A Very Personal Entry From My Diary.

This is my forth diary. In the last diary entry, it was my first day back at Paul Academy. A lot has happened since then.

First off: Thomas. Him and Robert have become really close. Sometimes I feel like I'm the third wheel. I try to ignore it ... but it just won't go away! I mean, ever since Thomas went to Robert's house, they're been closer than twin brothers!

I know I'm being silly and stupid, but the feeling just follows me around. I think that if it wasn't such a loud-talker, they'd completely forget about me. Nobody really notices me. If I missed a day, nobody would realize it.

Nobody would understand why I felt this way, probably. But, Thomas and I used to be soo close!! Now, it feels like there's a mile between us, and it's slowly getting farther. We're still pretty close, though.

Maybe if I were more exciting! Then maybe I'd fit in with them. I mean, Thomas' got that looney-toon life. Robert's funny, an artist, and has a million pets! Not to mention that his family is exciting! — from what I hear.

And what am I? No one. When I first started a year ago ... I was that new, shy, quiet girl who caught Chcarles' eye. I was a nobody. Charles was known and feared! Once Thomas and I broke off from him, we became approachable. It was hardly any work, but we climbed our way back up.

That's really the end of that story. Later on, we became friends with Robert.

Not that interesting, is it?

Yeah. And once Charles left, I become more talkative. I went back to being my old self.

See! I need to be more exciting! Then maybe I'll fit in with them!

Look at me. I'm not even counting myself as part of The Group. Yeah, we sorta call us that still.

I'm being so stupid. So melodramatic. Thomas and I are still friends. Gosh, I'm such an idiot.

I just like Thomas. I think everyone got to me. I mean, everyone says that we'd be perfect for each other ... but really? Are we? I guesss we'll never know. Why? Because I'll probably never tell Thomas that I like him.

Sometimes I feel like screaming it to the world. To just tell Thomas that I like him, and see his reaction. Then, if he doesn't like me (whic he doesn't) he won't ever remember. Sometimes I really just wanna tell him. Just so that he knew!

But, that can never happen. Thomas would never look at me the same. Plus (and I know this is a shallow thought) my reputation is being "one of the guys." I'm not supposed to crush on anyone!

I know. I'm a shallow, stupid girl. I'm a Drama Queen. I'm overly dramatic. I'm a dreamer. The list of flaws (other than that dreamer part) can go on forever. I'm full of 'em.

Well, I'm babbling. I'm sure you have a lot og better things to read about.