A Step to Love

Alexander cuddled next to me while I chatted with Brit for a while. I felt Alex’s fingers play and turn between my hair, every now and then, reaching to my scalp to caress it. I would look every five seconds or so to check if it bothered him that I was talking to Brit, but he only smiled. I told Brit about Jenny, receiving more looks from him.

Just a few feet below Rainbow turned, trying to go back to sleep, its fur causing me to giggle aloud as I hung up.

“Jenny, huh?”

I nodded placing the phone in my bedside table. I then shifted, resting on top of Alex’s shoulder. “Talk about ‘bad luck’. It sucks; I found out that it was not only Math, but three more classes.”

“Mhm?” I nodded again. Alex took my cheek and pulled me close to kiss me. “I’m sorry it had to be on your last year.”

I shrugged. “At least I have Gabriel to back me up in French and Gym.” I took his hand and linked my fingers with his as I remembered Gabriel’s warmth next to my body whenever Jenny would come around to glare with her new army. I never knew she had girl friends. I had only seen her hanging out with Alex and Brody. But it seemed she was sort of popular around a clan like hers, where she was now known as the leader.

“Is that so?” he laughed. “Gabriel is such a pansy. He doesn’t even smack flies.”

“No, he’s been helping. He glares ba—‘pansy’ is not an appropriate word for a guy to say.”

He laughed again, louder this time. The rhythm carried out in to my system. This felt so good, but in a matter of weeks, there was a small chance that it wouldn’t.

After today, I decided not to think about it until the moment came. It was too complicated, too much work. If I got stuck on that thought, I wasn’t going to enjoy our time together.

I sighed. Enjoy...

I grabbed Alex’s head and pressed my lips firmly, taking his full, pale lips to mine sweetly. My tongue reached his in a matter of seconds. He separated a bit, breathed through his mouth and kept on pressing.

I didn’t know what got over me when my fingers hung tightly against his long straight hair and I climbed on top of him pressing myself hard against his clothes. His hands found mine, and instead of keep going like I wanted him to, he pushed me from where I laid and positioned himself on top.

“Hey, hey,” he whispered as he parted. “Everything’s fine.”

I stared into his blue crystals. “Why do you keep saying that? You don’t know.” The thought of fear came again. The fear of “not knowing what will happen”. The fear of regret.

He seriously needed to find another line instead of “everything will be fine”. Everyone said that when they didn’t know what else to say.

He groaned softly and shifted to my side. “What’s this really about?”

I hesitated. “I don’t know…,” I admitted.

“Well if you don’t know, that means there’s nothing to worry about, then.” He sounded annoyed. He knew what I was talking about. I wanted him to forget about what I had just said. I got to my side and pressed my lips to his neck. He reached to my jaw and I moved my lips to his.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered. He just shook his head as the embarrassing hit my cheeks.

~*~*~*~*~

“It was horrible! I wailed at him like Shamu.” Brit laughed and I stared at her silently.

“Wailed at him.” She laughed again. “Get it? Whale? Wailed? Shamu?” She paused on each question to make me understand. But I did understand it.

“Not funny, we didn’t say anything else after that.”

“Stop exaggerating; he was happy when he came back.”

Was I really that insecure? Nevertheless, I rolled my eyes at her. We stopped in front of the door that led to my English class. I coughed involuntary reaching my mouth with a fist and turned to check the time on Brit’s wristwatch.

But before I could see, the bell rung.

She gestured to the door. “Text me.”

I nodded and hugged her before moving forward to the front door and into the classroom. Mr. Roberts was already waiting, dressed in a sharp green buttoned shirt and navy tie. His shirt wasn’t tucked in like last time. He didn’t look so professional, especially with that teenage look on his face and his blonde hair hanging from his hair.

His hazel eyes got a short glimpse of me before putting his hands into the pockets his pants held. His face looked relaxed enough to pass for a nice person, but his voice said the opposite as it told us to give him the assignment for this week: John Keats’ biography.

Of course, I had spent the correct amount of time writing it.

I handed it to him with a proud smile on my face as I passed his desk. He glared. I went to my seat which was exactly five chairs away from him. I sat and pulled my small backpack on top of the tiny desk in front. I opened it slightly and started rummaging through it for my cell phone.

“I don’t understand my English teacher’s attitude. Like I’ve done something bad,” I wrote to Brit. I looked up to see if the teacher was looking, but he was busy asking a guy about the assignment.

I felt a short rush or butterfly come through me. My heart was beating fast and faster. Man, what a wimp.

The cell phone vibrated in my hand and I looked down again, ready to take out my notebook in case the teacher started talking to the class. “Mr. Robinson?”

“Roberts,” I corrected.

I waited a couple of seconds. Brit was an expert at texting fast and never getting caught. I on the other hand, needed some work.

“He’s actually nice. We’re checking out some plays for this semester.”

Hmm. “We’re studying John Keats. I think I told you. And he's not—” I looked up to check, but he was still bombarding the kid. “And he's not nice. He’s…the…panties-in-knot-kind of teacher. He scares me.” I clicked the “send” button before closing it, when Mr. Roberts started talking.

“Thank you those who handed your work, for being responsible. Those who didn’t hand in the biography, along with Lillian for texting during my class, can stay behind after this lecture ends to receive your punishment.”

My eyes widened as the class stared in unison and snickered. I pushed my hand into my cell phone and locking eyes with Mr. Roberts’ amused ones, I texted to Brit, “Yoi duxk.”