We'll Fall in Love After Midnight

I looked around the room I was in, confused. I looked over at the lightly snoring body next to me and saw Mike. Oh now I remember. I sat up slowly and got out of his bed without waking it, and walked into the attached bathroom. I left the door open while I peed and cleaned up my face. I grabbed his mouthwash and used some so he wouldn't be grossed out by my morning breath.

Mike was still sleeping when I walked back out. I laid back down and checked my phone. I saw a long text from Austin. My thumbs danced around until I decided to open it.

look, I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for being a major asshole to you, you're not a bitch. I take you and our relationship for granted. I wanna change that though. I promise when I come home I'll work on being better for me and you. I love you so much, but I know you love me more and sometimes I wish you didn't. I can't wait to kiss you when I come home. call me when you wake up.

I looked over at a still sleeping Mike and got out of his bed again. I walked into the kitchen and clicked on his name to call him.

Austin told someone he'd be right back. "Hello?"

"Hey," I said sweetly.

"How are you?" He asked.

I sighed and sat on the counter. "I'm fine. I just woke up a few minutes ago. How are you?"

"I feel like a dick after what happened last night."

"It's fine, I'm over it," I said truthfully.

Mike walked into the kitchen and smiled at me. I smiled back and went back to listening to Austin talk. Mike knew who I was talking to and didn't care. He came over to me and began sucking on my neck and placing his hand over the thin cotton of my panties. I was using everything in my body to not moan.

"Hey, I gotta go. I'll call you back later," I said quickly and hung up. I set the phone down and pulled Mike from my neck. "What are you doing?!"

A devilish smile creeped onto his face. "Don't ask questions." He continued to rub me and began kissing my lips.

I pulled him deeper, our tongues fighting each other. I spread my legs more for him.

"Lets go back to my room," he after pulling away. He picked me up and carried me back to his room, continuing to makeout.

As soon as he laid me on the bed, he pulled my panties off of me and tossed them to the floor. I buried my head deeper into the pillows as I felt his tongue begin exploring me. I finally released the moan, and then some, that I was holding in. He put his right index finger in me, pumping it in and out, while he continued to lick my clit. He finished after he licked up the end result.

I kissed him when he came back up, holding himself up on his hands over me. I could taste myself on his lips. "I love when you do that," I whispered.

He smiled, "I love tasting you, so we both benefit from it." He gave me a wink and kissed me again. He got off of his hands and laid next to me.

I rolled over to my side, propping my head up with my hand. "I don't wanna have sex...yet," I said shyly.

He nodded and place his hand on my hip, rubbing the skin over the bone with his thumb. "I understand. I think that's why I don't try to get head from you."

"Thanks... I just feel like I'm technically not cheating if I don't do anything back, ya know?" he nodded again. "I like you though. Just right now, I feel like I should be with Austin." I looked away and swallowed back tears. "I feel so stupid for saying that."

"Don't feel stupid. You're just confused as to what you need and want," he said. "I'll keep being your friend, and if the time was right, we could be more."

I smiled at him and placed my hand on his cheek. "Why are you so understanding?" I asked.

He laughed lightly and smiled bigger, "because I know what its like to not be understood in a relationship."

-

Even though he lived 2 hours away, Mike was constantly by my side doing stuff with me. From going with me to photoshoots and going to parties to grocery shopping and lounging around. I still didn't feel guilty about any of it. In the back of my mind though, I was feeling like all of it would come and bite me in the ass later on.

"Austin comes home in two days," I said quietly when a commercial on TV came on.

"For how long?" Mike asked, his voice the same level.

I gulped and looked at my hands, "about two months."

He shook his head, "I don't know how long I can go without seeing you after being with you so much the past few weeks."

"I know. Think about I feel, I have to see my boyfriend and go back to that life with him." Mike scooted closer to me so he could give me a hug. "I fucked up, Mike. I fucked up."

"No you didn't, Maci. You've done nothing wrong."

