Dark Side

Flight 114 has now landed safely in Wolverhampton. We hope that you've enjoyed your flight. The ringing of the speakers above me disrupted my casual sleep. I rushed to grab my things as I unbuckled myself from the plane's seat. As I got off the plane, I could smell it, that fresh familiar scent of nostalgia rising up to greet me. I remembered this place, though it had been four years since I'd been home in England. I was glad to leave the United States, to be honest. After my four years in college in another country, I was just glad to be done, I was glad to be home. Yes, I was leaving my best friend Holly there, but I needed to be home. So many things had happened while I was away; I'd changed in many ways, especially after the accident. My mum wanted me to come home, she wanted me to be safe, but I'd sworn to her that I was fine, and that it wouldn't happen again. And I was sorry that I lied to her, I couldn't stop, no matter what I did, how hard I tried.

Shaking my thoughts away for the moment, I found my luggage as I waited ten minutes, grabbing its handle, I lifted it off the conveyor belt and began walking to the exit where my mom would be meeting me. When I found that familiar face, and that beautiful smile that she'd always worn, I quickened my pace, feeling the luggage behind me slap against my legs.

“Lana!” I heard my mother muffle against me as I wrapped myself into her arms. I could smell her perfume, she'd always used the same kind. I missed this, I missed being with her all the time, it'd been so long, and now I could have this back.

“Mum,” I sighed with a smile on my face, “I've missed you so much,” We pulled apart and smiled at each other, this familiar embrace got me this time. I felt a tear slide down my cold cheeks and quickly wiped it away.

“Oh, sweetie, come on, let's go home. You can see your brother, he's back in town too.” My mum grabbed my luggage and I followed behind her, listening intently on new about my brother.

“Wait,” I countered back, stopping in my place. “Liam is back in town? What about his band?”

My mum chuckled, squeezing my arm, “You haven't been around, I'd forgotten,” She winked at me with another laugh, “They're on holiday right now, so they won't need to go back to work for at least a couple months, surprisingly. I didn't think Simon had the heart to let them do such a thing,” I laughed at that, my mom never found him to be that thrilling, as did I. Though I was never around when Liam went off to pursue his dreams, I kept in touch on a regular basis to find out what was going on.

“So the whole band went to their homes, I'm presuming?” I looked at my mom as we both hopped into the car.

She shook her head. “Nope, they're all staying with us.”

“Mum!” I gasped, how could she let five boys parade around the house for two months? No, I wouldn't allow that – I'd never get any sleep with that.

“What,” she laughed at my outburst, “they like being together, and I do too, so I accept their request to stay here as long as they don't make a mess, or complete fools out of themselves – which might be hard for them.” she chuckled again as we pulled out of the airport and onto the road.

Truthfully, I'd never met Liam's friends, and part of me didn't want to. I had seen them all, and they were very attractive in my eyes. They all looked friendly enough, but that got to a certain point in my book, and I wasn't going to handle their chaos very nicely. But I was looking forward to seeing my little brother, I missed him dearly while I was away. The last time I'd seen him was when I had the accident. It's hard to think about, seeing his face as he rushed out of the X-Factor to come to see me all the way across the water. I'd pleaded to him to forgive me, and he did, but I could see the disappointment on his face, and it killed me. But I was relieved when he said he wouldn't tell anyone – other than my mum, who was in the room with us – and then of course Holly. It was an accident, what I did. Sort of. I just couldn't stand how I looked. I felt so fat, and I needed all of that to be gone. It made me sick, literally. I wouldn't eat, ever. And if I was lucky, I'd get pills from some people I met, who could easily get anything I needed. I was doing well with my problem, I was losing weight, getting skinnier each day, and it was going perfectly fine until a hot day came through Florida – a really hot day. I hadn't eaten and drank anything all day besides a small glass of water. When I fainted in class, I was rushed to the emergency room, where they hooked me up to machines and got fluids running through my body. When my mum and brother came, and later Holly, the doctor had told them what happened, and they diagnosed me with Anorexia Nervosa. I hated those words with everything inside of me. It made me feel sick, and I know that I wasn't, I just wanted to feel good about myself. When they'd checked me for anything else, just to be safe, my heart wrenched in fear when they found my scars, all up my arms. They then diagnosed me with depression, right then and there, surprisingly.

After we were told everything needed, the doctors wanted to send me to a rehabilitation center, but since I was just then 18, I refused, and I promised that I'd stop. I did, I stopped for awhile, I tried to get better, but I couldn't. After a while, I started again, all of it, slowly and sneaky so they wouldn't know. I began to cut my hips and my upper legs. I would sometimes eat, but then throw it up afterwords. I know how it sounds, and it makes everyone sick who knows, but if you were in my shoes, you'd understand, completely.

“Lana? Hello, earth to Lana boo!” I snapped out of my thoughts and turned to my mum, who was chuckling away. “Jeez, are you alright?” I nodded, faking a yawn to signal that I was tired, but it was true, I was pretty jet legged from a 13 hour flight.

“How much longer,” I playfully whined, my mom rolling her eyes in response.

“Ten more minutes. And the boys will be there, probably playing games, as usual.” She rolled her eyes again with a small smile on her face. “I'm making some burgers tonight on the grill, is that okay? I.. I know how hard it is for you, it's only been a year and a half...”

I nodded, a fake smile upon my pink lips, “It's great mum, I'll love it. You always make the best burgers.” I could see the glisten in her eyes, and I felt horrible after she grabbed my leg with a little squeeze to say she was proud of me. But I didn't let that smile leave my face.

After the exact ten minutes that my mum presumed, she pulled up into our drive way, which looked all too familiar to me. I smiled again, it felt nice to be home. “Welcome home, Lana bear.” I chuckled at the nickname that I hadn't heard in so long as I hopped out of the car and grabbed my bag. I heard shouting and laughing inside and I guess it was the infamous boy band that I had yet to meet. “I'll take those, you go inside and say hi to your brother and meet the boys.”

“Thanks,” I smiled, handing her my bags. I hopped up the steps and opened the screen door, after I'd opened the second door I stepped inside, and the scent came crashing over me. This scent, the cinnamon candles that my mom always lit around the house, and just that smell of nostalgia turned me sort of sappy, and I wanted to cry, but I didn't let myself. “Liam?” I shouted, at first it was so quiet you could hear a needle drop. But then screaming and loud footsteps shocked my ears and within seconds that most familiar, loving face came into my view.

“Lana!” He shouted as he ran towards me. I giggled as he wrapped his arms around me and picked me up, swinging me around. I grasped him tightly, smiling as he did this. I missed this boy so much. “I've missed you,” He whispered into my hair as he let me down. I looked up at him and smiled, grabbing him in another hug.

“I've missed you too, Liam,” I swallowed back a sob, no, I couldn't cry; control your emotions, Lana. As we both turned around, I saw four boys slightly behind him, smiling away at us. I couldn't remember their names, exactly, but their faces were familiar from the television.

“Oh, Lana, these are the boys,” Liam pointed them out. “This here is Niall, Zayn, Louis -” who winked playfully at me, “and Harry.” I smiled with a small hello at all of them, each of them greeting me with a personalized hello. But the last boy really caught my eye, Harry? He wouldn't stop staring, and the smile on his face got my heart to stutter. I think it was his vibrant green eyes that really caught my attention. Or maybe it was his dimples, perfectly aligned on his face. But maybe it was his cheshire cat smile that had me smiling more than I should have been. What is this?

“Hi,” He stepped forward, taking my hand casually, “I'm Harry”