Save Your Heart

I got home and found Jamie in the dining room, drinking coffee as usual and staring into nothing.

“Hey, Jamie.” I walked past to where she was sitting and got myself a bowl. I opened one of the brown cabinets to get some cereal then opened the refrigerator for some milk. I sat down across Jamie when I was satisfied with the bowl of cereal I made.

“He—what happened?” she asked me with a horrified look on her face. She must’ve noticed how puffy my eyes were from crying all the way home after I met Kennedy.

“Nothing.” I smiled at her crookedly.

“No, Aria. You need to tell me. Now.” She replied firmly with narrowed eyes.

“I-I thought I saw h-him. Cole, that is. But it was just my imagination,” I muttered, my voice getting a bit shaky.

“Aria…” she quickly moved over to me and hugged me as tight as she could.

“I don’t know who I am anymore, Jamie. I just—”

She cut me off by hugging me tighter and telling me that she knew.

And she did. She knew how I felt without me telling her details about it. She has known me all my life and it gave me some hope. She was always there, she never left me and I felt so bad for dragging her into my problems.

And I just sobbed. I cried on her shoulder because she was my best friend. She was the one who knew me the most. I cried on her shoulder and whimpered all my regrets to her.

“He’s gone now, A. For good. He won’t get you, shh. He won’t, I promise.” She stroked my hair and whispered soothing words to me as I cried.

When I stopped crying, which seemed like it took me forever to do so, I told her about Kennedy.

“He’s like one of the most beautiful men on earth!” Jamie exclaimed. I laughed at her expression, imagining what it would be like if she was there to meet Kennedy with me.

“I agree.”

“Well? What was he like?” she pushed and poked my side. I rolled my eyes at her.

“He was…nice? I don’t know Jamie. We didn’t talk much! Stop that!” I exclaimed as she continued to poke me.

“Aw come on! How can you be so calm about this?!”

“I was too starstrucked by his perfection,” I chuckled

“Whew, I thought I lost my best friend for a minute there,” she muttered. I snorted.

“Whatever, he’ll probably forget about me. I’m just a fan after all. Stop making a big deal out of it!” I shrugged.

“Just a fan, huh?” she stared at me incredulously.

I gave her another shrug.

“You’re Aria Grey, dammit! You can’t be forgotten, darling.” She rolled her eyes at me and shook her head.

“Whatever, Jamie.” I sighed heavily, finally finished with my cereal and stood up to wash the dishes. I don’t like it when people tell me who I am. I know who I am, okay? Let it go, jeez!

“What time is the show?” Jamie asked as she helped me with the dishes.

“I don’t know. Seven?” I shrugged.

“Okay. I’m going to get my camera from the office first then we’ll go get ready for your big date with Kennedy Brock,” she replied teasingly and bumped my hip with hers. I stumbled to the side and bumped her back.

“It’s a concert, Jamie! Oh my God.”

“Relax. I was just joking! Jesus,” she rolled her eyes at me and chuckled mischievously. I stuck my tongue out at her.
~

Jamie left to get her camera in the office while I took a bath. I got into my outfit for the night and texted her to hurry up. She arrived approximately 15 minutes after I texted her. She ran into the apartment and quickly got her bag and told me to lock the door behind me.

We arrived at the venue when Austin Gibbs was playing his last song. He was a charming man. He had this flirtatious and very gorgeous grin. He had the most amazing voice I ever heard live. He was making some jokes about how he can’t understand a single word some fans were saying to him earlier.

“I mean, fuck. I failed Spanish when I was in high school! Fuck you, guys!” he teased the fans which caused them to laugh and scream out his name.

“Well, no wonder. They fucking speak French, you idiot,” a voice yelled. I realized it was John. His lanky, sweaty figure walked on stage and told everyone they were doing a duet. Kennedy walked on stage as well and picked up an acoustic guitar. He winked and smiled at some fans and rolled his eyes at John and Austin.

“Alright, you guys. Don’t get too hyped about this duet, they might be dry humping each other very soon,” he chuckled into the microphone as he tuned the guitar. The fans laughed at his comment while Austin slapped the back of his head.

I laughed at them, almost forgetting how fun it was going to their shows.

Jamie and I didn’t join the large amount of kids that were gathered around the stage. We walked to the bar and sat down, ordering a couple of alcoholic drinks. I snapped my eyes back to the stage as Kennedy started the intro to Take Me Dancing. I looked at him. I mean I really looked at him. I studied his face, his handsome features and those beautiful hazel eyes. He seemed to be in a daze, he played his guitar as if it was the only thing that was keeping him alive. He smiled at the fans for a while and talked to them while he was playing. He was mouthing words to them even though he was busy playing.