-

I smiled at my dorky looking boyfriend and his friends as they walked up to me in the airport. "You guys look like a fucking gang," I joked and hugged them all, purposely ignoring Austin who held his arms out for me.

He touched his chest, "ouch. That's not nice, you know I have a heart problem." I noticed Phil and Jaxin give me a look when he said that.

I finally turned to him, letting go of Tino. "Oh, musta missed you there." I smiled and hugged him tightly. He walked us away from the group in a hug while they began collecting the luggage and gear.

"I missed you so much," he said and cupped my face so he could kiss me.

"I bet you do." I smiled and leaned up to kiss him again.

Everyone finished getting their stuff and parted their separate ways, Austin coming home with me. I held his hand as we drove back to my apartment. We stopped to get In n Out first. He looked like he needed to tell me something the whole time, but I didn't bug him about it while we ate.

"I need to tell you something," Austin said once we were at my place, getting ready for bed.

"What is it?" I asked, pulling on one of his shirts, something I hadn't done in a long time.

He finished stripping down to his boxers and sat on the edge of the bed. He rubbed his face with his palms and ran his fingers through his hair before looking at me. "I don't know how to even say it." His voice began to shake.

I sat in his lap and ran my fingers through his hair, "just tell me, baby."

He closed his eyes, "promise you won't get mad at me."

"I promise." I began to get worried because I had no idea what he was going to say.

"Last week after one of our shows, I was sitting in the van and was having really bad chest pains. Like, I was laying down and just crying because I thought I was going to die. The guys took me to the ER and they examined me. He said I'm going to need to see a specialist when I got home and stuff." He finally looked at me.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I said through tears.

"Because I didn't wanna worry you. I didn't want you to get upset and cancel what ever jobs you were doing to come out to see me," he said. He wiped my tears and kissed my head. "It'll be okay, baby. I'm gonna schedule an appointment this week and figure all of this out."

"I swear to God, Austin, if you ever keep something like that from me again, I will kill you before your heart does."

He chuckled. "I promise I won't hide anything anymore."

We finally got into bed. I laid with my back to him, his arms around him. I felt so much anger in me towards Austin for keeping something like this from me. It made me wonder what else he could be hiding from me if he hid something major like this from me.

The next day, Austin got on top of finding a heart specialist. I texted Mike telling him what happened. He thought it was wrong that he wouldn't say anything to me about it and he agreed that he could be hiding more.

"I have an appointment next week. You can go with me right?" He held my hand.

"Of course. I'll go to all of them," I told him and kissed his cheek.

"So, for Thanksgiving my dad wanted to come out here and go to your family's dinner. Would that be okay?" He looked nervous to ask.

"Of course." I smiled. "Gonna meet your dad at the same time you meet my parents... That'll be interesting." We both laughed.

"How crazy, we've almost been together a year." He laced our fingers and pulled me onto him.

I kissed him. "That is crazy. It's flown by." I analyzed his face; he looked tired, but happy.

-

We walked out of the doctor's office hand in hand. I could tell he was trying his hardest not to cry until we got to my car. He broke down as soon as he closed the door.

I rubbed his back and felt myself getting upset, "it's going to be okay, baby. I promise it will be."

"I'm so fucking scared, Mace, so fucking scared. I have to get heart surgery. Do you know how nerve wrecking that is?" He cried harder. "And I'm going to have to quit my band."

I crawled over the center console and straddled him, pulling him into a hug. He wrapped his arms around me and cried into the crook of my neck. "I'm going to be right here, through it all. I promise, Austin, I won't leave you alone." He finished crying and I got back in the driver's seat. "Well, luckily I have another shirt in the backseat," I said as I looked at my tear and snot stained shirt.

He chuckled and wiped his eyes, "sorry." He leaned over and kissed me.

Everything was about to change it scared me. I don't know what scared me more: the journey I was about to go on with Austin or not see Mike as much.