Sibling Rivilary

I dusted the shelves in the shop as I listened to my Mother rant and rave to my Father about money. They argued all the time anymore, and it was always about money. It seemed like no matter how hard they tried or how many jobs my Father had we still never had enough money. There were still several bills going unpaid and barely enough money to buy food. My parents were very good actors though. Infront of other people they seemed happy and normal but as soon as they were alone it was obvious my Parents were the farthest thing from happy. Everyone in my family was stressed and taking it out on each other, and since my Father showed up at the store it got worse. I moved to dust a shelf closer to them to hear exactly what they were arguing about this time.
“James listen to me! We can’t afford this, I know but what am I supposed to do? Tell Amy she can’t buy a dress for the fair? Tell Olivia she can’t go back to school because we cannot afford the tuition? I don’t know what else to do anymore.”
“I know I know Carly. It is not like I planned to get this letter, it is not like I am asking them to do this. I can’t stop it. I am working as much as I can but it isn’t enough.”
“Well then we have to figure out something. I am not taking these things away from our kids they are suffering enough as it is, and once they find out the bank is threating to foreclose the house they will be even more worried.”
I almost knocked the items off the shelf I was dusting because I was listening so carefully to my Parents conversation. I could not believe what I just heard. I knew things were bad and money was tight but I had no idea we were in danger of losing our house. I had no idea how they were going to try and fix this problem. I continued to listen to their conversation and ended up tripping over a pile of empty boxes. It would have been no big deal but I managed to pull down two shelves of glass ornaments as I feel. Both of my parents spun around to see me laying on the ground next to a large pile of shattered glass and broken shelves. I watched as the expression on my Mother’s face changed from worried to anger. Her face began to turn red and her voice cracked as she began to speak. With each word she said her voice grew louder and louder.
Her hands were flying through the air as she yelled at me for eavesdropping and trashing several pieces of inventory. I just lay on the floor as she yelled and screamed. I knew she was not really mad at me, and she knew it was an accident but she just got done saying to my father there was no way they could make enough money to pay all the bills. Then I went and ruined several items that could have been sold to help make money for the family. My father interrupted my Mother’s yelling and asked her to calm down. He tried to explain that it was just an accident and that she did not need to be screaming at me.
Unfortunately this just angered my Mother more. She became angry at my Father for standing up for me, and for making her look like a bad mother because she yelled at me. The entire situation had been completely blown out of proportion because of all of the stress both my Parents were under. My little klutz moment was the cherry to top the ice cream Sunday of drama that was surrounding my family.
With both my Parents screaming and cursing at each other I was ready to cry, I felt horrible for making things worse. I stood up and ran outside to the back of the shop. When I caught my breath I just sat on the stoop and cried. I was crying because my arm was in pain from the cuts I had just given myself, I was crying because I caused my parents to get in yet another argument, and I was crying because there was a very large chance I might have lost my home. Since I went away for school drama in my family had just continued to build. The money problems grew, while my parents grew farther and farther apart. My entire would seemed to be slowly spinning out of control.
I stood up and ran outside, I didn’t want to hear them fight anymore. I did not want to be a part of the drama anymore. I just wanted to come home and enjoy my Thanksgiving break. I wished I was six years old again, I wished I could go back to the time in my life when things were simple, and I did not have to listen to the fighting. I wished I could go back to the time when my biggest problem was whether or not I was going to dress my dolls in green or pink. As I walked around to the side of the building I wiped the tears from my eyes.
Problems with money, my family, my social life, and school all seemed to be too much at that time. As I slowly made my way to the alter I knew that those problems were nothing compared to what I was about to face. At least during that time my family was shaken up, but we still had each other. We all still were working to find a way to solve the problems we faced. I scanned the faces of the people standing in the pews. I was secretly hoping to see Amy’s face appear.
I couldn’t stop the tears from falling as images flooded my mind. The images of everything that led to the moment when I lost my sister, I tried to hold back the tears as I got closer to the alter. I wanted to be crying tears of joy not tears of regret. I was split into two, I was so happy to be marrying the man I loved and who loved me, but I desperately wished I was getting married under different circumstances.
I sat against the side of the building and buried my face in my arms. I took a deep breath and tried to just relax. Being alone gave me the chance to clear my head. I pulled my knees to my chest and just sat curled up.
“Liv? Is that you? Are you ok?”
