Status: If you are reading this thank you for reading my story. This will be a day by day quest to overcome my depression and fight my lonelyness.

Story of My Life: The Untold Story of Me

I never expected to end up here. Writting my life as I go along. I always thought that I would be hanging out with friends right now at the mall or the towncenter. Anywhere would be fine. But the reality of the matter is that I'm lonely and nobody knows it.

Only my parents know and they try so hard to make me go out with friends, but what they do't know is that none of my "friends" ever have time for me. They either can't hang out or they stand me up. It's happened allot.

I'm not the most popular girl at school. I'm just plain old Nikole Torres.

Yes I am a cheerleader, but that doesn't guarantee thousands of friends like I thought it would. If anything, it just causes more drama in my life. Some of the girls think I'm a bitch just because I want the team to be the best that it can be. I also want to become captain and that means I have allot of competition. Cheerleading is just too competitive. Why can't we all just hang out and have fun at practice? Why does there always have to be tension between me and the girls?

I guess I'm just not a likeable person...

I wish I was though.

Maybe this is why I suffer from depression. I'm scarred to let people in to see who I really am and the mask I wear drives people away. I'm working on breaking down the brick wall I've built around myself, but it's hard.

I was bullied every single day in the 5th grade. Ever since then i haven't been the same around people. I'm scarred that they'll judge me and taunt me.

I've lost so many friends this year and now they all hate me. I don't know why, but they do.

Maybe it's time to be more outgoing and call someone, anyone up and ask them to spend time with me. I dont want to be lonely anymore...