Only lonely & ***ed up

She arrived home humming to an obnoxiously stupid song sang by Taylor Swift, one of her guilty pleasures, that one with the ‘and you’ve got a smile that could light up this whole town’ line, somewhat feeling the tune quite fitting with the time being.

“Someone’s been feeling better, I guess?”, came from the recliner perched in front of the tv in the living room.

She looked at her mother with worried eyes as she set the bags filled with food on the table. Her mother was so full of life back then, she worked two jobs and was up and running from place to place all day long and still managed to keep the house in order, the pantry filled with goods and her, her sister and her father all in line. It was heart breaking seeing her so frail and being able to do nothing about it.

“I think I just needed some fresh air to clear my mind, mom, there was nothing wrong with me before!”, Anna said with a chuckle following.

She knew her mother saw right through her but at the same time, she saw right through her mother too. As a mom, it was evident the concern towards her youngest daughter graduating with no perspective of what to do next in her future.

“You know, you should meet a cute boy and that would clear your mind right away, everyday,” her mother said smiling weakly.

“I wish I did too! Just seen the cutest guy ever while I was waiting for the food. But you know I can’t deal with boys again after what happened with…,” She trailed off earning a knowing smile from her mother. “Let’s just eat something before Grace comes home with Stephen and he eats it all, that boy has an appetite!” Anna changed the subject.

And case closed.

~~~~~

As if it was her own personal alarm clock, her dog Ben, a cute black and white border collie, came fussing over and nuzzling her hand in order to wake her up.

“Okay, Benny, I’m up,” she said still half way sleepy, but getting up and heading over to her bathroom for her morning routine. She dressed up in a plain green t-shirt, floral shorts and running shoes. Ben was always hyper early so it was up to her to take him for a walk around the neighborhood.

She quickly headed to her mother’s bedroom to check her up and, with a sigh, noticing a slight snoring, meaning her mother was finally in a somewhat deep slumber.

Stopping by to grab something to eat, she spotted her father reading the newspaper and said, “Hey, dad, it would be super if you wouldn’t let Ben in when you wake up, he goes straight to my room to wake me up! I wanted to sleep, you know?”

“I know! But he looked at me with those eyes, I had to let him in,” he said with bright eyes, Anna was definitely his favorite and pets were their thing.

“Well, once I’m finished eating this I’m out of here to take him for a walk. I’ll be back as soon as possible,” She let her father know.

“No need to worry, honey, one of your aunts is stopping by before I go to work to spend the day with your mom, you should be enjoying your time out before your last semester at college. Be a young person and go out!,” Her father was, too, preoccupied with his youngest daughter. Why wouldn’t her turn out to be more like her older sister Grace? Grace had everything together and was far more independent and just overall, emotionally strong. But not Anna. Anna was a dreamer, too far inside her own world, a bit scarred of relationships overall and just, so… Fragile.

“C’mon, baby, let’s get you out of here pretty boy,” She said grabbing her iPod and putting on the earphones while patting between Ben’s ears gaining a woof from her furry friend. And there they went side by side through the neighborhood.

It was good to be simply walking around, listening to good music, as if there was no care in her world. She didn’t care how she probably looked like hell, she must have bags under her eyes, her hair was tied up but she haven’t bothered to comb it first, her clothes were kind of wrinkled and she wasn’t sure they matched or clashed with her chipping yellow nail polish.

Not even two blocks away from home, Anna heard a soft sound of music overpowering her own, she looked around and saw a white pickup truck driving by. And she started getting self conscious about all those things about her appearance she wasn’t caring half a minute before as soon as she noticed the driver.

She could recognize that beautiful smile anywhere, though his gorgeous green eyes were covered up with a pair of black Ray-Bans sunglasses.