Who Knew Then? (What We Know Now?)

“FASTER! COME ON BOYS, MOVE IT!” the coach hollered, and I winced yet again. Tanya had smacked my hands when I’d started biting my nails, and now I was reduced to shaking and occasionally pacing when I wasn’t holding Levi. While Jared wasn’t doing bad, he wasn’t standing out in practice either, the way Eric or Jeff Skinner were. I was nervous for him; I wasn’t sure how he’d take it if he didn’t make it this year, especially not when this was the year for him to re-sign, and I knew that if he felt like he wasn’t doing good enough he’d worry himself to death that they’d just let him go. He’d been fairly anxious whenever he thought about it during the summer, especially after hearing about other guys getting re-signed, but we’d all assured him they just wanted him there to speak to him personally about it, which he’d clung to and was still hoping for.

“Easy there Kass,” Tanya soothed, putting a hand on my shoulder. Parker was playing at our feet with his Transformers toys, and Levi was curled up comfortably in his mom’s arms.

“I’m sorry, it’s just… it’ll kill him if he doesn’t make it, and it’ll be worse than that if he doesn’t get another contract,” I whispered, and she nodded.

“I know sweetie, but you’ve got to relax; he needs you to be the relaxed, calm one right now,” she told me, and again I nodded. It wasn’t like this was the first time I’d had to be here for him like this, but I knew this year would be even harder than the very first one.

“Mommy?” Parker asked, tugging at the leg of her jeans.

“What honey?”

“Unca Jared isn’t gonna die, is he?” he asked, and we both nearly began laughing.

“No sweetheart, he’s not. Kassy means that it will really make him upset,” she gently explained, and Parker nodded before taking a long look at the ice and then settling back onto the floor with his toys. Tanya and I went back to watching the practice, and the scrimmage. Jared managed a breakaway, but couldn’t score on Ward to make good on it. I saw how defeated he looked as they skated towards the tunnel to end practice, and shared a look with Tanya.

“It looks like I’m making chicken spinach lasagna tonight… maybe that will help?” she suggested, making me laugh.

“I don’t know Tan, but we can try,” I told her, and took Levi from her as Parker wanted up, his two toys in hand. Levi squirmed momentarily before settling into my side as we made our way down to the lounge to see Eric and Jared.

“Hey sweetheart,” I managed a smile for Jared as he came out of the locker room, and an exhausted smile graced his fact. That was a good sign at least.

“Hey,” he returned, and pulled me in for a quick kiss, before ruffling Levi’s hair and kissing the top of his head, making his nephew giggle.

“How’s my boy?” he asked, and Levi shrieked happily, the baby talk coming out a million miles a minute. Levi was going to be turning two this December, but after having troubles with his ears – several severe ear infections and tubes a few times – his speech development had been slowed down. Eric and Tanya had worried a lot about him, but the doctors had assured them it was just because he’d had so much trouble hearing that he would be slower to pick up on speaking. But he’d managed quite a few words already, and we all figured that as long as his ears stayed good he’d be speaking pretty quickly.

“Whoa! Staalsie, when were you gonna tell us?” Keegan asked, and we both turned to look at him, confused.

“Tell you what?”

A pointed look at Levi made it clear, and my face began to turn read. Keegan had just been drafted the year before, and hadn’t been playing in Charlotte.

“This is Levi; my nephew,” Jared introduced him, and moments later Keegan’s face was fire-engine red.

“O-oh, I’m sorry, I mean, he looks just like you so I just assumed,” he stuttered, and we both managed to laugh.

“He should, all four of us look alike,” Eric laughed as he walked over, and if possible Keegan’s face darkened. Tanya laughed and Parker rolled his eyes.

“That’s my brover – Unca Jared and Aunt Kassy don’t have a baby!” Parker informed him, and moments later Keegan made an embarrassed exit. I felt relieved at the look on Jared’s face – he seemed to have forgotten his poor mood earlier, and wrapped his arms around me as we stood and visited while we waited for Tanya and Eric. Of course all of the teammates wanted to say hello to Tanya and take a chance to play with or tease Parker, who, along with Ward’s kids, seemed to belong to the whole team rather than just their parents.