And then I knew. Kennedy Brock was a real musician. He looked back down at his guitar again and smiled peacefully. Like he was content with where he was.

The complete opposite of how I felt.

I felt drawn to him. He was…different. Just as I was sipping on my drink, he looked at me. I didn’t know how he found me, I didn’t know why he was looking at me and I most definitely did not know why he was smiling at me. But I found myself smiling back. And I felt like I was in a daze too.

Jamie nudged me which made me look at her annoyingly. “What?”

“Looks like someone isn’t forgotten,” she replied, wagging her eyebrows at me.

I rolled my eyes at her. “Whatever, Jamie.”

“Whatever, Jamie!” She mimicked me in a high voice and stopped when the bartender started talking to her.

I laughed at her and finished my drink before looking back at the stage when the song was finished. The crowd cheered for the three guys on stage but I only noticed one particular person. And he was looking back at me with a soft smile.

Austin Gibbs said goodbye while John kissed him on the cheek which he wiped off in disgust. I still felt Kennedy’s eyes on me. Pat, Jared and Garrett walked on stage and waved to the fans before going to there positions.

“You have no idea how great it is to be here,” John said with a grateful tone.

“Yeah, I never expected to play in Paris with my lame band, ya know?” Garrett chimed in while the fans grew louder. “Plus, there are very pretty girls in Paris. Kenny here already met a girl he seems to like.”

“Yeah, fuck you Kenny for getting ass on this tour.” John added. “So this one’s for all the girls…and guys out there who have been personally victimized by Kennedy Brock.”

“You’ll realize how gay he is soon, ladies,” Garrett chuckled into the mic.

Kennedy rolled his eyes at John and cringed at their words before he looked at me with a smirk.

I felt my cheeks heat up as they started Right Girl. I smiled, this was one of my favorite songs.

Jamie was teasing me about Kennedy all night and I was very very flustered when she did.

The show was done and we were chilling outside of the venue. I was smoking and she was
whining about how much I should stop.

“I mean seriously Aria, that shit’s not good for you!”

“Bullshit. Nothing is,” I replied to her with a smirk.

“Well, whatever. If you want to die early, then fine.”

“I do want to die early. I don’t want to be old and wrinkly in my casket,”

“Right, you have a point. And a weird brain.”

“I don’t have a weird brain, it’s normal. Thoughts are weird, not brains.”

She shook her head at me incredulously. “I can’t disagree with that.”

I was almost done smoking when she said she was going to buy something from the convenient store nearby.

I nodded and told her I’d meet her there.

I enjoyed the silence of the night. I was staring into nothing for about ten minutes before I lit up another cigarette.

“I didn’t think you’d come to our show,” a tired voice spoke from behind me. I jumped, not knowing who it was. I was ready to run away from the stranger who might hurt me. You never know. The stranger took a step forward then I realized it was Kennedy and I sighed in relief.

I was shocked.

Relief? Why? I just met this guy a few hours ago. I didn’t know him that well. Fuck it, I don’t even know him. I didn’t know him yet I felt safe around him. I felt so safe that I could jump off a building and I somehow knew he would be there to tell me not to. But it was wrong to think that.

First, we didn’t know each other. Second, we’ve only met. Third, I have no right to say those things when I don’t know a single thing about him.

“W-well…I was going before I ran into you actually. I’ve been to your shows in Arizona as well.” I shook my head, what was I so nervous about?

“I know,” he simply stated, like it was the most normal thing in the world. I raised my eyebrows at him.

“What do you mean ‘you know’?”

“Well, you’re sort of hard not to notice.” He smiled at me sheepishly. I wasn’t even famous when I went to their shows. I blushed and smiled back.

“I wasn’t Aria Grey back then, how do you even…”

“Well, I always noticed you. Then I was curious about you and as a few years went by, I saw you in a magazine and finally discovered your name,” he shrugged.

I was flattered, to be honest. He knew me before I was this. He knew me before I was broken.

Broken in the sense that maybe, just maybe, I’ve gone beyond repair. He didn’t know me as a person then, but it gave me hope. Hope that I might go back to the person I was. The person who wasn’t always looking back at her footsteps because she’s afraid someone else’s were following her own.

“That’s…very comforting.” I smiled at him softly. He gave me a confused look and I just shrugged at him. His eyes landed on the cigarette I was smoking, he was amused.

“I thought models didn’t smoke?” he asked warily.

“Well, I do. Those fuckers are just too uptight.”

He laughed at my reply. “You’re not bad, Aria. Not one bit.”

I just laughed at him. You’ll see.