Don't Let These Boots Fool You

I woke to a warm body behind me and remembered that Jordan had stayed in my room since Missy had arrived. I quickly tried to get up without waking him because I had more stuff to get ready for the evening than I had remembered. As the cold air floated across my warm skin I felt the goose bumps rise up on my arms. I slipped on a pair of my sweatpants lying across the chair in the corner of the room and found one of Jordan’s t-shirts to slip on before walking out of the kitchen to leave a note telling them how long I would be gone.

The rink was quiet as I opened the door to the hallway to the locker room. I saw Steve standing near the doorway and smiled at him. He had been there for nearly ten years and was one of the best security guards in the building. He still looked as if he could knock someone out with just a right hook. I walked through the slightly smelly locker room and straight to the ice.

Everything was extremely quiet as I began to place gift baskets places for the children. I soaked in the silence and realized that this was why I had gone into the job that I had for a reason. As I moved around the bench and placed a few more gift baskets I heard some feet shuffling along the carpet leading to the locker room. “Excuse me Ms. Kelly,” my head whipped up at the sound of his voice, “There is a man outside claiming to be your fiancé.”

My heart dropped out of my chest and quickly stopped beating it felt like. He had followed me to work. I wondered what would stop him and take him completely out of my life. I placed the basket by the entrance onto the ice and stood up facing Steve. “I’m not available, don’t let him in at all. Please and thank you Steve. I’ll walk with you to the locker room.”

Steve and I walked silently down the tunnel that led to the locker room. I quit following him as I walked to the box of custom t-shirts that I had made for every child. I began to hang the jerseys in each of the lockers losing myself in the task at hand. I had almost forgotten that Steve was still in the building until his voice poked through my concentration. “Ms. Kelly, I told him he had to leave but he wasn’t too happy about it. Said he’d be back.”

I knew it would come to this eventually I only hoped that Jordan’s lawyer could get the restraining order to go through. “Thanks Steve. You made sure he’s out of the parking lot right? I just finished up in here and need to go home to change and make sure that my sister is okay.” He just nodded his head at me as I kissed his cheek as I walked out. I held a soft spot for Steve because he had been a former military guy and my family had many men who served.

I tried not to think about the fact that Mike had shown up at the arena as I drove home. Maybe I was silently praying that he wouldn’t show up at my house, but then again I knew that he had no idea where I lived because he had never come to my house I always had to meet him somewhere else.

I slipped into the house and heard Jordan and Missy laughing at some movie that they were watching and smiled. They were getting along great and that made me feel better since she would be living with us for a while. I hadn’t realized how much I missed living in a busy house like I had grown up in. I slipped past them and walked straight into my bathroom. I flipped the handle to start the water in the shower before looking at myself in the mirror.

There were no more bags under my eyes as there had been back when Brett died. My weight had finally evened out after I had started eating regularly again. But the thing I noticed most was my eyes had a sparkle in them that had disappeared for the longest time. I knew that everything would eventually be okay again and that I would survive whatever had been thrown at me.

I felt the steam wrapping around my body and decided that getting into the shower might be a good idea if I wanted to be on time to the event that night. I grabbed the bottom of my shirt to pull it off when I heard the door open. “Mind if I join you?”

Jordan stood in the doorway with his shirt off and his pajama pants slung low on his hips. I wondered what had brought him into the bathroom, what gave him the courage or the drive to do it. I just wanted to be a normal person again. I didn’t want to be the girl who had moved to Philly, nearly dated Sidney, or the girl who lost her brother and couldn’t function. I nodded my head and watched him step closer to me, helping me to remove my clothes.

He had quietly removed both my clothes and his. I felt vulnerable here. At this point he could easily see the scars on my body that had come from many different moments in my life. I knew he had to see the scar on my collar bone from when I fell off of a horse when I was ten. The big thing I knew he would notice was the tattoo running up my ribs. If I had kept my shirt on no one could see it and I knew it had to be a surprise to him.

“How long have you had that?” his confusion was written in his knit eye brows and his squinted expression.

“Brett and I got matching tattoos when he got engaged to Missy. It was our way of saying that no matter what we would always be linked together by our bond. His is actually a pin up of Missy, but the funny thing is he made it Missy’s body and my face. I got this pin up girl in western clothes because Brett ran the farm. You’re only the second person to actually see it.” I smiled at him. Even though I had nearly stripped in front of Danny he had never seen the tattoo. Mike hated the tattoo, he didn’t understand why a woman would want another woman on her body, nor did he understand the meaning behind it.

He took in the sight in front of him, smiled quietly before he grabbed my hand and pulled me into the shower. “You know that Missy said I should suck it up and just go for it with you.” He mumbled as he stood under the water.

I looked up at him and wondered what else Missy had told him while I was away at work. She knew more about me than most people because in order to know Brett she had to know me. I tried to avoid Jordan’s gaze because what he could say next could be any different type of statement. I needed to suck it up and face the issues that I had tried to avoid for most of my life, hell what I had avoided for most of my time with Jordan.

“Look, right now is the only time I will have the balls to do this so I’m going to tell you now.” He shut the water off, leaned out of the shower and grabbed two towels. He wrapped the first towel deftly around his waist before wrapping the second one around my body. He pushed the curtain to where he could sit on the edge of the expansive tub. I stood awkwardly in front of him as I tried to calm myself for whatever he was going to say.

“I’m trying to figure out what I should be doing. I’m lost.” He stared at his hands that had been shaking since he sat down. He continued to look at his hands as he tried to finish his explanation. “I want you so bad, but you deserve to be taken on a date with roses and be able to dress pretty. I’ve never had to actually date a girl. Believe me I’m changing, I want to be the best man I can for you because that is what you deserve.”