When we finally made it back to Eric and Tanya’s place I was exhausted, and I knew Jared was in the same state. After a quiet dinner we all retired to the living room, a Disney movie on the TV for Parker and Levi, and both Eric and Jared were head-bobbing as they tried to stay awake.

“Honey, we should go to bed,” I quietly suggested, and Jared nodded, rubbing his eyes and yawning, looking much like Levi.

“See you in the morning,” Tanya smiled, and Eric repeated it. Once they realized we were going to bed Parker and Levi jumped up to come and give us both hugs goodnight.

Once we were in our room downstairs Jared stripped off his T-shirt and jeans, and then crawled under the covers as he flipped them back on my side for me to crawl in. I pulled off my jeans and shirt, reaching for my pajamas under my pillow before Jared wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into him.

“Hey,” I couldn’t withhold the giggle as I flailed slightly, knowing I didn’t stand a chance against him.

“Come on, you don’t need PJ’s,” he argued as he nuzzled my neck.

“Yes I do – you have two nephews in this house who have no qualms about crawling in,”

“I’m not wearing PJ’s,” he reminded me, making me snort as I rolled so I could face him.

“You’re a boy, it’s different. The kids are used to Eric doing that, they aren’t used to having a girl walking around in anything close to this,” I sighed, and he let out a whine.

“No-o,” he complained before I felt the soft nip of his teeth on my neck.

“Jared,” I meant to reprimand him, but it came out as more of a sigh as his hands slid down my sides to my hips and he pulled me against his hard body.

“What Kass?” he asked, his lips playing along my skin, and the thin material of his boxers did nothing to hide his excitement.

“This is a bad idea,” I said, and not moments later we heard footsteps on the stairs, and I hardly had time to pull my tank top over my head and slip into the old pair of his boxers before we heard the soft knocking on our bedroom door.

“Unca Jared? Aunty Kassy?” Parker’s voice was quiet and shaky as he stood on the other side of the door.

“Yes bud?” Jared asked, and soon the door slowly opened and the little blonde boy stuck his head in the door.

“I can’t sweep - can I crawl in wif you?” he asked. I looked to Jared and then nodded, and Parker bounded over before leaping onto the bed and crawling in between us. He curled into my side and grabbed Jared’s hand.

“You okay sweetie? Did you have a bad dream?” I asked, and he nodded.

“What was it Park?” Jared asked, and the little boy just shook his head.

“Scary,” was all he would say, and we left it at that. To be honest I was surprised he’d came downstairs instead of going to Eric and Tanya’s room, but Parker loved Jared to no end.

We talked about unimportant things until Parker drifted off to sleep, and then made ourselves comfortable. I leaned over to peck Jared’s lips before settling down, my arm over Parker’s sleeping form and around Jared, much like his was around me.

“See? I told you it was a bad idea,” I informed him, and seconds later we were both trying not to burst into laughter.

“Shut up, how was I supposed to know my nephew would crawl in with us instead of with his mom and dad?” he asked. I shrugged, before kissing his nose.

“Because he idolizes you,” I replied, and Jared shook his head.

“You’re full of it; we all know how he copycats Eric,”

“He copycats you all the time too Jare, even if you won’t believe it. Did you see his the super-hero picture he drew at pre-school the other day?” I asked him.

“No, I didn’t get to see any of the pictures he brought home,”

“He drew you Jare. Granted your feet were both turned the same way and you looked a little funny…” I trailed off as he chuckled. “But he drew you.”

“You sure you didn’t just mistake Eric in the drawing for me?”

“No, because the teacher wrote what Parker told her to on the paper, and he said that he drew his uncle Jared because his uncle never let anything stop him or make him feel bad, and he wanted to be just like him and play hockey even if he didn’t play in the NHL,” I whispered, and Jared was speechless.

“He really does idolize you Jare, I know you think you’re not somebody because you’re not in the NHL, but you’re somebody to me, and you’re somebody to him,” I told him, and laid back down, the shocked look on his face burned into the back of my eyelids. He needed to realize just how much he meant to everyone else, regardless of where he was playing.