The "I" In Lie

It had been nearly 4 years since the last time I had seen Pete. A long 4 years that were a wave of happiness and joy. I had married Ryan and we had a son, Jack and a dog Captain; it was a happy life of mine.

In those long 4 years, I thought about Pete from time to time. A lot of times I would drive by the bar and see Joe. He never talked about Pete, and I didn't know if he knows about us. I do know that Pete still owns half of Angels and Kings; he's never around whenever I go around.

Jack usually is on my mind. He keeps me on my toes and preoccupied. He's 3 years old and looks just like Ryan; he has the mousy brown hair, the wide, puppy dog eyes and wide grin. I love him to death, he makes me the happiest person on the planet. He's what I live for, the last man to ever disappoint me.

I had married Ryan a couple of months after choosing him over Pete. It was a quickie wedding that happened on a trip to Las Vegas. It was around the time of our honeymoon that I got pregnant with Jack. It was a big, joyous event -my pregnancy- that we both were nervous about. We obviously got through it unscathed.

We moved into a bigger home for Jack and Captain. One that we moved into a few weeks before Jack's birth. During that time I often wondered if Pete would come to my old house and look for me. I wondered if he would just stop by to say hello and see that I didn't live there anymore. It's easy to say my feelings for Pete were still apparent and deep.

But, as the months and years passed, that thought went away. The only thought left was scattered wonder. If he was okay and if he was a dad. I had a thought of what he'd think about me being a mommy. I wondered if he would've been happy for me.


I worked part-time as a dental assistant and I spent the majority of my time raising Jack. Ryan worked as a teacher still and gave guitar lessons out of the house, so we're financially okay. Most of my days are spent walking Captain and taking Jack out so we wouldn't be cooped up in the house. I always took Jack and Captain to the playground. I love to watch them run around and push Jack on the swing.

So, today was no different.

Jack held my hand, his little feet thumping whenever he stopped to jump over a crack in the pavement. We were alone today, because Ryan took Captain to get his annual shots at the vet. Jack immediately led me to the swings, where it was empty.

I picked him up, setting him in the swing and began to push him. He giggled at me, smiling widely until a shadow casted over him. His smiled faded, I looked over and caught a gasp in my throat.

There was Pete. How cliche, right?

"Long time no see." Pete's voice was as smooth as I remembered.

I smiled shyly, slowing my son's swing, "Hi."

"So, you're a mommy now?" he asked curiously.

I hummed, "Yeah, this is Jack."

Pete waved at Jack, he waved back, "Hiya."

Pete chuckled, "He looks like Ryan."

I nodded, "Yeah, that's what everyone says."

"How old is he?"

"3." I said with a smile, "He'll be 4 next January."

Pete gave a small sigh, "Well, I'm happy for you."

I patted his arm, "Thank you. What about you?"

"I have a son, too. With Michelle. He turned 4 a couple months back. His name is Jamie."

"Oh. Where is he?" I asked.

Pete pointed across from us; a little boy with shaggy brown hair was playing in the sand with a few other kids. I smiled, "He's cute."

"Splitting image of myself." he said softly.

"Are you with anybody?" I turned my head and kept pushing Jack gently.

"Uh, no. Not now. I'm only focused on Jamie." Pete's smiled back over to his son, then looked at me, "You and Ryan?"

"We got married 6 months after everything." I informed him quietly.

Pete sighed, "I'm sorry, y'know, about the way I treated you." 

I waved it off, "It's okay."

"No," he shook his head, "It wasn't. I never knew how you felt about me. I wish I had."

"It goes both ways, I didn't know how you felt either."

"I wish we would've told each other." he added.

I shrugged to myself, "Yeah, but we wouldn't have these little guys." I smiled.

Pete chuckled, "Yeah, you're right."

We were quiet for a moment; the sound of a nursery rhyme started to play. Jack screamed happily, "Ice cream!"

I laughed as he launched himself into my arms and I hiked him up on my hip, "Let's go get ice cream." 

"Daddy!" a little voice called, "I want ice cream!"

Pete laughed, "Yeah, okay, J."

Pete looked at me, "I'll buy you guys ice cream."

"It's cool--"

He cut me off, "Just let me do it, Aly."

I smiled and nodded, "Yeah, fine."

I could never say no to Pete.