An Undeniable Need

Zach laid in her bed, his head on her chest and his arms tightly around her. The room was dark and silent. Just like Zach had wanted. All he had wanted was a dark room, a bed, and his tiny brunette girlfriend.

"I tried so hard," He whispered, his voice full of pain. He brought a hand to his face and wiped his tears away.

"I know, baby." She replied, running her hand through his hair.

"I fought so hard and once again I got crushed," Zach stated. "Just like the Olympics all over again."

"You can't compare the two," She stated. "It's two totally different things. The Olympics was a collection of the greatest players in the world. This was just the two greatest teams in the league."

"You don't get it Evanna," Zach sighed, pulling away from her.

"You're right, I don't get it. I understand that you're sad you lost the playoffs, but what I don't get is why you're still going on about the Olympics. You lost the gold in the most admirable way possible. You forced overtime and no, you guys didn't win. But if you had to get silver one way at least be happy it was that way," Evanna sighed.

"I feel like a failure," Zach replied, playing with the bed sheet. "I have to follow behind my Dad in this sport and that's not an easy thing to do."

"Stop trying to be like him," Evanna shrugged. "You're Zach Parise, you're incredible."

Zach scoffed and continued to avoid her eyes, staying leaned up against the headboard. Evanna crawled to him and straddled his lap. She held his shoulders and pinned him back against the headboard.

"Zach," Evanna stated, bringing her body close to his. "Put your hands on my hips and look at me."

Zach put his hands firmly on her hips, his pupils dilating when he looked at her. He flipped her on her back and kissed her forcefully.

"You didn't let me say my speech!" She laughed as he kissed down her neck to her collarbone.

"You can say it after we have sex," Zach mumbled, pulling off her shirt and attacking her chest with his mouth and hands.

"Can I ask how it is that you went from being so upset and down on yourself to being frisky and the horniest I've seen you in weeks?" Evanna smiled, wrapping her legs tighter around his waist.

"Because you drive me fucking insane," Zach mumbled, coming up to kiss her again. "You were ordering me around and treating me like a man, and not some broken hearted little boy. And you don't seem to be wearing any underwear, and you were straddling me. So..."

Maybe that's why none of their issues ever got solved. All they did was have sex. Anytime something like a fight happened or was about to happen, one of them would initiate sex and then it was done. Then eventually they blew up at one another and everything came out during huge fights. They were toxic together.

Toxic, but he loved her. Even when they were screaming at one another, he adored her. The little voice in his head that told him to be angry was always overpowered by the voice in his head reminding him of how beautiful she was. Instead of staying mad he would grab her and kiss her, he put all of his energy into making sure she was satisfied.

Zach turned and looked at the woman laying in bed next to him. When they fought, they went all out. They never grabbed one another and kissed halfway during the fight, they never started laughing because what they were fighting over was so stupid. When they had sex he still put all of his energy into making sure she was satisfied, he wasn't a jerk, but it never seemed to work for her. No matter how hard he tried.

With Evanna it was easy. All he had to do was put a hand on her neck and pull her mouth to his and she was melting in his hands, begging him for more in seconds. DeAnn was harder to crack and after almost three years together he still couldn't figure out what to do to make her like that. He had tried everything in his arsenal and nothing worked.

It wasn't that Zach didn't love DeAnn, he did. He just loved her in a different way than he had loved Evanna. With Evanna it was a passionate love. Their life wasn't about golf benefits and dinner parties. It was all they could do to get about of bed most days, and when they did they were all over one another. Then once they'd had enough of facing the public they'd retreat home, have sex and stay up all night talking. For years that was their life.

With DeAnn it was different. Evanna would grope Zach in a corner, deserted hallway or beneath a table- she was playful and brought out his bad side. DeAnn would hold his hand, introduce him to people, and make plans for golf days. Zach grew up a lot when he started seeing DeAnn. To an outsider, Zach had always been the proper, well-spoken one. In reality he would always be that horny, bad mouthed 22 year old who put on a front for important people. When he was alone with his girlfriend, he was anything but proper and well spoken.

He wished DeAnn was more adventurous in the ways that Evanna was. He wanted to come home from road trips and be immediately greeted by a half-naked woman hanging off of him. Instead he gets a, "hi, honey" when he walks in the door and a small kiss. He wanted DeAnn to tell him what she liked when they were in bed together. He wanted to have sex in the shower, on the kitchen table, on the floor- just like he used to with Evanna.

"You want her to be Evanna," His brother had once told him. "I don't know why you broke up with Evanna. You clearly want to be with her or someone like her."

Maybe he did. Maybe he had made a mistake leaving Evanna. He had his reasons though, and he thought they were good. He laid down again next to the woman in his bed. She scooted away from him to give him more room, but she never pushed back. Evanna always pushed back.

"Hey, you." He whispered, turning towards her and taking hold of her gently. "Get back here."

DeAnn put her hands on top of his and nestled back against him. Zach felt a wave of relief.

"I love you, Zach." DeAnn mumbled tiredly.

"I love you, too." Zach nodded, kissing her shoulder.