Jordan looked so vulnerable for the first time since I had met him. “Don’t you understand you have been?” I felt my words echo against the walls as his head snapped up to look at me. “The day you ditched your bombshell to deal with a crying me? Or how about the fact you called me every day after I left? Maybe I knew I deserved something like you once you picked me up from the airport at three in the morning after I had left without a good reason.” Tears started to trickle down my cheeks as I clutched the towel to my chest, trying to control my feelings.

He stood up, his chest was close to me. It felt as if he was standing next to someone he wanted to fight. I got nervous as I tried to figure out his next move. I watched his chest rise and fall as his arms slowly lifted before they rested on my neck. His lips crushed mine, the pressure of our previous discussion had washed away with that simple kiss.

Jordan’s arms lifted me up, carrying me to the bed where he sat me down on top of the comforter. Before I could put my lips back on his he was walking toward the closet. I was a bit confused until I saw him come back in with sweat pants slung low on his hips. I knew he had to think I was broken still, even after our previous conversations.

I had missed the shirt he had brought for me in his hand until his body weight caused the mattress to sink in further. “I’m going to do this right Kelly. I want you, don’t get me wrong I want you so badly. I’m going to take you out after the event. I guess Missy wanted you to go out anyways and made plans with Sidney so she had someone to wait on her hand and foot. Plus said birdy told me that it’s your birthday.” His smile spread across his face.

I pushed myself off the bed and began walking toward the walk in closet. “Fine I guess we’ll go out after the event. Now if you’ll excuse me I have to look pretty.” I shut the door to the closet and sat at the vanity I had moved in there to fix my hair and makeup before I lost my gumption.

Making my hair hold loose curls was easy, putting my makeup on was equal easy. Finding an outfit that would work for both the event and going out on a date with Jordan was the hard part. I looked at skirts, jeans, dresses. I nearly put sweatpants on until I remembered how these kids saw me. To them I was the idea of what could be of their lives. I tugged dark jeans over my hips before pushing my feet in my worn out cowboy boots.

Jordan opened the door a bit poking his head in the doorway, he looked as if he was nervous which made me smile. “Missy and I are waiting on you. Come on.”

I shuffled out of the closet and followed behind Jordan to the front door pulling his jersey over my head as we walked out the front door. I noticed the snow had begun to fall as I looked at Missy sitting in the back seat. The ride to the arena looked gorgeous, the city was relatively quiet for 6 on New Year’s Eve. We arrived at the backdoor of the arena where the players typically walked in. Tonight I would help escort the kids we had invited through this entrance.

This event could possibly be one of the best nights for most of these kids. I waited at the back door until I saw the bus pulling into the parking lot. I watched as all of the kids and parents got off of the bus. I guided all of the children in to the building following the last one into the building.

They followed in awe as we walked to the locker room where they found their personalized lockers and personal jerseys. Their smiles brought a warmth to me that I hadn’t felt in a long time. It finally hit me as I watched their parents help lace up their skates, I was living again. I had found the girl I was before I lost Brett and got treated poorly by my ex-fiancé.

“You did an amazing job planning this and I’m glad to see my son enjoying his life for a day.” The mom of a boy smiled as she hugged me quickly. Her thanks caused a blush to rise up in my cheeks as I watched the kids try to run out to the ice where all of the players were waiting for the kids.

I made sure all of the kids had gotten to the ice before walking back toward the locker room. I felt the tears trying to start falling from my eyes. I had given these kids a night that they wouldn’t forget. It’s the little things for these kids, it doesn’t matter that they have cancer tonight, they are getting to live their lives.

I heard footsteps getting closer as I looked up from the locker stall I was sitting in. I wiped the tears away from my cheeks before looking up to see who was coming down the tunnel. “Kelly?” I looked up to see max as he continued to walk further into the locker room. “What are you doing in here? Come on put your skates on we’ve got twenty minutes until they all have to go home. No more crying.”

He moved to a different locker and grabbed something from in the locker. I looked up to see that he had a pair of women’s hockey skates similar to the teams. “Are these mine?” I looked up wide eyed and tried to fight back the tears that I knew were working their way up again.

“Yes they are. We bought them for you as a gift. Now come on the kids want to see Ms. Kelly too.” Max smiled while he tried to help me put my skates on. He tapped my leg letting me know I could stand with a smile on his face.

I walked toward the Ice and smiled at everyone skating around the rink. “You’re sister in law is amazing. She hasn’t taken anyone’s crap.” Max smiled as he too off onto the Ice. Missy stood beside Sidney as they looked deep in conversation.

The clock on the jumbotron said there were only five more minutes until their midnight. I skated toward the middle of the ice and looked up at the guy ready to release the confetti. Laughter filled the arena as everyone skated around.

I heard Jordan’s voice floating around behind me knowing that he had done just as I knew he would and would make friends with the kids. “How about I come visit next weekend after the All-star weekend? I’ll make sure that I bring that autograph that you wanted.”

The clock got to two minutes when I knew that the kids had to gather up otherwise they would miss their confetti being dropped. “Gather up everyone. Are you ready?” their voices began to count to ten before each of them smiled at the confetti falling from the sky.

The children squealed at the confetti, their parents took pictures and tried to not cry at the joy their children were feeling. Slowly the kids found their gift baskets behind the bench and their parents began driving them back to the hospitals. Many of the players wanted to stay in touch with the kids that they had gotten to know and promised to come and visit them again. I quickly changed out of my skates and back into my boots ready to spend some time with Jordan.

“Come on Kelly.” I turned around to find Jordan standing behind me. I smiled knowing he was taking me on an actual date. “Sidney is making dinner for Missy at his house and said to call if you need anything.” I laughed because Sid had really thought of everything.