My Only One

"So I was thinking..." Jack looked at me. We were walking down my street together. It was Monday, after school, and I had just probably failed a calculus exam.

"Well that's certainly amazing! How was it? Did your brain explode?" I teased and smiled up at him. He bumped hips with me and laughed.

"No for real," He paused, and stuck his hands down his jeans pockets.

"Okay, spit it out..."

"Since you want to be a photographer and stuff, and since All Time Low is just starting out... Maybe you would want to go on tour with us? Maybe shoot a few pictures to start a portfolio or something?" He shrugged, kicking some rocks. My stomach fluttered with excitement. That would be amazing. "I can tell you like the idea..." He laughed and put his arm around me. My stomach flipped. Whoa.

That has never happened before around Jack.

I thought about myself on tour with them. It would be awesome, and I would be able to get away from my parents. Except, I'm not sure they would let me go. With all the arguing, I'm not sure I could leave them like that either. Surely Jack would understand why I would have to decline. "I can't." I shook my head. He stopped and looked perplexed.

"Why not?" He asked.

I sighed. I thought back to the night that Jack found out about everything that was going on in my family. It wasn't a pleasant night, but I'm pretty sure it brought Jack and I much closer together.

---

I pulled my knees to my chest and hitched a sob. I shouldn't have even brought up going to Cedar Point with Alexis, and Tara. I knew my mom and step father wouldn't go for it at all. It was cold, and I hadn't bothered searching for my shoes, or my jacket. It was right after, "Rachel you spoiled brat! Why the hell do you think we have the money for that? You stupid bitch." My mom yelled at me. To this my step father began a second argument with my mother about reasons why we didn't have the money for it. Somewhere in the midst of all this, I snuck out to the tree house. The one my dad built for me when I was 5. The only background noise I could hear was the sound of my parents yelling inside the house.

All because of me.

"Pebs?" Jack's head popped up from the ladder. I looked at him for a minute and attempted to hide my tears. He was getting big for a sophomore, really tall. But nevertheless he was still skinny, and still my best friend. "Hey! I thought you could help me do my Biology homework!" He said, slugging his book into the treehouse and wrapping his jacket around himself tighter. I was in Biology too, despite being a freshman. I have always loved science, and Jack didn't really ever get much of it. I refused to look at him, refused to cry in front of him.

How embarrassing.

"Rachel?" He asked, when I didn't respond. I hitched another sob. "Where are your shoes?" He crawled in and sat real close to me. "Are you okay?"

I choked out another sob, and gave up, letting the tears slide down my face. "I-I left them inside." I said, and pushed some wetness off my cheeks. "And yah, I'm fine."

"You don't look fine." He said, and put his hand on my knee. I heard my mom scream, and Jack's head snapped around to look at my window in my house. "Are you upset because your parents are fighting?" He asked. I nodded. "Do they fight a lot?" I nodded again.

"It's all my fault. I'm such a bitch." I said, practically quoting what my mom had told me earlier.

Jack shook his head, "It's not your fault. You're not a bitch. Trust me." He said, and sat there awkwardly, unsure of what to do next. My teeth started chattering, and I pulled my knees closer to my chest. "Here." Hack shrugged off his jacket. "Your lips are blue." He stated, and shrugged the warm jacket over me. It smelled just like his cologne. I relaxed against the warmth from his body heat.

"Thanks." I half smiled. When I noticed he was staring at me, he looked away and blushed.

"So, I can't seem to figure out mitosis..." He opened his book. I laughed, and helped him flip through the pages.

---

"I barely have enough money to afford the new Canon camera, let alone go on a tour with you guys." I explained.

"I can pay for that." He shrugged. I pursed my lips.

"Why do you always do that?" I asked, slightly annoyed.

"Do what?" He ran to keep up with me. I was speeding away.

"Offer to pay for shit for me. You know I hate when people give me sympathy! So just stop!" I finished, blowing him off.

"I'm just trying to help." He muttered, following into step with me.

"Well don't." I said clearly, and sharply. I could feel my eyes start to water as I said it. Jack looked at me for a second, and then began walking the other direction. "Where are you going?" I asked, turning around.

"I'll catch you later then." Jack said, putting his hands in is pockets as he walked back towards his apartment. I sighed.

"Fuck." I said to myself, only to look to my left and see a little boy standing in his yard staring at me with wide eyes. "Don't repeat that." I pointed a finger at him, and he nodded. I took out my old ipod shuffle that I got for a birthday present three years ago and headed back towards my house.