At first I wasn’t even aware anyone was there. My Mother hated when people called me Liv. She would always say, “Her name is Olivia! I named her Olivia not Liv!” Most of my friends got used to it and only called me Olivia. Slowly I raised my head to see Christian squatting down next to me.
“Liv? What is wrong? Can I help you?”
“No..” I managed to say as I cleared my throat.
“What is wrong? Liv.. I am going to see Amy, should I bring her here?”
“No! Stop!” I practically jumped to my feet as I yelled at Christian. I knew he was only trying to help, but the last thing I wanted was to get Amy involved in all of this drama. It was obvious my parents did not want to announce to my sister and brother that we could possibly lose our house.
“Liv…”
“Stop calling me that.”
“What?”
“My name is Olivia.”
“Oh.. I am sorry. Olivia what is wrong?”
“Nothing.”
“Um sorry to be the one to point this out but you are sitting on the ground crying.”
“I am not crying.”
Christian laughed as he whipped the smeared make up off my cheek. He sat down on the ground next to me and leaned up against the building. I waited for him to say something, anything or even ask me what was wrong again. But he didn’t, instead he just sat there in silence next to me. He picked up a stick that was lying on the ground in between us, he tried to balance the stick on his finger. The stick swayed and wobbled while she swiftly moved his finger back and forth. After about 30 seconds of moving his finger around the stick stayed perfectly balanced on the tip of his finger. I began to giggle as I saw the look of concentration on Christian’s face. He was biting his tongue as it stuck out from the side of his mouth, and his eyes were barely open so they looked like thin little slits.
“What?” Christian said as he turned towards me to see me giggling. Then he realized what I was laughing at and he also began to laugh. Christian put the stick back down where he found it and sighed as he leaned his head back against the wall. He looked up at the sky and began to smile. I looked up to see what he was smiling at, but I couldn’t see anything. The sky was a light blue, the sun was falling behind the buildings and there was not a cloud in sight.
“What is it? What are you smiling at?”
“Oh it is nothing.”
“No tell me… what is it?”
“It is not important.” He looked at me and smirked, and I knew he was trying to make a point when he asked me what was wrong I just ignored him and yelled at him.
“I am sorry… “
“You have nothing to apologize for.”
“What were you smiling at?”
“The sky… it is perfect. The sun is shining, the birds are flying and there are no clouds. It is just the kind of sky that makes you want to smile.”
He was right; I looked up at the sky and couldn’t help but smile. The day was perfect. It was the kind of day that I would have loved to spend at the park writing or taking pictures.
“Oh great Liv… I mean Olivia!”
“Hahaha what are you talking about?”
“I have been trying to get you to smile since I sat down, you laughed at me for like five seconds, but you didn’t really smile.”
Christian stood up and put his hand out, I reached up for his hand and cleaned the dirt off the back of my legs. I had just met Christian two day before and I already felt completely comfortable around him. He already helped me twice.
“Hey I … I wanted to thank you for yesterday. I mean for helping me out and standing up for me.”
“Oh don’t worry about it. I was sort of surprised Amy was acting that way. I mean from the moment we walked into the store she became a different person, jumping around and screaming. I thought she was just excited to see you, but then she started saying all those thing about you.”

“Amy and I tease each other a lot it really wasn’t a big deal.”
“Yeah I knew that I mean the stuff she was saying to your Mother about you and how you work all the time.”
I felt my cheeks turn red as I looked at my feet to hide my embarrassment. Again I was ashamed to admit to Christian that I was a bit of a loner. I wasn’t sure why I felt so embarrassed but I did and more than anything I just wanted to change the subject.
Christian still holding my hand bent down to look me in the eyes. He was just about to say something when Amy came around the corner. Both of our heads turned to watch her run up to us. I quickly pulled my hand away from Christian’s and took a step back. As I stepped away Christian turned to look at me, but then Amy was standing next to him pulling at his sleeve. She was complaining because he was late and they were going to lose their table at the restaurant. Amy turned to look at me, I must still have had some make up smudged under my eyes because she asked me what was wrong. I looked at Christian then back at her. There was no way I was going to tell her what I heard our parents talking about. I just hoped that Christian would not tell her that he saw me here crying.
Thankfully Amy was too concerned with losing her reservations to question me about what had happened. She ran back up the street pulling Christian behind her. I stood and watch as he turned back to look at me just as they turned the corner.