I Won't Give Up

"Daddy!" I called out as soon as his face appeared on my laptop screen. It was early in my first year in Pittsburgh with Jordan and I was not having the easiest time adjusting. Having Skype sessions with my parents was becoming a near daily thing.

"Is everything alright, princess?" my father questioned with concern filling his voice.

"No," I choked out and tears began to stream down my face. Even through crappy webcams, I knew the tears falling from my eyes could be seen clear as day, if my dad's facial expression was any indication. "I want to come home."

"That doesn't sound like you. What's wrong?"

"It's not just one big thing. It's a bunch of little things," I tried to explain. "Alone they don't really affect me much, but altogether it's really overwhelming and just too much. I know I came here so I could stay with Jordan, but he isn't around much so I think I would be better off at home."

"What do you mean he isn't around?" my father demanded, sound a little angry. Daddy has always been really protective with me and would even get mad at his own sons if he thought they weren't taking care of me.

"It's not his fault, Daddy," I began to defend my twin brother. "He's just got so much going on right now with practices and games and training and getting to know his team and charity events and signings. The list of stuff he has to do goes on for miles, but I completely understand. It's not like he's never home, it's just never when I need him most and it's hard."

"Sweetheart, I'm so sorry. But just think, it's already late October. Only two months until you and your brother come back home for Christmas." I knew he was right. He was always right. "And it's still only October, Jordan has less than a month of this NHL stuff under his belt. Once he becomes better adjusted there, he'll find a routine, the two of you with find a routine together, and everything will fall into place."

"Do you really think so?"

"Absolutely, Joella!"

"So you don't want me to come home?"

"I love you, princess. I miss you everyday - every minute even - but I know everything you need right now is in Pittsburgh. I wouldn't be a very good dad if I wanted you to come home just because I miss you instead of encouraging you to do what is best for you."

"And you are the very bestest, daddy."

"JJ! I hope you're not at the library! I know I said I was going out with some of the guys tonight, but I thought a twin night would be better! I got Chinese food!" Jordan yelled from the kitchen of their apartment.

"And as the bestest daddy, I believe that you can survive out there." A smile appeared on my face for the first time in the whole Skype chat, and that was enough of a response for my dad. "Now go hangout with your brother. you two need each other."

"Thank you, daddy. I love you."

"Love you too, Joella."

*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*

"Here here here," I bounced around the apartment in excitement, shoving my phone into Claude's hands. "Take my picture so I can send it to my brothers!"

Claude had gotten me literally the best present ever. It put the biggest, cheesiest grin on his face to see how much joy it had brought me. I was newly decked out in a bright orange Flyers jersey. Sure, I had a handful of these already. I had one I brought to Philly with me and one I had left at home in the Burgh. But those had Claude's name and number on the back. This one had my name on it along with Claude's number so I was still supporting him. But my name! Mine! This was the only time 'Staal' would ever make an appearance on a Philadelphia Flyers jersey.

"They are going to kill me for this," he chuckled as he snapped a picture of me with my arms spread open to show off the jersey. Then I turned around so he could take another of the back.

I sent the pictures to all of my brothers minus Marc, seeing as I still wasn't too pleased with him. He was going to get to see it that night anyway.

The Rangers were coming to Philly for their last game before their four day Christmas break. Claude had stolen my phone and texted Marc, offering to let him stay at the apartment that night instead of going to a hotel because we had an early flight to Raleigh in the morning. All three of us. Claude was joining my family for Christmas and I couldn't tell if the butterflies in my stomach were from excitement or nerves.

Responses from my brothers simultaneously came back rather quickly.

Text message from Jarebear
That's so adorable I'm going to vomit.

Text message from Erictacular
If I see that in my house tomorrow, it's being thrown in the fire.

Text message from JJ
Leave that thing in Philly. It's not welcome here.

I showed Claude the texts and he quietly chuckled. I could tell he was nervous. Claude had yet to be in the same place as all of my brothers at once since we started dating. Seeing them on the ice is a lot different than face to face on a personal level.

"Marc too busy planning to kill me out there tonight to text you back?"

"I didn't text him."

"Joella..."

"Can we not do this right now?" I walked towards the front door to get away from him and his condescending tone, trying to make it clear that I didn't want to have this discussion. "I'm really happy and excited about this game. Can we just go?"

