away, Jake stared at it, then at me and wrapped the shirt around his neck while laughing hysterically.
He headed for the bathroom. “Jealous much, Alexander?”
Alex scoffed. “Of?”
Jake poked his head through the door. “That I got some 'Lilly Action'.”
“No, you didn—” I stopped as soon as he winked at me. Jake was doing this to bother his brother. I couldn’t complain. It’d be too horrible if I missed yet another opportunity to mess with Alex after he had messed with my head at the dance.
Alex didn’t respond right away. At first I thought that he didn’t had a nice comeback, but then it felt as if he was choosing his words carefully not to say something he might regret.
“Just worried for Brody. I don’t like him, but I like Lilly less, so I was making sure she was being faithful to him.” He turned his eyes to me. “You are, right? I mean, it’s only your second day in your first official relationship, I can tell.” I thought he said he loathed Brody.
He left the room with me hanging my mouth open. The words were stuck. What a pile of jerk-poo he was. God, how could I think he was gorgeous? He would never stop being his ugly ass self.
“This is not my first official relationship,” I whispered.
But Jake heard. “Did you kiss your last two boyfriends?”
I glared. “How do you know about my previous boyfriends?”
He shrugged. “Brit.”
“Ah.” I shook my head while looking at something other than his eyes. I mean, the dude might think I’m into him, too. Hm. “But that doesn’t mean anything. A relationship is not based on kissing, hugging and other types of affection. More about what you would do for the other person.”
“Well…” he said. “That’s just fifty percent, Lilly.”
“God, I’m such a newbie,” I groaned falling onto the bed.
Jake laughed and came out of the bathroom to sit next to me. “But, Alex does have a point.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Hmm?”
“I know I’m one of your friends and both of us are pretty conscious enough to know that we would never try anything and we respect each other, but just imagine… What if Brody had the same type of relationship we have with his best friend that is a girl. How wou—”
“Jenny,” I interrupted. “He told me that yesterday. That she is his best friend, I mean.”
“Great!” I was confused, but I let him continue. Maybe he would explain himself. “You hate Jenny, right?” I nodded. “Okay, imagine that Brody had the same relationship we have with this Jenny chick. How would you feel if you found out Brody and Jenny had slept together and he was shirtless and she had a very tentative dress on?”
I sighed. “I see your point.”
He petted my head. “Maybe Brody wouldn’t like the idea so much—even if you explained that you just had an emotional breakdown.”
“What if we tell him you’re gay?”
“Lilly…” He raised an eyebrow.
“Sorry.”
~*~*~*~*~
After Jake and I had a warm, nice bath and both of us got breakfast, I headed back to his room. He said he wanted to keep talking to me. This time about something I had said yesterday, but I had said so many things, I could barely remember.
“Yes, Jake?” I opened the door, closed it behind me and pulled one of those bean bags he had in his room or whatever they’re called, but I sat on it.
He was sitting on the bed reading some car magazine, but put it aside when I got in. “Okay, yesterday, you told me Alex had kissed you.”
I rolled my eyes. “I thought this was something different.”
“Well, it is. We were talking about Alex having a point. Now, did that happened before or after Brody asked you to be his girlfriend?”
“Before.”
He let out a relieved breath. “Oh, okay.” I didn’t reply. “Oh, it’s because I don’t want Alex to get into trouble. You know he’s in enough trouble with school and being an idiot and shit.”
I nodded. “Is that it?”
“No.” He looked kind of offended. I smiled. “Now I have to find out why he kissed you.”
“Oh, he said it was because he wanted to somehow 'protect me' from Brody.” I saw he was confused already and I hadn’t even gotten to the other part. “Yeah, he said he loathed him and that he was all bad and stuff. He kissed me because he didn’t want Brody to be my first kiss.”
To my surprise, he started laughing. “And you fell for that shit? Gosh, Lilly, you really are a newbie. That is the lamest excuse I’ve heard in my life! Seriously…”
“I—”
“Lilly, love. Really? If it were sex, would you give it to him?”
I felt my throat tightened. “He looked like he cared and he said it was a favor.”
“Of course you did him a favor. That’s what he wanted because he just wants to hurt you. He wants for you to fall so deeply in love with him and then he will be an asshole to you for the rest of your life.”
“But—”
He sighed. “But what? He told you it didn’t mean anything? That he wouldn’t show any emotions? Babe, that’s his way of getting it and until now, it doesn’t get much old. Actually, I think he’s falling out on the tricks.” He paused to chuckle. “No, actually, I’m a bit mad, because you are just so innocent. Even just a kiss and you’re already drooling behind his step and that whole tough guy and I-hate-you-oh-so-much-act is just part of it.”
What could I say now? Actually, I couldn’t say anything. Literally. I was at loss for words and the tears came and they fell.
“I’m sorry, Lilly.”
I stared at him, but shook my head.
“No, I mean, I’m sorry I tell you the things like this, but knowing now and like this, it’s much better than later when you do fall deeply in love and you find him having sex with the nanny that takes care of your kids in your bedroom.”