Claude huffed in defeat but nodded anyway. Soon enough we were in his car on our way to the Wells Fargo Center.

*~*~*~*~*

"I think I'm just going to go to bed," Marc mumbled upon the three of us entering Claude's apartment after the game. It was the first thing he said since we left the rink. It was the first thing any of us, besides Claude, said since we left the rink. It was an awkwardly silent drive, complete with Claude trying to start conversations just to be shut down with more silent.

"No you're not. We're celebrating," Claude announced and made his way to the kitchen to get a bunch of beers from the fridge before returning to the living room and taking a seat on the couch.

"Why?" Marc questioned looking thoroughly confused. "You didn't win tonight."

"But you did and I'm not gonna deprive you of a few celebratory beers just because you aren't with your team." Claude took the top off a beer bottle before holding it out for Marc to take. Marc continued to look at him skeptically as he accepted the bottle and took a drink. "Plus, we're gonna play NHL '13 and it being my game makes it impossible to beat me." Marc smirked and sat next to Claude on the couch.

"We'll see about that, cover boy," Marc joked and I was shocked it didn't come out completely covered in hatred.

"I'm just gonna go shower and finish packing for tomorrow," I stated, sounding a little uneasy. Were Marc and Claude really getting along? That was too unreal. What was Claude doing anyway? Trying to get along with my least favorite brother; one I was currently fighting with, nonetheless. What was his angle?

"Alright, sweetheart. Hurry back though, you got winner," Claude replied, not removing his eyes from the TV screen as he set up the game.

I nodded my head, not that either of them were paying attention to me to notice, before leaving the room. But I didn't hurry back. I didn't go back at all. I didn't even shower and pack like I said I was going to. All I did was collapse on the bed I shared with Claude and went to sleep. Not before sending a quick text first.

Text Message to Daddy
I can't wait to see you tomorrow. I miss you.

Text Message from Daddy
Tomorrow can't get here soon enough, princess. I miss you too.

*~*~*~*~*

I ran into my father's arms as soon as I saw him waiting for us in baggage claim the following day. I was never sure why, but all I wanted at the time was for my dad to hug me, kiss the top of my head, and tell me that everything was going to be alright. I may have just seen him a couple of weeks prior, but enough was never enough. I wished he were around all the time.

Eric was there to pick Claude, Marc and I up as well. He greeted Claude and Marc as I clung to my father.

"How was Philly, princess?" he questioned as he went to grab my bag for me.

"Good. Nowhere near as good as Thunder Bay though. I think I'm going to go home with you and mom after Christmas," I answered and beamed up at him as he slung his arm over my shoulders and began to walk towards the airport exit.

"I'm not so sure about that," Eric muttered to himself but I still heard him.

"What's that supposed to mean, E?" A smirk appeared on his face as he made eye contact with Marc. They both simply shrugged their shoulders as they continued walking. I turned to look at my father. "Daddy?"

"I'm not a mind reader, Joella," he laughed and comfortingly rubbed my arm. "I always know what Jordan and Jared are thinking before they even think it, but not so much with these two."

That caused the group to laugh and the conversation was dropped.

"My god! I'm such an idiot!" I exclaimed while luggage was being piled into the back of Eric's SUV. "Daddy, this is Claude," I announced as I grabbed a hold of Claude's arm and pulled in the direction of my dad with a huge grin on my face; the kind I used to get when I was little and returned home from a day out at our barn, yelling, "Daddy! Daddy! Look what I found!" while carrying a stray cat. "Claude, this is my dad."

"It's nice to finally meet you, sir," Claude greeted with his adorable shy smile and gave my father a firm handshake.

"I'm glad to meet you too, son. And none of that 'sir' business here. Mr. Staal will be just fine."

"Okay, Mr. Staal," Claude returned and looked at me a little unsure of himself. I glanced around at my family just to see smirks on all three of their faces.

"Don't try to be intimidating, Daddy. It doesn't fit you." And with that, everyone started piling into Eric's SUV. I grabbed onto Claude's hand before he could climb into the back row of seats. "You gonna relax anytime soon?" He simply shrugged his shoulders. I could see his nervousness in his eyes. "He was joking, baby. You can call him Henry. And my mother isn't going to accept you referring to her as anything short of mom." This made him crack a smile and let out a breath that I'm sure he didn't even know he was holding.